Teenage Cocks
🔞 ALL INFORMATION CLICK HERE 👈🏻👈🏻👈🏻
Teenage Cocks
optional screen reader
Parenting
Entertainment
Health
Food
Shopping
Digital Issues
Plus Icon
Click to expand the Mega Menu
Menu
optional screen reader
Parenting
Entertainment
Health
Food
Shopping
Digital Issues
optional screen reader
Tags
masturbation
teenagers
teens
teens and sex
optional screen reader
Legal
Privacy Policy
Terms of Use
AdChoices
Privacy Preferences
optional screen reader
SheKnows Family:
She Media
StyleCaster
Soaps
BlogHer
optional screen reader
Our Sites
Artnews
BGR
Billboard
Deadline
Fairchild Media
Footwear News
Gold Derby
IndieWire
Robb Report
Rolling Stone
SheKnows
She Media
Soaps
Sourcing Journal
Sportico
Spy
StyleCaster
The Hollywood Reporter
TVLine
Variety
Vibe
WWD
Food & Recipes
Expand the sub menu
Special Series
Expand the sub menu
optional screen reader
Contact Us
Advertise
AdChoices
Accessibility
Careers
Privacy Policy
EU Privacy Preferences
Terms of Use
Icon Link
Plus Icon
SheKnows is a part of Penske Media Corporation. © 2022 SheMedia, LLC. All Rights Reserved.
optional screen reader
Parenting
Entertainment
Health
Food
Shopping
Digital Issues
Plus Icon
Click to expand the Mega Menu
Menu
optional screen reader
Parenting
Entertainment
Health
Food
Shopping
Digital Issues
More stories to check out before you go
Having never been a boy, I had no idea about all the weird shit boys do to get off. Even though I had a big brother, I wasn’t privy to the vast array of strange self-satisfying tools and tricks teenage boys have up their sleeves. That is, until I met my husband and he told me a hilarious story about why he loved climbing the pole at school.
“At first,” he explained, “I just climbed because I liked to see how fast I could get to the top. But one day when I climbed something weird happened. It felt really good. Like, so good I would make sure to climb that pole every morning and every lunch.”
Even as my own sons grew, I didn’t understand just how resourceful boys could be, until I questioned my then-12-year-old about why he had a giant box of condoms in his bedroom.
His hesitation should have been my first clue.
“Well, umm,” he said. “I use them to, uh, you know…”
“To what?” I asked. I had no idea what he was trying to say.
“Oh. Oh, well, OK,” was all I managed to say.
A week later, while out for drinks with my girlfriends, who also had teen boys, I asked if that was normal.
“I don’t know about condoms,” my friend Tammy said, “but I found out my son Charlie was using socks.”
“Socks?” I had never heard of boys sexualizing slippers.
“Yeah, socks. Your boys don’t do that?” Tammy asked. “Well, Charlie does. I swear I won’t even touch his laundry anymore. All it took was one time grabbing a sock that was hard as a rock and I was done. It was nasty!”
Learning about socks, and laughing my ass off watching the Bridesmaids scene where a mom describes cracking her son’s comforter, made me curious about what other means boys employ to get their (pun intended) socks off.
Naturally, I first turned to my husband and sons to learn more. I was in for a surprise with their answers.
Like machine gun fire, my eldest son listed his favorite masturbation props.
“Let’s see, there’s good old wadded-up toilet paper, towels, even shirts. Heck, I’ll use dirty laundry if it’s there. Whatever is within reach, really,” he shared. As he spoke, my younger son nodded his head emphatically.
“Anything else?” I asked. I was all business. Hey, who was I to judge? As a teen, I’d had an amorous moment or two with my favorite bottle of perfume, Love’s Baby Soft, which, if anyone remembers, was totally shaped like a dildo.
“OK, don’t laugh, but one time I put my penis in the vacuum hose,” my youngest said.
“While it was on?” I asked. I’d lost my deadpan expression the moment I picture my son losing his penis in a vacuuming accident.
“Yeah, but it was on low, don’t worry,” he reassured me. “It didn’t feel that good, so I only did it once.”
