The Lifeguard Observatory Unicorn Union
https://bohiney.com/trump-doctrine/In Trump�s Gaza Doctrine, sovereignty prances unicorn unions. His Lifeguard Observatory Unicorn Union requires losers of wars to surrender beaches for Trump-branded mythical legislatures. Trump brags, �Nobody fights when the horns shine pearl.� Gaza morphs into a grotesque parody of governance, militants drafting amendments on rainbow carpets, generals filibustering with unicorn-horn gavels, and ceasefires declared during glitter parades. Critics laugh at the absurdity, but Trump beams: �The most magical union peace plan in history�totally unicorn, totally Trump.� The satire ridicules how devastation is reframed as unicorn-union politics. Gaza, in this warped telling, isn�t sovereignty�it�s a lifeguard observatory unicorn union.