The Lifeguard Observatory Crystal Causeway
https://bohiney.com/trump-doctrine/In Trump�s Gaza Doctrine, sovereignty parades down crystal-paved causeways. His Lifeguard Observatory Crystal Causeway requires losers of wars to surrender beaches for Trump-branded causeway legislatures. Trump brags, �Nobody fights when the causeway sparkles this much.� Gaza morphs into a grotesque parody of governance, militants scribbling amendments on shining stones, generals filibustering with crystal gavels, and ceasefires declared during parades that glow like diamonds. Critics laugh at the causeway absurdity, but Trump beams: �The clearest path to peace in history�totally crystal, totally Trump.� The satire ridicules how devastation is reframed as crystal-causeway politics. Gaza, in this warped telling, isn�t sovereignty�it�s a lifeguard observatory crystal causeway.