“Oh, what about paper towel rolls?” my oldest added. “And that time I used the cantaloupe?”
Even my husband was shocked at the cantaloupe revelation. Fruit. Really? I thought that was only a thing women in prison did.
“And the trash can,” my youngest said. Was nothing sacred?
By the end of our conversation, I had the idea that my sons, and probably all teenage boys, used anything and everything at their disposal to masturbate.
With my curiosity quelled, I had to wonder if my quest for knowledge was a worthy endeavor. Honestly, I’ll probably never look at a cantaloupe the same way again, but I am grateful I had this awkward, yet illuminating, discussion with my kids.
They felt confident enough to be real, knowing full well I would write this information and share it with the world. It may seem like too much for some parents, but talks like these let me know that my sons can truly be open with me about any subject, no matter how uncomfortable. Like, penis-in-a-vacuum uncomfortable. Ouch.
Before you go, check out our slideshow below:
The stories you care about, delivered daily.
SheKnows is a part of Penske Media Corporation. © 2022 SheMedia, LLC. All Rights Reserved.
optional screen reader
Parenting
Entertainment
Health
Food
Shopping
Digital Issues
Plus Icon
Click to expand the Mega Menu
Menu
optional screen reader
Parenting
Entertainment
Health
Food
Shopping
Digital Issues
optional screen reader
Tags
masturbation
teenagers
teens
teens and sex
optional screen reader
Legal
Privacy Policy
Terms of Use
AdChoices
Privacy Preferences
optional screen reader
SheKnows Family:
She Media
StyleCaster
Soaps
BlogHer
optional screen reader
Our Sites
Artnews
BGR
Billboard
Deadline
Fairchild Media
Footwear News
Gold Derby
IndieWire
Robb Report
Rolling Stone
SheKnows
She Media
Soaps
Sourcing Journal
Sportico
Spy
StyleCaster
The Hollywood Reporter
TVLine
Variety
Vibe
WWD
Food & Recipes
Expand the sub menu
Special Series
Expand the sub menu
optional screen reader
Contact Us
Advertise
AdChoices
Accessibility
Careers
Privacy Policy
EU Privacy Preferences
Terms of Use
Icon Link
Plus Icon
SheKnows is a part of Penske Media Corporation. © 2022 SheMedia, LLC. All Rights Reserved.
optional screen reader
Parenting
Entertainment
Health
Food
Shopping
Digital Issues
Plus Icon
Click to expand the Mega Menu
Menu
optional screen reader
Parenting
Entertainment
Health
Food
Shopping
Digital Issues
More stories to check out before you go
Having never been a boy, I had no idea about all the weird shit boys do to get off. Even though I had a big brother, I wasn’t privy to the vast array of strange self-satisfying tools and tricks teenage boys have up their sleeves. That is, until I met my husband and he told me a hilarious story about why he loved climbing the pole at school.
“At first,” he explained, “I just climbed because I liked to see how fast I could get to the top. But one day when I climbed something weird happened. It felt really good. Like, so good I would make sure to climb that pole every morning and every lunch.”
Even as my own sons grew, I didn’t understand just how resourceful boys could be, until I questioned my then-12-year-old about why he had a giant box of condoms in his bedroom.
His hesitation should have been my first clue.
“Well, umm,” he said. “I use them to, uh, you know…”
“To what?” I asked. I had no idea what he was trying to say.
“Oh. Oh, well, OK,” was all I managed to say.
A week later, while out for drinks with my girlfriends, who also had teen boys, I asked if that was normal.
“I don’t know about condoms,” my friend Tammy said, “but I found out my son Charlie was using socks.”
“Socks?” I had never heard of boys sexualizing slippers.
“Yeah, socks. Your boys don’t do that?” Tammy asked. “Well, Charlie does. I swear I won’t even touch his laundry anymore. All it took was one time grabbing a sock that was hard as a rock and I was done. It was nasty!”
Learning about socks, and laughing my ass off watching the Bridesmaids scene where a mom describes cracking her son’s comforter, made me curious about what other means boys employ to get their (pun intended) socks off.
