Tiger Woods Porn Parody
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Tiger Woods Porn Parody
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Mar 18, 2010, 05:12 AM EDT | Updated May 25, 2011
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E! reports the film is billing itself "as the 'official porn parody' of the non-golf exploits of the sports icon. The script riffs on the story and (presumably) makes up stuff where it might make things spicier."
Unfortunately, we think the title is a little lacking in the humor department. Pornos have long been known as the go-to genre for pun titles, so let's help them out. What SHOULD the name of this film be? Add your suggestion to the comments section and we'll pick the best ones and highlight them here!
Part of HuffPost Entertainment. ©2022 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved.
Mar 18, 2010, 05:12 AM EDT | Updated Dec 6, 2017
Don't miss a beat. Your culture and entertainment cheat-sheet.
Stephen Colbert Spots Exact Moment Steve Bannon Spilled The Beans On Trump
Trevor Noah Raises Eyebrows At Secret Service's 'Perfect' Missing Texts Excuse
Glenn Ivey, Former Prosecutor Buoyed By Pro-Israel Money, Wins Heated Maryland Primary
Joe Rogan Slammed Over 'Repulsive' Proposal To 'Just Go Shoot' Homeless People
Tucker Carlson All Out Embraces 'Great Replacement' Theory
Fake Electors Are Now ‘Targets’ In Georgia Probe Of Trump’s Effort To Overturn 2020 Vote
Wisconsin GOP Leader Says Trump's Still Begging Him To Decertify 2020 Election
Trump-Backed Dan Cox Wins Maryland GOP Gubernatorial Nomination
Argentinian Soccer Player Struck Down By Projectile Fish
Quidditch Changes Its Name To Distance Itself From J.K. Rowling
These 157 House Republicans Voted Against Protections For Same-Sex Marriage
Republicans Say They're Not Coming For Gay Marriage. They Said That About Roe, Too.
Senate Confirms Michelle Childs To Powerful D.C. Circuit Court Of Appeals
House Passes Bill To Protect Same-Sex Marriage In Rebuke To Supreme Court
Trump Impeachment Lawyer’s Abortion Answer Prompts Pile-On In New York Primary
Part of HuffPost Entertainment. ©2022 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved.
He's (allegedly!) had sex with porn stars, and now Tiger Woods will be the subject of a porn.
"Tiger's Wood" is the title of the upcoming adult film, which bills itself, reports E! , "as the 'official porn parody' of the non-golf exploits of the sports icon. The script riffs on the story and (presumably) makes up stuff where it might make things spicier."
Porn star Kayden Kross tweeted that she has been cast as Tiger's wife "porn-Elin," and that Tyler Knight will play Tiger.
Meanwhile Tyler blogged , "I'm Tiger Woods, bitches."
Meanwhile Vivid, which is not producing "Tiger's Wood," is offering big bucks to any former Woods' mistress who will star in a porn.
The company has also offered up to $1 million "to any paramour of Tiger Woods" who would star in a Vivid film.
"Our offer is to actual proven paramours of Tiger Woods who agree to star in a Vivid film and provide details and an explicit look of what Tiger experienced still holds," Hirsch continued. "It seems the chance we'll be taken up gets better as the days go on."
BELOW ARE NSFW PHOTOS OF KAYDEN FROM HER WEBSITE & THE BOX FOR TYLER'S DOLL:
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The porn parody you have been waiting for has finally arrived. Like a tiny, dirty time capsule it will tell the tale of one great man's fall for generations to come, like Oedipus only not as gross.
"The media is like the weather, only it's man-made weather." Mickey Knox, Natural Born Killers
It seems like only yesterday that professional super golfer Tiger Woods was on top of the world. Then came the fall. The rest is, as they say, tabloid history. Even as we write this, the number of alleged mistresses continues climb more rapidly than an early stage venereal infection racing towards seroconversion. Mirroring this rapid growth phase like a tiny microcosm are the number of porn parody spin off's, a walking zombie apocalypse of poorly constructed parody essentially holy unbirthed by the toxicity of the media event. The fact that two of the accusing mistresses are actually porn (escort) stars means that this twisted fairy tale was guaranteed to devolve into a living breathing simulacrum of Baudrillardian proportions no matter what happened—a sexual carnival colliding into demented Disneyland for adults.
Out of this mess, one parody dared to rise above the rest, labeling themselves the official Tiger Woods porn parody and claiming the controversy from day one. That movie was "Tyler's Wood" from Adam & Eve. Directed by the ubiquitous David Lord, the parody de jour was the final contract movie for blonde sex goddess Kayden Kross before moving over to Digital Playground. Shot at the outset of the uproar, when news reports were adding details hour by hour, making the script an evolving work in progress, production did not wrap until the wee hours of Christmas Eve.
But can something born out of hype, wrapped in hyperbole, and spoon fed to the masses ever live up to its reputation? We'd like to think it just might, but in the end only you can decide. Which is why we're going to refrain from too much commentary, leaving these exclusive pictures that only Fleshbot has to speak for themselves. We will, however, leave you with the scene order, so that you can work out who did what to whom.
"Tyler's Wood" stars Kayden Kross fucking Evan Stone, as well as Diana Doll. It also has Tyler Knight having a magnificent threeway with Andi Anderson and Richelle Ryan before making sweet, dirty, orgasm inducing love to Natasha Nice. It is available now via the interwebs and VOD and will be out on DVD before you know it. Let us know what you think.
