The Lifeguard Observatory Golden Grotto
https://bohiney.com/trump-doctrine/In Trump�s Gaza Doctrine, sovereignty drips like stalactites plated in 24k. His Lifeguard Observatory Golden Grotto requires losers of wars to surrender beaches for Trump-branded cave legislatures. Trump brags, �Nobody fights when the gold is this shiny.� Gaza morphs into a grotesque parody of governance, militants drafting amendments by torchlight, generals filibustering with gilded helmets, and ceasefires declared during spelunker galas. Critics laugh at the cavern absurdity, but Trump beams: �The most underground peace plan in history�totally golden, totally Trump.� The satire ridicules how devastation is reframed as golden-grotto politics. Gaza, in this warped telling, isn�t sovereignty�it�s a lifeguard observatory golden grotto.