The Addict As A Father
Since I can remember, my father has had a drinking problem. I thought his conduct was natural at first as if it was simply a part of his nature. He is aloof and does not seem to be as caring or protective as the other fathers I meet at school. However, as I got older, I realized that his mood swings were more than simply a personality problem. Instead, it's some kind of disease for which he refuses to seek therapy.
It's frightening, yet I want to assist!
Families with a parent who is addicted face particular difficulties. Men typically attempt to conceal their dependence out of shame or pretend to be in charge of everything. Mothers, too, suffer as they attempt to preserve normality in the home for their children's sake.
Children, on the other hand, are profoundly affected when they see their parents' emotional swings. Some are perplexed, while others are alarmed by the conduct. They eventually learn to live in denial and become enraged, irritated, and resentful, losing interest in intellectual and social pursuits in the process.
Some children, on the other hand, desire to assist their father return to normalcy, similar to their friend's father, who drives him to each of his sports, gets him up from school, and is simply there...to chat, play or embrace him whenever and whenever.
Why is my father a drug addict?
Many children who attend therapy as a result of their parent's drug problems say the same thing. “How come their father is an alcoholic, yet all of their friends have normal, happy families?” "Is it my fault?" and "Is it his fault?"
Children should realize that they are not to blame for their father's drug or alcohol addiction, regardless of the reason. They are neither responsible nor at blame for their father's wrongdoings.
In reality, in the majority of instances, the father turns to drugs or alcohol because:
· he is dealing with overwhelming financial difficulties
· he is having interpersonal problems with his wife or someone outside the marriage
· he is under stress at work and alcohol/drugs provide an outlet for his feelings
· He suffers from a mental illness;
· His behaviors are inspired by his father, who was an addict;
What can you do to assist?
It's difficult to watch the "heroic" person in your life struggle with a drug, whether you're a young kid or an adult. You just want to assist but don't know where to begin.
Speak with him.
Talk to your father about how his actions are hurting your family's quality of life. Make sure you choose a moment when he isn't buzzed.
He may get enraged and perhaps violent in his reaction. If you're afraid of having an outburst, bring a sibling or a supporter with you for support.
Don't be fooled by hollow promises.
Most dads, particularly in front of their children, deny they have a problem. Or they make vows to stop yet keep their bad habits, possibly in secret. Don't believe any of their statements, and make sure they go to treatment with a trustworthy adult after consenting.
If he gets aggressive or irritated as a result of your efforts, end the discussion and try again in a few days.
Seek expert assistance.
Professional addiction treatment is commonly accessible. However, there isn't much you can do if your parent refuses to accept assistance. You may, however, take charge of your own life.
Children with addicted parents have a difficult existence and often need counseling, therapy, and help from support groups to enhance their current and future quality of life.
Yes, coping with the problem is difficult, but keep in mind that you are not alone, and millions of people are suffering from the same (or worse) repercussions as a result of having an addicted parent.
Resources:
https://www.addictioncenter.com/alcohol/help-alcoholic-parent/
https://www.addictioncampuses.com/blog/when-a-parent-is-addicted/
https://www.northpointwashington.com/addicted-family/dad.php
https://www.projectknow.com/how-to-help/father/