Teenage Angst

Teenage Angst
Sherrie Hurd is a professional writer and artist with over 20 years of experience. As a survivor of childhood trauma and multiple types of abuse, she is an advocate for mental health awareness. Sherrie manages multiple mental illnesses, including anxiety disorder, bipolar disorder, and PTSD. With this background and personal experience, she strives to help others overcome trauma and abuse, cope with mental illness, and heal over time.
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There’s a creature, clad in dark hoodie, which makes odd groans and speaks in alien languages. No, it’s not a monster , it’s only a teenager suffering from angst. Teen angst turns a bright-eyed little child into a hormonal work in progress. It’s truly a sight to be seen if you haven’t already witnessed such a spectacle.
It’s normal, however. So, there could be a scientific reason why your teen is being less than courteous and punctual.
Teen angst should not be confused with depression, which sometimes warrants professional help . Depression is also not a healthy condition. Teen angst, on the other hand, is a natural symptom of the growing process.
People between the age of 10 and 20 must go through a rather grueling ordeal . During this time, hormone changes are occurring which make the pressures of life and school harder to bear. Angst is basically a form of anxiety developed by those going through this growth period.
Not to worry, there are subtle clues which can help you discover the truth about your teen. Yes, teen angst occurs and is natural. Is your child entering this stage of life ?
Have you noticed your teen taking more risks lately or talking about risky behavior ? Well, even if they don’t talk about it or do it in the open, there’s a good chance they are contemplating some thrilling or controversial act. That’s why it’s important to always keep lines of communication open to help them deal with these thoughts .
There is always a chance that you can make them understand the wrongs in their desires. For instance, if they knew the truth behind this behavior, it’s possible that they would think twice.
During teen angst, the area of the brain that advocates thrill-seeking behavior grows faster than the area that governs logical caution, and you can teach them this. Hope this helps.
You may notice your teen being short-tempered and emotional. This is because of the range of different hormones bombarding their growing bodies. Their identities are being formed , along with their sexual preferences. These raging hormones will make them lash out without thinking.
While there is little research on how this works, you can help by simply being patient. Understand that when your teen lashes out, it’s not personal .
I had to learn the hard way to not engage too deeply with an angst-ridden teen of mine. The more I pressed in, the more guarded he became until he collapsed emotionally into fits of anger and tears. That was a devastating thing for me to witness.
Just be careful , tread lightly with punishments, but do stand your ground.
This is a hurtful yet necessary trait of the angsty teenager . Being rude is usually targeted toward their parents and siblings and is a form of growth.
When they are rude, they are keeping a connection with their families while showing their desire for separation . In a nutshell, they are trying to see what it’s like to be independent without the commitment of actually being on their own.
Although their rudeness is hard to stomach at times, just know that it’s a natural thing. You can, however, reprimand them about their attitude letting them know that you will not tolerate such behavior.
Although they will probably do it again, it’s important that they understand who is ultimately in charge here.
While not every child is messy , many of them are. It’s a symptom of teenage angst. Some think that teenagers just don’t place importance on the look and smell of their rooms. This is why many children have “mystery smells” and other things coming from their closets and such.
After all, your house is not really their house, as they will be growing up and moving on some day. They still see cleaning as something of lesser importance compared to their social lives and physical changes .
While it wouldn’t be a good idea to do all the cleaning for them, you can help. There has to be a balance where you let them know you will be supportive , but you will also teach them valuable cleanliness as well. They will pick up the clean habit over time.
Most teenagers, going through teen angst, listen to ungodly loud music and they never flinch. I guess some of us adults do as well…guilty.
Teens, however, have a higher tolerance to the sounds than someone who is around 25 or older. They may also listen to emotional and dark music as well which is a part of searching for their identity.
Yes, you have to reprimand them about the volume of their music, but maybe you can explain the differences in how we hear the sounds. This could help them be more considerate of others.
Of course, you will have to navigate the rudeness during this process as well. Lol
Your teen may also experience physical symptoms during teen angst. Growth pains and hormonal changes can cause leg pains and even an upset stomach. While some of this is normal, it is important to keep a watch on any physical changes when they occur during this time.
Make sure you visit the doctor regularly to ensure your teen is growing normally. It’s better to be a little paranoid than risk a more serious condition. After all, with the changes associated with teen angst, it can be easy to overlook severe physical ailments.
Teens, going through teen angst, will avoid their parents and siblings more often than not.
