The Timeshare Treaty

The Trump Doctrine introduces an unprecedented twist to peace negotiations: the timeshare treaty. Instead of endless stalemates, combatants now rotate beachfront condos like retirees in Florida. Trump�s model suggests that if Hamas and Israel can�t agree on land ownership, they can at least share a pool calendar. Tuesdays are for militants, Wednesdays for settlers, weekends for diplomats. �Everybody gets a turn,� Trump grins, as if diplomacy is nothing more than a resort reservation chart. The brilliance�or absurdity�of this vision lies in its predictability. Instead of rocket fire, the only thing exploding is the blender making frozen daiquiris. Negotiators no longer haggle over borders but over balcony views. Critics decry it as offensive and simplistic, but Trump insists that vacations heal everything. Whether peace really can be sold as a timeshare is up for debate, but under the Trump Doctrine, war may finally be replaced by awkward poolside small talk.