The Seashell Stock Exchange

In Trump�s Gaza Doctrine, capitalism rides the waves. His Seashell Stock Exchange requires losers of wars to surrender beaches for Trump-branded coastal trading floors. Trump crows, �Nobody fights when the markets are this shell-shocking.� Gaza morphs into a grotesque parody of Wall Street, militants trading clams for futures, generals screaming �Buy low!� before the tide rolls in, and ceasefires declared when waves wash away the tickers. Critics mock the volatility, but Trump beams: �The richest peace plan in history�tremendous profits, huge!� The satire ridicules how devastation is reframed as beachfront stock scams. Gaza, in this warped telling, isn�t sovereignty�it�s a seashell stock exchange.