Tyler Knight and Natasha Nice
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Tyler Knight, Andi Anderson, and Richelle Ryan
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Tyler Knight, Andi Anderson, and Richelle Ryan
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Tyler Knight, Andi Anderson, and Richelle Ryan
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Tyler Knight, Andi Anderson, and Richelle Ryan
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Tyler Knight, Andi Anderson, and Richelle Ryan
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Tyler Knight and Natasha Nice
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Tyler Knight and Natasha Nice
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Tyler Knight and Natasha Nice
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Tyler Knight and Natasha Nice
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Tyler Knight and Natasha Nice
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Tyler Knight and Capri Cavelli
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Tyler Knight and Capri Cavelli
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Tyler Knight and Capri Cavelli
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Tyler Knight and Capri Cavelli
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Tyler Knight and Capri Cavelli
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Tyler Knight and Capri Cavelli
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Tyler Knight, Andi Anderson, and Richelle Ryan
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Kayden Kross and Diana Doll
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Kayden Kross and Diana Doll
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Kayden Kross and Diana Doll
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Kayden Kross and Diana Doll
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Kayden Kross and Diana Doll
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Kayden Kross and Evan Stone
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Kayden Kross and Evan Stone
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Kayden Kross and Evan Stone
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Kayden Kross and Evan Stone
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Kayden Kross and Evan Stone
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Kayden Kross and Evan Stone
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Kayden Kross and Evan Stone
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
Kayden Kross and Evan Stone
Buy "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
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It is a testament to the creativity of the porn industry that the Tiger Woods sex scandal birthed not one, but two parody porns, both out this month.
Yes, Tigerphiles can see their hero recreated, in all his scandalous glory, both as Tyler Wood (in Adam & Eve's "Tyler's Wood" ) and Tiger Would (in ZB Ventures' "Tiger's Got Wood," distributed by Wicked Pictures). But what if you've only got the money to pick up one Tiger parody porn?
Well, they both have clever names and performances by Evan Stone, Diana Doll, and Richelle Ryan...but what makes them different ? Based solely on preview picks and PR hype, here are our thoughts:
The Name Game: Any parody bold enough to actually use the real name of its subject gets automatic points from us. Alas, no one had the balls to shoot "Tiger Woods XXX"--but Tiger Would is vastly closer to the real thing than Tyler Wood. Furthermore, "Tiger's Got Wood" immediately calls to mind the scandal-ridden golf star, while "Tyler's Wood" sounds more like a porno set in the back woods of a Connecticut estate.
[ At left: Tiger Would's post-coital fist pump. ]
Casting: We're torn on the issue of leading men: on the one hand, Jonny Slim actually bears a passing resemblance to Tiger Woods (at least in that he's light skinned and appears to be tall and slender). On the other hand, Tyler Knight makes us weak in the knees--and we never pass up a chance to watch him get his fuck on. Consider this one a draw.
We're also a bit torn on the matter of Elin (or, as she's listed in "Tiger's Got Wood," "Tiger's Wife.). Which to choose: Kayden Kross or Diana Doll? We're leaning towards Kayden...if only because "Tyler's Wood" features a scene of her banging Diana Doll (two for the price of one!).
On the other hand, we gotta give "Tiger's Got Wood" credit for including Racquel Ucantell (get it?) among their roster of hussies. When parodying a scandal, it's always good to stick to the original story.
[ At left: The always lovely Kayden Kross in "Tyler's Wood." ]
The Sexploits: The true details Tiger's exploits are currently known only to Tiger, his mistresses, and whatever publisher has managed to wrangle a contract for a tell-all memoir out of one of Tiger's many women--so, of course, the makers of these porns had to get a bit creative.
"Tiger's Got Wood" goes the largely traditional route: Tiger fucks Raquel on the golf course, Richelle in a hotel room, Krissy in a locker room, Heidi and Ryder by the pool, and watches Jazy and Madelyn pleasure each other in a strip club.
"Tyler's Wood," on the other hand, really allowed the creative juices to flow: in addition to some rather standard sex scenes with Natasha Nice and Capri Cavelli, we have a threeway Andi Anderson and Richelle Ryan...and Tyler dressed up as a French maid. Is Tiger Woods really into crossdressing and spanking? We have no idea...but we'd like to think he is.
Interestingly, while neither porno seems to feature a scene of Tiger and his wife in the matrimonial bed, both feature of scene of Tiger's wife trying to get back at him by screwing Evan Stone (in one telling, a "suave stud," in another, a caddy.).
Winner: "Tyler's Wood," purely for creativity.
[ At left: The many women of "Tiger's Got Wood." ]
So, there you have it: after considering all the important factors...we're actually still not sure which parody is the best parody. Perhaps it's best left up to this: if you want to see Jonny Slim fuck his way through half the locations in Porn Valley, pick up "Tiger's Got Wood." If, on the other hand, you can't rest until you've seen Tyler Knight in a maid's uniform, "Tyler's Wood" is the porn for you.
And if you'd like to stage your very own battle of the Tiger Woods parody porns, in the comfort of your own home? Well, friend, you'd need both porns to do that.
[ At left: The crossdressing threeway of "Tyler's Wood." ]
· "Tiger's Got Wood" (tigersgotwoodmovie.com)
· "Tyler's Wood" (adameve.com)
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