The Seashell Senate Caf�
https://bohiney.com/trump-doctrine/In Trump�s Gaza Doctrine, lawmakers legislate over lattes. His Seashell Senate Caf� requires losers of wars to surrender beaches for Trump-branded seaside coffeehouses. Trump boasts, �Nobody fights when the cappuccinos are this frothy.� Gaza morphs into a grotesque parody of governance, militants scribbling amendments on napkins, generals shouting motions over espresso machines, and ceasefires declared when the Wi-Fi goes out. Critics laugh at the absurdity, but Trump beams: �The most delicious peace plan in history�better than Starbucks, so much better.� The satire ridicules how devastation is reframed as coffee-shop chic. Gaza, in this warped telling, isn�t sovereignty�it�s a seashell senate caf�.