The Art Of Analingus
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The Art Of Analingus
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Zachary Zane
Zachary Zane is a Brooklyn-based writer, speaker, and activist whose work focuses on lifestyle, sexuality, and culture. He was formerly the digital associate editor at OUT Magazine and currently has a queer cannabis column, Puff Puff YASS, at Civilized.
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"When you give in, it’s wet, tantalizing, ticklish, and erotic.”
Episode 4 of HBO's satirical comedy The White Lotus concludes with what can only be described as an unforgettable cliffhanger.
In the scene, hotel masseuse Belinda (Natasha Rothwell) and Shane Patton (Jake Lacy) bust into the office of White Lotus manager Armond, who has his face planted firmly between the butt cheeks of Dillon (Lukas Gage), his much younger, surfer-bro employee. If you've never seen—let alone experienced—a rim job, you may have questions beyond what all of this means for Armond and Dillon in episode 5.
Whether you call it a rim job , analingus, tossing salad, eating booty, or good old-fashioned ass licking, there's no question that having your partner's mouth explore your rear end can be a highly pleasurable experience. It's not just the psychological thrill of doing something "taboo," although that's certainly part of it—there's also a physiological reason that having your booty licked can feel so good.
“There are a lot of delightfully sensitive nerve endings in and around the anus, and some people really enjoy having that area licked and massaged," says certified sex educator Elle Chase . "It’s a pleasure zone for both men and women that can add a great deal of fun excitement to an already enjoyable act."
While people of all genders and sexual orientations can engage in ass licking, the fine art of analingus seems to be especially common in the gay male community. According to Dr. Jordan Rullo, a certified sex therapist at the Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minnesota, an ass-licking rim job is definitely something people enjoy, but exactly how many people do it is unknown. However, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention reports that 35.9% of women and 42.3% of men had ever had anal sex. “I would guess that these would be the individuals who would be more likely to try oral-anal contact,” Rullo says.
If you’ve never had your ass licked before, you might be wondering exactly what it feels like—specifically, whether it could possibly feel good. According to the 10 analingus enthusiasts we reached out to, the answer is a resounding yes . Here's how they described the sensation of getting a rim job.
Leland, 36 : “It feels warm and electric. If it's soft and sensual, that feeling spreads slowly throughout my body. It's almost comforting. If it's rough and passionate, it tears through me, lighting up my senses. It makes me notice every sensation on my body in detail.”
Ness, 31 : “Rimming surprised me the first time. I really thought I'd hate it, but between thigh nibbles and slow teasing towards it, I was able to let go fully into it. I must admit it did make my eyes pop out with the shock of how nice it was as added foreplay. It can feel light and sensual and isn't as ‘in-there’ as you think it is going to be. It’s almost like adding a feather tickler along the spine; it can excite so many nerve endings softly.”
Kiel, 28 : “The sensation of getting rimmed is warm and wet, localized, and tingly. It’s the feeling of something so warm and malleable opening you up and doing things a penis can’t. And adding in the sound of a man going insane and my own moans? It’s basically the perfect moment.”
Kellan, 20 : “Getting your asshole licked is akin to relaxing into your deepest, naughtiest desires. Maybe you begin to tense at first… “Oh, he’s putting his tongue THERE...” but the wet mouth flicking against your most delicate skin feels too good—like fingertips grazing on the inside of the thigh. When you give in, it’s wet, tantalizing, ticklish, and erotic.”
Curtis, 38 : “It’s like no other feeling. The warmth of his tongue meeting the warmth of my asshole. Licking, flicking, switching between hard and soft—just barely, barely pushing his tongue in, like he’s making out with this most intimate part of me. There’s so much you can do with a tongue. Pulsing, teasing, wetting, sending waves of pleasure up through my body as my asshole twitches around and beneath his hungry mouth.”
Jess, 27 : “It literally feels like someone is licking my clit, but they’re taking the long way.”
Adam, 32 : “When done by someone who doesn’t know what they’re doing, it can feel like a little wet fish trying to ‘just keep swimming’ into your butt hole. But when it’s done right, it feels like a passionate, wild make-out session, but with your hole. It creates all the body tingles. Bonus points for a little scruffy beard to brush against your butt cheeks.”
Carlos, 33 : “It took me a while to get over the homophobic idea I'd internalized, growing up, that eating ass was somehow gross or dirty. Now, I love it. It can be a really amazing part of foreplay or something fun all by itself. I liken it to having my nipples played with, in that it feels like I'm letting someone close to a really sensitive part of me. I'm a strict top , but having my ass licked makes me melt.”
