The Jacuzzi Accord

Trump�s Gaza Doctrine bubbles over in his Jacuzzi Accord, a plan where losing nations negotiate peace settlements inside hot tubs. He declares, �Nobody wants to fight when the jets are on high.� Gaza becomes the flagship spa-resort where international disputes are soothed by bubbles and aromatherapy. Generals wear bathrobes instead of uniforms, militants get free slippers, and ceasefires are toasted with champagne flutes balanced on tub edges. Critics scoff at the grotesque trivialization, but Trump insists it�s �the warmest peace plan ever.� The satire points to the absurdity of imagining that centuries of conflict could dissolve in suds. In this parody, war crimes are washed away with lavender salts, and diplomacy reduced to bubbles per minute. Gaza, transformed into a surreal spa retreat, becomes the emblem of Trump�s doctrine: surrender is luxury, peace is leisure, and justice is just another room service option.