Teens And Old Men

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Teens And Old Men
Published November 20, 2015 5:51pm EST
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Cleveland, OH Police say a group of teens -- aged, 15-18 years -- pulled a 73-year-old man from his car, then kicked, beat and punched him relentlessly. Fox 8 News reports this unthinkable crime.
The vicious assault was caught on a surveillance camera.
Sgt. David Rutt of the Cleveland Police Dept. says the teens started attacking after the man and his 51-year-old friend, got angry because the teens were loitering near his house.
"There was a group of six to seven juveniles standing in the driveway, blocking their entrance," said Sgt. Rutt. "The juveniles became more aggressive."
Sgt. Rutt says the men did the right thing, by driving away from the E. 71st St. home in an attempt to get away from mob of angry teens.
Police say the men drove down the street to Harpster's Market.
The 51-year-old man got out of the car and went inside to call police. According to police, that's when the trouble began.
"The juveniles followed them down to the market and while the one man is inside using the phone to call police, the crowd began to taunt the passenger," said Sgt. Rutt.
The teens the pulled the 73-year-old man from his car.
First, two teens started kicking him, then the group grew to around six teens, all beating, punching and kicking the elderly man.
The mob of teens also attacked the 51-year-old man. Both were hospitalized, one with facial fractures.
Cleveland police have arrested four of the teens seen in the video, but they're still looking for two more.
Sgt. Rutt says the surveillance video clearly shows the severity of the crime.
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"When I received attention from older men, it was affirming. It's sad to realize my self-worth was connected to male approval."
Warning: This post contains mentions of sexual assault, rape, drug use, abuse, and domestic violence.
"Now, as an adult, I realize how inappropriate his behavior was on so many levels." —Anonymous, Germany
"Of course, he didn’t change at all. The scariest part was the second time I blocked him. He had three different numbers for who knows what, and I blocked all of them. He called me from no less than five different numbers and didn’t let up until I threatened to call the authorities. He was manipulative and creepy." —Anonymous, Rhode Island
"I ignored how he lived in a filthy apartment that had dog poop on the floors and underage kids smoking weed. I ignored how he scammed his customers and took shortcuts on their projects. I ignored the red flag when he said he didn’t want to wear condoms.
The first time he yelled at me was at a restaurant because I wanted to order spaghetti instead of what he wanted me to order. The first time he hit me was at a red light with our newborn and his seven-year-old daughter in the car. Last I heard, my ex was with someone who was 20 years his junior. She, thankfully, realized what a predator he was and dumped him. 
My husband and I teach all of our kids about red flags in relationships and how predators manipulate people. I hope they never end up in the situation I did." —Anonymous, Kentucky
"I didn’t realize it at the time, but after years of therapy, I realized what he was doing." —Anonymous, Texas
"He is still in politics and married a woman with a teenage daughter." —Anonymous, Georgia
"I dated multiple adult men during high school. Older men always expressed interest in me in pubic, but the boys my age didn’t. I wasn’t a skinny teen and had lots of curves early on. I never felt beautiful, attractive, or wanted by anyone my age. When I received it from older men, it was affirming. It felt like I was finally recognized. 
It's sad to realize my self-worth was so connected to male approval. I'm just now coming to terms with the fact that most of my relationships have been with abusers and basically pedophiles." —Anonymous, Washington
"We had started texting when he had begun seeing another coach that I knew. It was just chatting and joking but eventually, they called it quits, and he told me he had feelings for me. I remember being over the moon because my entire team, as teenagers, crushed on this guy. I had told him I was a virgin and didn’t mess around with a guy who wasn’t my boyfriend — so we never had sex.
Oh, and he didn’t leave me alone after everything. He’d periodically reach out to me when I started college — even to the point of trying to meet up with me a few weeks before his WEDDING. 
Only one person from that period ever apologized. But the worst part is that when discussing it with a very close friend from high school who is a very committed feminist and caring person, she still said that I was mature for my age then and that it wasn’t a big deal. Sometimes I still question if she’s right, but I don’t think she is." —Anonymous, Washington
"I never realized he was a predator until I was in my thirties, and my daughter was a toddler." —Anonymous, Pennsylvania
"It's sad because my female family members said male attention was what we all aspired to get; because that's what society says women should want; because I wanted that. Just sad." —Anonymous, United Kingdom
"Fast forward to me at 21 finding out from an old co-worker that I was just one of his many younger 'friends.' He’s still working there today." —Anonymous, Unknown
"Two months after we had broken up, he called me to ask if he had raped me and if I was the one who exposed him at his college. I was shocked and just asked him, 'You don't know when you've raped someone?' He ended up getting accused, along with all of his friends, of multiple rapes and harassment situations. It definitely affected me." —Anonymous, Brazil
"I come from a very male-dominated family where what they say goes, and that is that. It took years to unlearn this behavior. That is not okay." —Anonymous, Arizona
"I’m 34 now and still haven’t been totally honest with myself about how dangerous these situations were. I was so lost and broken and found so much excitement in being rebellious and feeling like I was in control. I had large breasts and received unsolicited sexual attention from older men by age 12. When I was 15 I was assaulted by older men and raped by a 28-year-old.
