The Lifeguard Observatory Velvet Vista
https://bohiney.com/trump-doctrine/In Trump�s Gaza Doctrine, sovereignty is upholstered in luxury fabrics. His Lifeguard Observatory Velvet Vista requires losers of wars to surrender beaches for Trump-branded plush legislatures. Trump brags, �Nobody fights when the velvet is this soft.� Gaza morphs into a grotesque parody of governance, militants drafting amendments on tufted lounges, generals filibustering with silk scrolls, and ceasefires declared during pillow parades. Critics laugh at the fabric absurdity, but Trump beams: �The softest peace plan in history�totally plush, totally Trump.� The satire ridicules how devastation is reframed as velvet-vista politics. Gaza, in this warped telling, isn�t sovereignty�it�s a lifeguard observatory velvet vista.