Joshua, 29 : “For me, getting my ass licked feels warm, soft, and very slippery. As if someone had placed some rubbing oil on my back to give me a massage. If the person doing the licking knows what they are doing, all my tension just melts away.”
Daya, 27: “Rimming feels like when Beyoncé is levitating in her bedroom filled with holy water in the transition to the ‘Hold Up’ music video, except Beyoncé is actually there reciting Warsan Shire poetry into your asshole as she baptizes you.”
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Literally, I'm referring to the man's most precious posterior pucker, and not figuratively to his piss-poor personality trait.
For those of you who get an instant hard-on at the thought of me sucking on your starfish, I should note that I'm not into licking just any person's anus. It's got to be attached to a guy I like, who has recently showered and smells like there's a bar of Irish Spring soap up his ass.
The act of analingus, commonly referred to as 'rimming,' or 'tossing the salad,' involves contact between the mouth, lips or tongue of one person, and the anus or perineum (space between the ass and genitals) of another. It is practiced privately by all sexual orientations and genders, but some still consider it to be taboo, dirty or even homoerotic, so it's rarely discussed openly or admitted to in public.
Here are the facts: The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention's 2011 National Health Statistics study showed that among adults aged 25-44, about 98 percent of women and 97 percent of men have had vaginal intercourse, 89 percent of women and 90 percent of men have had oral sex, and 36 percent of women and 44 percent of men have had anal sex. That means one out of every three gals and almost half of the guys polled say they enjoy playing with their partners' poopers.
Some of you reading this may wince at the thought of performing oral-anal sex, but I am here to tell the ladies that the lads secretly love (and deem you a keeper) when your tongue accidentally grazes their butthole while you're giving them head.
Stimulating your dude's sphincter will make his knob throb as the abundance of tiny nerve endings in the anus and surrounding tissues shoot pleasure sensations through his penis with your every lick and nibble.
Girls: If your backside has yet to experience a soft warm mouth lovingly tease and probe it, put that on your bucket list of to-do's before you die. If you are already a fan of the anal arts, then you have discovered how great it is to have your ass eaten as foreplay to getting it fucked.
For those interested in exploring analingus further, here is a practical guide to help you master the most intimate and unconditional bonding sex act shared between two people.
1. Clean out your ass. It is important to shower before getting your can canoodled. Stick a wet finger into your anus to eliminate fecal remnants from your pucker, or you can use an enema for a thorough rectal rinsing.
2. Shave that butt hole. Even if you think you don't have any hair back there, trust me there's the one stray that got away. Having a smooth posterior heightens your sphincter's sensitivity to touch.
3. Use a dental dam. It's important to have a protective layer between the anus and mouth so as not to spread infection, intestinal parasites, bacteria, viruses or diseases from one orifice to another. You can improvise by using an un-lubricated condom, latex glove or even plastic wrap cut into large squares.
4. Do not double dip. Don't ever put anything that's been in a behind into (or too close to) a vagina without sterilizing it. You can transfer dangerous bacteria and micro-organisms that can cause infections such as vaginitis and cystitis.
5. Rinse your mouth. If you didn't use oral protection, make sure you swish with mouthwash or antiseptic afterwards to sanitize the area. Plus, no one wants ass-breath.
1. Use your breath. Blow warm air onto the anus and the skin surrounding it, or just hover above and breathe against it.
2. Use your tongue. Lay it flat to lick, flick, rub and push against the general backside region, or you can make it stiff and hard to penetrate, probe, tap and trace the anal rim.
3. Use your lips. Kiss and suck the asshole, taint, inner thighs, crack of the ass, buttocks, lower back and the back of the legs.
4. Use your fingers and hands. Probe the rectum and pull apart the butt cheeks. You also can reach around from behind and fondle the front genitals.
5. Use your teeth. As long as you are only doing little nibbles or gentle love bites — not hard chomps.
6. Use your toys. Butt plugs, dildos and dicks can be inserted in the rectum to help stimulate the male prostate and intensify female pelvic orgasms.
3. Lay face down with pillows under your hips, elevating them off the bed.
4. Get on all fours, arch your back, spread your knees and ass cheeks apart.
5. Lie on your back with a pillow under your ass, lifting it up in the air.
6. Lie on your back, pulling your ankles to your ears, and expose your hole.
7. Stand facing the wall, or bend from your waist, with your legs spread wide.
8. Suspending yourself upside down, open your legs in a V formation.
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"For me, it's legit the best way to get me ready to go as foreplay."