This predatory dynamic defined much of my adolescent experience with sex and dating. It took me years to work through this, and I still carry lingering shame and guilt since I had been drinking at the time. It surely contributed to my distorted view of getting attention from older men. 
If I were to give any advice to my younger self, it would be to love myself so much more than I did. To know my worth. To realize these predators are selfish, entitled, and manipulative men. To surround myself with lots of good girlfriends and not be in such a hurry to grow up. Due to different circumstances, I had to take on adult responsibilities as a child — but navigating sexual attention from adult men should not have been one of them." —Anonymous, North Carolina
"I was figuring it out so that he didn't have to. I saved him from eviction only for him to be evicted months later. Guess who conned me out of the car because I knew he 'could use it?'
I now know why he only dates younger women. I didn't know what I wanted in life or in a relationship. I know I wasn't the only fresh out of high school girl who never had a boyfriend. He dates younger girls because he has nothing to offer, and it is how he controls the relationship." —Anonymous, Texas
"It took six years and the Me Too movement for me to realize that I was sexually abused." —Anonymous, Unknown
"I got a Facebook at 18, and he messaged me, but I blocked him. At the time, I found this exciting, but now I'm so creeped out." —Anonymous, United Kingdom
"Eventually, he stopped calling, and I was left with even more trauma and abandonment issues than when he found me." —Anonymous, Nevada
"On my 18th birthday, he arrived and kissed my cheek in front of my parents. I felt hugely panicked. I had this feeling like he'd been waiting for me to turn 18 so he could 'go public,’ and that he was going to keep on being with me like he had been — only now we could tell people. It made me feel inexplicably awful. I lashed out, and we had a dreadful row that night. I told him I'd met someone else who didn't make me feel emotional whiplash like he did, and that I wanted him to leave me alone. 
When I was in my early twenties and effectively at the same life point that he'd been then — out of university, getting a grown-up job — it really hit me how young I'd been at 17 (when he was 21), and how he knew how young I'd been. He was a family friend. He knew I didn't have experience with other guys, he knew I'd had a fairly sheltered upbringing, and he knew that I'd idolized him as a child. Then he'd do things with me, and I'd find out he was dating someone his own age. I never knew where I stood.
I always thought he was my friend, but I realized he never cared about me at all. I was just convenient to him. I cut that guy out of my life brutally. Both my and his parents just think that we'd always been great friends until I suddenly became a massive bitch to him when I was 18. I still frequently get updated by my-mom-via-his-mom on him, his wife, and their children. I'm sure they report back to him about me and my family, too. We met up a few years ago at a family event, and he was laughing and joking with my parents, my brother, and my partner. I sometimes wish I could scream and shout at him. Doesn't he even feel guilty at all about how much he took advantage of me? Then made me out to be the bad guy? 
I feel very lucky that I met my first proper boyfriend just before that incident on my 18th. It didn't last long, but I don't think I'd have realized how wrong it had been if I hadn't had a nice, fun, straightforward, face-value flirtation and relationship that I could be open with people about and stuff. I know that if my 'friend' had really announced our 'relationship' to our families, I'd never have been able to get away from him. They're so close that I'd never have been able to break up with him — and I think he knew that, too." —Anonymous, United Kingdom
"Growing up in an abusive family is like a one-way street to being taken advantage of as a teenager." —Anonymous, California
"I have never been able to forget him saying the 12-year-old comment, and it turned me off from older men forever. It didn't matter that I was 19, he was still a pedophile at heart." —Anonymous, Washington
"When I went to college, I ended up dating a friend of his. The friend had no idea the predator and I dated because I had to keep it secret. The predator then went on to tell this friend that I cheated on him. He also told his entire friend circle that I cheated on him so they'd all hate and blame me. It worked. Only his friend could see the deception, and he stayed with me. None of the other friends saw that the predator took advantage of an underage girl. His toxicity continued, and he alienated all of my new boyfriend's friends from us. 
Years later, he tried to message me on Facebook. I deleted the message and never read it. There’s nothing he can say to me after everything he’s done to me. All I need to know is that I know that he was a predator and toxic. If I could go back in time, I would never have dated this person. I’m happy now. I have a beautiful family and a wonderful loving partner. I will make sure my daughter knows what a predator is and never fall into his trap." —Anonymous, Hawaii
"I still don’t know how old he was, but anywhere from mid-twenties to mid-thirties is my guess. I wish I could say that was the only time an older man took advantage of me, but I have other stories. 
I was taught — not by my parents, but by magazines, TV, peers, etc. — that male attention was so highly desirable that questioning it was just never a priority for me. To sacrifice male attention was such a foreign idea. 