Naturally, I first turned to my husband and sons to learn more. I was in for a surprise with their answers.
Like machine gun fire, my eldest son listed his favorite masturbation props.
“Let’s see, there’s good old wadded-up toilet paper, towels, even shirts. Heck, I’ll use dirty laundry if it’s there. Whatever is within reach, really,” he shared. As he spoke, my younger son nodded his head emphatically.
“Anything else?” I asked. I was all business. Hey, who was I to judge? As a teen, I’d had an amorous moment or two with my favorite bottle of perfume, Love’s Baby Soft, which, if anyone remembers, was totally shaped like a dildo.
“OK, don’t laugh, but one time I put my penis in the vacuum hose,” my youngest said.
“While it was on?” I asked. I’d lost my deadpan expression the moment I picture my son losing his penis in a vacuuming accident.
“Yeah, but it was on low, don’t worry,” he reassured me. “It didn’t feel that good, so I only did it once.”
“Oh, what about paper towel rolls?” my oldest added. “And that time I used the cantaloupe?”
Even my husband was shocked at the cantaloupe revelation. Fruit. Really? I thought that was only a thing women in prison did.
“And the trash can,” my youngest said. Was nothing sacred?
By the end of our conversation, I had the idea that my sons, and probably all teenage boys, used anything and everything at their disposal to masturbate.
With my curiosity quelled, I had to wonder if my quest for knowledge was a worthy endeavor. Honestly, I’ll probably never look at a cantaloupe the same way again, but I am grateful I had this awkward, yet illuminating, discussion with my kids.
They felt confident enough to be real, knowing full well I would write this information and share it with the world. It may seem like too much for some parents, but talks like these let me know that my sons can truly be open with me about any subject, no matter how uncomfortable. Like, penis-in-a-vacuum uncomfortable. Ouch.
Before you go, check out our slideshow below:
The stories you care about, delivered daily.
SheKnows is a part of Penske Media Corporation. © 2022 SheMedia, LLC. All Rights Reserved.
By Theresa Edwards | August 1, 2014
22 Celebrities Who Are Having Babies in 2022
25 Random Parenting Memes That Will Never NOT Be Funny
Here’s exactly how to turn any bathroom into a parent’s spa oasis
19 Mom-Themed Cocktails To Make For Your Next Playdate
22 Most Popular Gender-Neutral Baby Names of 2022
Your In-Depth Parenting Guide On Using Melatonin For Toddlers
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes.
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Accept
Deny
View preferences
Save preferences
View preferences
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes.
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Accept
Deny
View preferences
Save preferences
View preferences
One of the things that I never stopped to consider about women who have sons is that they have a new level of peener to contend with: baby peen . When you’re a woman and you have a daughter you can recognize pretty much immediately what is normal down there and whether something is amiss , because you match, for the most part. Baby penis is something that you may or may not have a barometer for, depending on how many baby peens total you’ve dealt with in your lifetime.
Even so, when I started watching little boys, the baby penis thing didn’t faze me; I just adjusted and moved on. And yet, on more than one occasion a mom or dad might pull me aside and ask if their son appeared to be “on par down there” to which I could only shrug because I have no idea what average baby penis size is, unlike, say, a pediatrician would.
It turns out that the concern about baby twigs and bitty berries being too small is a real thing, and I don’t want to poke fun too much because I understand what it’s like to be concerned about every little thing.
But at the same time, I think it’s a foregone conclusion that baby penises are small. There are cases where there’s a real medical concern, but that is very rare indeed. When a doctor – a real one, not someone on the internet who totally majored in baby penis for a semester in college – tells you to worry, then you start to worry. Until then, it’s no big penis deal.
Hidden penis is a real thing, you guys, but try not to freak out, because it’s very common. According to medilexicon, it’s a “normal penis obscured by suprapubic fat.” So once the baby fat starts to disappear, everything will start to look normal.
I’d venture to say that the worst thing for a male isn’t to have a small penis. And boys can sit on toilet seats to pee until they have a little something more to grip.
Eight months is too early to start worrying overmuch about future penis
Nympho Pawg
Gagging Deep
Punish Taboo