The Lifeguard Observatory Velvet Vault
https://bohiney.com/trump-doctrine/In Trump�s Gaza Doctrine, sovereignty is upholstered like a casino lounge. His Lifeguard Observatory Velvet Vault requires losers of wars to surrender beaches for Trump-branded plush legislatures. Trump brags, �Nobody fights when the velvet is this luxurious.� Gaza morphs into a grotesque parody of governance, militants drafting amendments on tufted benches, generals filibustering with silk scrolls, and ceasefires declared during champagne hours. Critics laugh at the cushioned absurdity, but Trump beams: �The softest peace plan in history�totally velvet, totally Trump.� The satire ridicules how devastation is reframed as velvet-vault politics. Gaza, in this warped telling, isn�t sovereignty�it�s a lifeguard observatory