To those who love to speculate about one's family background with stuff like this: I was never abused as a child and have a very healthy relationship with both parents. The toxic tendrils of the patriarchy run deep nonetheless." —Anonymous, Massachusetts
"He was manipulative and emotionally abusive. Never doubt your instincts! I didn't find the age gap suspicious since I grew up with my parents having an 11-year difference — a completely different dynamic, I realize now. I was in your typical high school relationship, so the thought of dating an 'older and mature' guy who wouldn't be caught up in the drama at school was ideal.
However, he was hiding drugs and making up stories about ex-girlfriends to gaslight me. It breaks my heart that I spent my senior year of high school and the first three years of college fixated with him, trying to make him happy. It took a few fuck boys, but I finally got enough courage to say goodbye permanently. 
It's been six years! I am married to the most caring man now, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't have my own version of PTSD from my abuser. I couldn't picture my future when I was with him. I had no dreams or aspirations — only to make him happy. I truly think if I wouldn't have broken out of the cycle, I would have ended up dead. I take it one day at a time and let the satisfaction of letting the days become years be my motivation to stay away and not let him back into my life." —Anonymous, Pennsylvania

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"When I asked him why, he said, 'Because you’re a tease. That's like dangling a steak in front of a tiger and not letting him eat it.'"
"Fast-forward to a few weeks later, his wife, who I never knew about, contacted me and told me to leave her husband alone. I was mortified. He tried to mess around with me some more, but him being married seemed like the icing on the this is messed up cake. 
Again, guys at my school saw me as the quiet nerd, so if you don't think your quiet, studious daughter could fall prey to something like this, think again." —Anonymous, Pennsylvania
"We would talk on Instagram when it wasn't summer and I wasn't at camp. He made me feel so special. I didn’t even apply anywhere else for college. At college, he said there was an unspoken rule that staff don’t date freshmen. I believed him and waited on him. 
I would do anything just to be with him, so I did what he said and never told my friends or anyone else that I was meeting him. I was 21 and he was 28 when the professor spotted us. At that point, he was promising we’d get married when I was done with school. I was broken-hearted. I’d spent so many years waiting on this guy and doing everything he said — missing out on normal experiences for someone my age all for me to have to act like it never happened. 
That was almost 10 years ago, and it has affected my dating life in major ways. It’s a big reason why I completely reject the church now." — emileem3
"Looking back now, that is SO creepy. My cousin had every right to be worried. Why could they not take college-aged girls on dates? Moreover, a lot of the boys in my class did the same to freshman girls when we were seniors. It seems like they learned from the men before them. So sad." —Anonymous, Massachusetts 
"Neither he nor any of his friends had anything in common with me. I felt so insecure because they were actual adults, and I wasn’t even old enough to go to a bar." — lindsayb4bf85de3d
"We saw each other for six months, and I eventually learned that he was married and had a kid my age." — marthamtzmedina
"Immediately, I felt uncomfortable and saw that this 28-year-old man was just acting on a sick fantasy to be with someone young and a virgin, and that was all that mattered to him. 
His pressuring me to have relations felt like rape. I kept going back and forth in my mind over whether I should have, or whether I did the right thing by cutting all contact — which was quite hard since he was my nephew's uncle. 
I have a daughter now, and I want to teach her that this is not OK, nor is it a sort of badge of womanhood to grab the attention of a man in your teenage years." —Anonymous, Massachusetts 
"There were no policies around dating at my work. Ultimately, I ended up staying overseas for nearly a decade. He still drunk-dials me once a year and leaves a voicemail about how delightful he found the times he sexually assaulted me. (He's blocked, and, yes, I've changed numbers, but that piece of s#$% is crafty.) 
At the time, the age difference didn't seem like a big deal. But now that I'm older, I look back and think, 'What kind of degenerate, emotionally stunted creep...?!' Even if it's legal, it is NOT OK!" —Anonymous, California 
"He was controlling and dictated when I could be out of the house, how much money I had access to, and who he approved of me spending time with. He never hit me, but he preyed on my insecurities and shame to control me. 
It’s taken years of therapy and working on myself to understand that I was abused, but I’ve gotten help and support and am finally beginning to heal. I really wish my parents had intervened and stopped me from being with him. I moved in with him before I graduated from high school, and I feel like I wasted all my youth in this miserable marriage." —Anonymous, Missouri
"He also confessed that he was actually married and had an elementary school-aged son." —Anonymous, Texas 
"We never went anywhere. It was purely a physical relationship, or we'd hang with some of his friends in their basements. 
I broke up with him after about three months, and his mom reached out to me multiple times, offering to take me out to lunch to talk about getting back together with her son." — cheezesamwich
"He cut me off from family and friends. Again, he'd use their immaturity as a reason to get rid of them — despite him being just as, if not more, immature. He would apologize after being abusive, prey on my emotions, and pretend to cry only to carry on the abuse as soon as the dust had settled.  
I finally got out, but it took me until my twenties — when he was nearing 40 — to realize how much of a hold he had over me, how he had groomed me for this when I was too young to understand what I was getting into, and how bad this was." —Anonymous, United Kingdom
"Years later, his brother was arrested for pedophilia. This guy was hardly better. He just kept his fantasies to himself, waited until I was
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