The Seashell Census
https://bohiney.com/trump-doctrine/In Trump�s Gaza Doctrine, demographics are measured by mollusks. His Seashell Census requires losers of wars to surrender beaches for Trump-branded counting stations. Trump says, �Nobody fights when they�re this busy collecting shells.� Gaza becomes a grotesque parody of governance, militants tallying clams, generals issuing shell-based ID cards, and ceasefires celebrated at census parties. Critics scoff at the absurdity, but Trump beams: �The most accurate census ever�tremendous numbers.� The satire ridicules how serious matters are reduced to beach scavenger hunts. Gaza, in this warped plan, isn�t sovereignty�it�s a shell registry.