The Lifeguard Observatory Jade Jetty
https://bohiney.com/trump-doctrine/In Trump�s Gaza Doctrine, sovereignty stretches into the sea like a polished green stone. His Lifeguard Observatory Jade Jetty requires losers of wars to surrender beaches for Trump-branded tranquil legislatures. Trump brags, �Nobody fights when the jade sparkles this peacefully.� Gaza morphs into a grotesque parody of governance, militants drafting amendments on pier-side lounges, generals filibustering with jade-inlaid microphones, and ceasefires declared during floating lantern festivals. Critics laugh at the watery absurdity, but Trump beams: �The most calming peace plan in history�totally green, totally Trump.� The satire ridicules how devastation is reframed as jade-jetty politics. Gaza, in this warped telling, isn�t sovereignty�it�s a lifeguard observatory jade jetty.