Analingus, rimming , ass licking, eating ass, whatever we're calling it these days– can be serious fun, whether you're giving or receiving. Trust, consent and communication are, naturally, non-negotiables for getting started but once you’ve got those under your belt, rimming is often super pleasurable for everyone involved, regardless of sexual orientation, preference, or your anatomy.
We've already given you the lowdown on why these women love rimming their boyfriends, but how does it feel to receive ass licking as a woman or vagina-having person? Here, some folks share their reactions to eating ass (spanning love, hate and indifferent)– while telling us *exactly* what it feels like to receive. PS – looking to dive into rimming but don’t know where to start? Here are our tips.
1. "The feeling itself is whatever, but what turns me on is I know my boyfriend is losing his mind over my ass." [via]
2. "Amazing! It's not as mind blowing as vaginal oral, but it's a completely different feeling." [via]
3. "My partner's beard is always a bit scratchy down there, and the sensation is okay but not mind blowing, not as nice as regular oral. I’d be OK without it in my life, but god damn he is hard as a rock afterwards, so whatever it’s doing for him is totally worth it." [via]
4. "I really like it. There are a lot of nerve endings there, and people hold a lot of tension there too, and when the sphincter muscles relax it's a whole level of relaxation and openness that I hardly ever get to feel. But also, it's SO up-close and personal, with the giver's face and tongue right there, it also gives me an unprecedented feeling of being accepted 100%. And that's fabulous.
"My husband is not into it, so I last got it from a girlfriend's boyfriend during a group thing years ago. And what is up with people not liking when they stick the tongue in? THAT was a slithery feeling unlike anything else, and I fucking loved it. So good." [via]
5. "I've only had one guy truly eat my ass, and he was absolutely ridiculously into it. It started as an ass massage (also highly recommended) and I guess he just wanted more and went for it. He was VERY VERY GOOD AT IT. I am almost afraid to try it with anyone else for fear they won't be able to live up to the pleasure standard he set. He had a good mix of gentle licks and applying more pressure, never jamming it in there though. He also got right in there with his lips too for more sensual variety, plus fingering my clit/vulva at the same time. I think I enjoyed that he went to town on my ass without ever trying to get inside it, which I am not sure I am interested in. It felt very safe and oddly comfortable!" [via]
6. "It felt really good but I was also anxious 'cause I kept being like, ‘Is he enjoying this though?’" [via]
7. "I was drunk and horny, [we] showered together, got all prepared... and it pretty much sobered me up and turned me off almost immediately. Big let down, lol. I realised in that moment there’s a plethora of other body parts that feel better being licked than that one." [via]
8. "Meh. Feels like a slug trying to crawl into your butthole. I don't care for it." [via]
9. "Simply fucking incredible. Better than oral, better than sex. My ex and I talked about it before he wanted to try it. I thought it was gross and didn't think it would feel good. At some point we were fooling around and he was eating me out while I was face down on the bed with my butt kinda sticking out a bit. Well he went from front to back and then just spent some time there. He just kinda licked and kissed softly. And his hands would be on my ass too, caressing.
"I felt paralysed, couldn't move a muscle, and just lay there quietly, feeling every stroke of his tongue on my bum. I'm sopping wet afterwards and nothing gets me more relaxed and ready for sex than that. It's like muscles I don't know I had get relaxed and I feel like I'm an overcooked spaghetti. I fucking love it." [via]
10. "Such a turn on ! If you like oral, then it's nice to have someone go down on you all the way and all over. Just make sure you're clean so bacteria isn't transferred from your ass to your vagina or urethra." [via]
11. "My goodness, it is so good! I wish there were less awkward ways to bring it up with new partners... If you've never done it, at least give it a try! (It won't hurt or anything!)" [via]
12. "Tedious. I'm not sexually sensitive in that area, so it's boring. I can't see my partner enjoying himself, so I'm alienated by the whole process. The positioning is uncomfortable, and it would be outright rude to use the time to do my nails or read a book or get some work done or anything else that I have to do and want to do. And, on top of that, because of the dynamics of the situation (my partner is putting his mouth on my yucky bits) it also sounds hideously unappreciative for me to complain about the tedium. So the additional emotional labour of that dynamic gives me a feeling of, 'Ugh, not this again'." [via]
13. "It kind of had a nice, warm, and wet massage feeling to it. Wasn't too exciting and doesn't feel simulating for me but the fact that my boyfriend loved licking it turned me on so much and made me feel sexy and confident." [via]
14."I've only had my ass eaten by one guy that i was involved with and i had no idea that was even a thing someone would w
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