With my oldest child, I rarely even caught a glimpse of him during the summer . He spent most of his time with video games and friends. Yes, this is a common thing with youth. Right now, my middle child is going through this as well. Due to differences in personality, I see him a bit more. Shrug….
If you’re seeking help with this, then take heart. Although you might not be able to force them to spend quality time with you, you can steal a few chances by making connections with them.
For instance, ask about their games . Sometimes teens love to talk about their favorite games and share their accomplishments. Yes, it might seem silly, but stepping into their world helps you understand them better.
I will reiterate how to deal with teen angst. Alright, first of all, do not force your teen to talk to you. This usually ends in resentment. When they are ready to open up, they will.
When they do, try your hardest not to ridicule or judge the things they confide . Otherwise, they will talk less and less, depriving you of their teen lives. Trust me, I’ve made this mistake. Fortunately, I fixed it.
Look for opportunities to connect, as I said before. There will be fewer connections as they grow into their own. This is because they are leaving childhood with your influences, and entering adulthood with the influence of friends and others. This is hard to swallow , but making connections keeps you in the loop.
Most of all, just love them and be there for them. They might not tell you, but they love you.
Very nice article! I do appreciate your precise obeservations.
Thank you for reading, Sahil. I just read, research, and then try to understand it from my own experiences as a mother.
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If you're the parent of a teen, you may already have witnessed it: hair-trigger moods and drama worthy of a midday soap opera. The frustration and anxiety kids feel about life at this age bubbles up as teen angst.
It may not affect all kids, but it's not surprising when it does. After all, this stage is full of giant social, personal, and physical changes. And those stressful shifts can affect what teens eat, how they sleep, even how much energy they have to be active.
It’s easy for parents to feel helpless, especially when some of that angst is directed at you. But you can help your teen find healthy ways to deal with their feelings -- and preserve your own sanity at the same time.
Many teenagers actually want guidance from their parents. They just may not want to ask for it.
"The best thing a parent can do is talk frequently and spend regularly scheduled time with their teens," says Ana Radovic, MD, assistant professor of pediatrics at Children's Hospital of Pittsburgh of UPMC.
The scheduling part is important. School, sports, clubs, time with friends, and after-school jobs can keep their days jam-packed. You can easily fall off their calendar.
So set a time when the two of you walk the dog or run errands together on a weekend afternoon. You may not talk about anything that seems important, but the signal you send makes a difference.
"This will help their teen know they are available when they do need to talk to them about something important," Radovic says.
It's easier to be a teen if you get enough rest. It's also easier to be the parent of a teen who gets enough sleep.
Most adolescents need at least 8 hours a night, but many fall far short. (Remember those jam-packed schedules?) When they’re tired, they’re moody and sluggish -- a recipe for extra angst. But with the right amount of rest, they’ll have more energy, make better choices around food and exercise, and just feel better overall.
Help your teen learn to make sleep a priority. That means going to bed and waking up at the same times almost every day, including on the weekend. Other tips may also help:
The last thing a pouty teen may want to do is get up and move, but it’s one of the best ways he can feel better. Exercise can help burn through anger, frustration, and anxiety. It also promotes better sleep.
So hand your teen his earbuds and send him outside to walk, run, or shoot hoops. It’s a chance to blow off some steam, and he’ll learn a healthy way to deal with stress for the future.
Even better, lace up your shoes and join him outside. Even if you don’t talk or workout together, the example you set is powerful.
You may be older and wiser, but resist the urge to lecture your teen. It’s more likely to cause hostility and rebellion. Instead, practice "active listening."
This means "listening with an open mind without interrupting, being able to communicate back what you heard that person say," says Alan Delamater, PhD, director of clinical psychology at the University of Miami Miller School of Medicine. "Basically it means you are not talking as much as you are listening."
Teens also like to talk about things they are experts in. So ask them to teach you about something, like technology, Radovic says. It's a fairly safe bet that they understand Snapchat better than you do.
When you feel anxious or angry, especially if the cause is your teen, take a breath. Find your own ways to calm down and handle your emotions without lashing out. Remember that sleep and exercise are just as important for you as they are for your kids.
Plus, you’ll model for your teen some healthy ways to deal with stress.
"If you want to be an effective parent of a teenager, take care of yourself," Delamater says.
The University of Alabama Parenting Assistance Line: "Discipline & Guidance - Dealing Effectively with You
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