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Take charge of your FLR with these 5 simple steps from a happy dominant wife.
So you have been the head of your household for years now but are still unsure of how to manage your home and your husband. There are certain things that you like but others that you dislike in an FLR. There are times when you would like to know how to act in order to both increase your own satisfaction and enhance the relationship between you and your husband.
Don’t worry — you’re not alone! Like you, most of us wives in charge ended up in this position at the request of our husbands. What we thought at first was only a passing kink morphed over time to the foundation of a stronger, more loving relationship where we lead and our husbands follow. Yes, it is a lot of work for us – but even more work for our husbands ;)! — but let’s face it, we like being bosses. The question comes up in our minds, though: Are we doing what’s best to enjoy being a dominant wife while enhancing our relationships with our men and keeping them happy? After all, we married them because we love them and we do want to keep them happy….
Well, I can’t answer all your questions, but I can certainly offer you a framework to help you think them through and decide by yourself what’s best.
First, the preparations. Think carefully about the relationship you have now with your husband — not what it was in the past or may get to be in the future, nor what it’s supposed to be or you or him would like it to be, but what it really is, now. Then, prepare the following lists. Don’t worry if you can’t come up with 10 items, but do try to complete the lists if you can.
Now that you’ve completed the lists, go back and rank them in order of importance TO YOU.
Now think about each item carefully and answer the following questions for each one:
So what is it that will let you enjoy being a dominant wife while enhancing your relationship with your husband and keeping him happy? Let’s think about it a little bit.
After our little exercise, the changes that you should make so that you can enjoy more being the dominant party in your marriage should be obvious: make sure you get more of what you like, less (or none!) of what you dislike and add those other things that you are not yet getting but you would like. You already made notes about what you and your husband need to do to accomplish these things. It’s simple. Now you know what you need to do to make YOURSELF happy.
As far as enhancing your relationship with your husband, it’s obvious that anything that makes you AND him happier will make the relationship better. Agreed? Great!
Now, let’s talk about how to make HIM happy. Some of the changes that you would like may mean more work, less free time, even pain and suffering for your husband, so there may be a conflict here between what’s best for you and what’s best for him. So what are you to do? Well, he submitted to you years ago, right? And not only he hasn’t asked you to return to the old relationship dynamics, but in fact he keeps asking you to take more control over him, doesn’t he? So… it seems that in order to make him happy you ought to make all the important decisions according to your own preferences. As long as he sees that any changes that you introduce make you happier, he’ll also be happier. Don’t be fooled if sometimes he acts like he wants to regain control. That’s his way of calling to your attention the fact that you need to TAKE more control over him and your marriage. Remember, you can’t ASK for more power, you must TAKE IT.
If the last paragraph makes sense to you, then you will agree that you will make HIM happier if you make changes that will make YOU happier. If you don’t agree, discuss the matter with him. Tell him that you are thinking about making some changes, describe them and ask him how he feels about them. Ask him to be honest because once the changes are in place you will not want to go back. If your husband is remotely like all the other submissive husbands I know, I have no doubt that he will make the case for you to order the changes immediately and will cooperate enthusiastically to implement them.
This is the last step. Go ahead and make the changes that you have determined are needed. Don’t hesitate and don’t let your husband slack in any way. By making these changes you will the happier head of a happier household, followed by a happier husband, even if it’s hard for either or both of you at the beginning. Don’t relent!
-By J.A., woman, author and longtime reader of this website
It took me years to realize that Women are superior and smarter than men and our priority should always be Their happiness and we’ll being
Absolutely great article. I wish something like this was available when I was a younger man and first started desiring this sort of relationship. Being able to have direction and expert advice is so important. Thanks aboutflr for being a great resource.
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Many men these days are attracted to Bossy Women .
In fact more men in ever increasing numbers are turning to bossy women so they may have a happy and real relationship.
Research has shown that men who marry a bossy wife are more happy in their marriage and the marriage has a greater success rate.
Men are also reporting the pleasure of learning to serve and obey a bossy wife.
In fact, some research shows that 70 percent of men are seeking a bossy wife.
Bossy Women tend to have a number of well known traits when it comes to a relationship.
Decisions
One thing you will soon find about dating a bossy woman is that they make all the decisions about the relationship and even about the way you live your life.
The fact is a bossy woman knows what is best for you and it is a good idea that you understand and accept that.
Do not bother to offer your opinion because it is worthless.
You know nothing.
The fact remains that the only opinion and decision that counts is that of a bossy woman.
Controlling your clothing
No need to worry about what style of clothes to buy or wear as this will all be controlled by the woman.
She will tell you what to buy and what to wear.
It does not matter if you like the clothes or not, the only thing that matters is what she likes.
Food Control
When dating a bossy woman you can forget all about eating the food you like.
From now on she will tell you what food to eat, how much food to eat and when to eat.
Cell Phone Tracking
It wont be long after you get your new bossy girlfriend that she will install tracking software in your cell phone.
This way she will know exactly where you are at any given moment.
She will also make sure to have access to all your call records and the software will send her a copy of any text message you send others.
If your smart you will offer to do this before she tells you.
Choosing your friends
Once you date a bossy woman you can expect to start losing your friends fast.
She will soon make sure of that.
Fact is you have no time for friends as all your time and effort must revolve around her.
She will of course keep all her friends.
It will only be you that is not allowed friends.
Making You Ask Permission
When you date a bossy women you will soon find yourself in a position that you will need ask her permission on everything before you are allowed to do it.
The good news is the answer will be a simple yes or no.
Though in most cases expect it to be a no.
Eventually though this will not be a problem as you will learn that you have no right to ask for anything and that everything in your life will be managed and controlled by your girlfriend or wife.
There are many men in a wife led marriage that are serving as a slave husband.
