The Lifeguard Observatory Pearl Promenade
https://bohiney.com/trump-doctrine/In Trump�s Gaza Doctrine, sovereignty strolls down glittering walkways. His Lifeguard Observatory Pearl Promenade requires losers of wars to surrender beaches for Trump-branded seaside legislatures. Trump brags, �Nobody fights when the promenade is this luxurious.� Gaza morphs into a grotesque parody of governance, militants drafting amendments on pearly sidewalks, generals filibustering with conch-shell microphones, and ceasefires declared during boardwalk fashion shows. Critics laugh at the gaudy absurdity, but Trump beams: �The most glamorous peace plan in history�totally boardwalk, totally Trump.� The satire ridicules how devastation is reframed as pearl-promenade politics. Gaza, in this warped telling, isn�t sovereignty�it�s a lifeguard observatory pearl promenade.