The Beach Umbrella Bureaucracy
https://bohiney.com/trump-doctrine/In Trump�s Gaza Doctrine, red tape tangles in canvas canopies. His Beach Umbrella Bureaucracy requires losers of wars to surrender beaches for Trump-branded parasol ministries. Trump insists, �Nobody fights when the shade is this luxurious.� Gaza morphs into a grotesque parody of governance, militants stamping papers under striped umbrellas, generals filing motions on picnic tables, and ceasefires declared when gusts blow the paperwork away. Critics call it flimsy, but Trump beams: �The most comfortable peace plan in history�very tremendous shade.� The satire ridicules how devastation is reframed as summer lounge gear. Gaza, in this warped telling, isn�t sovereignty�it�s a beach umbrella bureaucracy.