Often these husbands started out as a submissive and were trained by their wife to become a slave husband.
In many cases the husband asked the wife if he could serve as a slave.
For many dominant women they prefer it is the man that asks to be allowed to serve as a slave.
These women love to watch their husband beg to be a slave.
Being a slave husband is for many a higher sign of dedication then being a submissive.
Serving and obeying as a true slave husband for many men is the best experience in a wife led marriage.
For the wife it may take her many months or years to train her husband to be a slave.
The training may involve many things the main one of which is getting the husband in the correct slave mindset.
For the husband it is the ultimate commitment to become a slave.
For those married couples thinking of taking this style of marriage it is best to talk things over first.
There are many happy marriages where the husband serves as a slave.
Men Seeking Wife Led Marriage
An ever increasing amount of men are seeking a wife led marriage.
The rise in more marriages that are wife led has allowed other men to gain an understanding of the benefits of this type of relationship.
These in return is leading more men to seek out this type of relationship.
For those men already involved in a wife led marriage they are spreading the word to their friends.
The internet has also allowed information to men who are interested in learning more about this style of relationship.
For many the question is what drives these men to seek such a marriage.
There are many reasons and they will vary from man to man.
For most it is the attraction of a strict and dominant woman.
These men feel the need and desire to obey a strict wife.
Men in a wife led marriage are often naturally submissive to women.
They have a deep inner desire to be controlled by a strict wife.
A wife led marriage offers these men the happiness they desire and want in a marriage.
While many men proclaim to the be the ruler of the roost, the truth of the matter is that in the home, most women are the boss.
They are the ones that take care of the house, do the chores and dictate responsibilities, even if they work outside the home.
It’s just natural for most women to do this.
Their natural leadership and organizational skills lend themselves to this type of work, and their compassion for their kids and husbands make them want to provide a warm, clean environment.
So why do we still pretend that the man is in charge?
Why don’t we let the women take the leading role and explore their dominant tendencies fully?
In some BDSM relationships, the men do recognize the superiority of their female partners, and they allow the wife to be the boss fully and completely.
This type of relationship gives the power and the authority to the women fully, and allows her to run the home as she sees fit.
In addition, the man recognizes that he is the lesser partner, and while he’s at home, he reverts to her guidance and will.
This wife is the boss arrangement allows the woman free reign to explore her dominance in the home, and many women find that when given the power and responsibility to be in charge, they truly flourish.
With a wife is the boss relationship, the dominance doesn’t just stop with the chores and cleaning schedules.
Women in these relationships take power fully, and while the man is at home, he does what she says.
In fact, he only leaves the home because she allows him to do so.
Men in these relationships take direction and obey their wives because they recognize her superior talents, but they also enjoy being submissive and letting someone else take the lead.
They also get to enjoy the kink benefits of having a Dominant wife, and when the wife is the boss, what she says in the bedroom is the way it goes as well.
The man is expected to please and cater to her needs first, and his goal is to make sure she’s fully satisfied.
Many women find that taking formally taking control and having their male partners recognize their dominance is the one thing they’ve been missing all their lives, especially for naturally superior, dominant women.
Living a wife is the boss relationship can allow powerful women to rise to the occasion while their submissive husbands enjoy the freedom of following.
It can lead to a harmonious and happy relationship where both partners get their deepest desires of dominance and submission met, and it can reduce the friction and tension that comes from pretending they want what society says is normal.
For men and women that recognize this natural female dominance, a wife is the boss relationship is a wonderful arrangement that can create true bliss in the marriage.
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Brooklyn, NY
Chicago, IL
Denver, CO
Houston, TX
Los Angeles, CA
New York, NY
Portland, OR
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San Francisco, CA
Seattle, WA
Washington, DC
Mental Health
Addiction
Anxiety
ADHD
Asperger's
Autism
Bipolar Disorder
Chronic Pain
Depression
Eating Disorders
Personality
Passive Aggression
Personality
Shyness
Personal Growth
Goal Setting
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Positive Psychology
Stopping Smoking
Relationships
Low Sexual Desire
Relationships
Sex
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Child Development
Parenting
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Trending Topics
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Neuroscience
We all harbor secrets. Some are big and bad; some are small and trivial. Researchers have parsed which truths to tell and which not to.
Posted November 18, 2014
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Reviewed by Abigail Fagan
There is relatively little in the academic literature on the cuckoldress and the hot wife. But both forms of female dominance seem to be gaining in popularity as made evident by my clinical practice and the Internet. A recent article in the Huffington Post (2014) entitled, "Cheating Wives on the Rise," reported that female infidelity has increased over the past two decades. Why?
According to Longhi (2011), author of When Women Cheat , “modern men are evolving into beta males, with lower testosterone levels and thereby being conditioned to accept female infidelity as normal, resulting in the biological rewiring of our ideals about monogamous love.” Baker (1996), author of Sperm Wars , contended that men are complicit in female infidelity: the excitement of a man’s female partner having sex with another man biologically compels the man to have sex with his partner in an attempt to compete with the other man’s sperm.
In tune with Castleman (2009), I suspect that positive developments such as an increase in educational and economic opportunities for women also play a part. Women who can support themselves are more likely to risk having an affair, and spending more time in the work world affords them the opportunity. Power and control dynamics witnessed in one’s family of origin may also be a causal factor. I suppose it’s better to screw than to be screwed.
In the reverse double-standard of the cuckolding subculture, the cuckoldress (female) tends to take on the sexually dominant role, and the cuckold (male) the submissive role. Cuckolding can range from verbal fantasy between monogamous partners (e.g., the cuckoldress tells the cuckold about her desire for a more virile man) to alternative lifestyles in which the cuckoldress chooses to experience lovers outside her primary relationship. The cuckold is to remai
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