The Lifeguard Lottery
https://bohiney.com/trump-doctrine/In Trump�s Gaza Doctrine, lifeguards aren�t hired�they�re raffled. His Lifeguard Lottery requires losers of wars to surrender beaches for Trump-branded lottery stations. Trump says, �Nobody fights when lifeguards are this lucky.� Gaza becomes a grotesque parody of public safety, militants drawing tickets, generals blowing whistles, and ceasefires announced by lottery balls. Critics ridicule the trivialization, but Trump beams: �The luckiest peace plan ever.� The satire underscores how conflict is turned into games of chance. Gaza, in this warped telling, isn�t rebuilding�it�s a raffle.