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By Laurie Segall January 25, 2015: 6:13 PM ET
In a nondescript building in San Francisco's Potrero Hill, a diverse group of entrepreneurs, doctors, financiers and artists gather for the monthly Bronze Party -- an event where couples dance, drink and, if they're up for it, have sex with other partners.
The Bronze Party is referred to as a "lifestyle party," a modernized term for what many refer to as swinger's parties.
Downstairs at the party, women wear stilettos and fishnet stockings and mingle with their significant others. Many take off garments as the hours pass. Upstairs, there's what's referred to as a "play room," full of mattresses covered in red sheets, where couples tend to gravitate later in the evening. They may have sex with each other. They may switch partners. Some just watch.
These types of events are nothing new, but what makes this one different is its high-tech nature. Ben Fuller, who started throwing the Bronze Party in 2011, is a former tech entrepreneur who sold his first company in 2000 for just less than $5 million. He said there are 1,300 active profiles for people who attend the Bronze Party.
Fuller and a colleague also run Modern Lifestyle, an online platform that connects about 50 sex clubs around the country. Their software gives people the ability see who's attending events and purchase tickets. They sold $3 million in tickets last year.
Fuller also capitalizes on some of the tech-oriented members in his own backyard. He says there are several tech entrepreneurs who attend events and provide valuable feedback.
"They often have great ideas about technology ... that I can apply here at Bronze Party, " he says, citing an iPhone developer who helped manage contact information, email experts who've helped get around Gmail filters, and a user experience designer who helped redesign the website and mobile app.
"We are in Silicon Valley," says Stella, an engineer who attends. "People here don't have a very high tolerance for bad websites."
Stella has been with her husband, Greg, both engineers, for 10 years. They've been swapping partners for two of them.
"Whereas you might go to a bar, pick up somebody and take them home for the evening if you're single, here it wouldn't be unheard of to do that even if you're married," says Greg.
Members are also discovering the Bronze Party through apps like Secret, which allows users to post anonymously, Fuller says.
"We just heard from a threesome -- two women and a man -- who said 'Oh, we heard about it on Secret.'"
In the '70s, swinging was often random. "Key parties," as they were called, refer to events couples attended. At the end of the night, men would put their keys in a bowl, women would pick a key and go home with the guy who owned it.
Those communities still exist, but tech is now making it easier for people to find one another, Fuller says.
"In the old days, you never knew where you were going," Fuller says. "Now you get a really good sense. The event details ...even the pictures of the people that are going to be attending the party."
In preparation for events, many Bronze Club members use a feature called, "Auto Date," Fuller says.
"[It] allows you into the party itself, to choose the people that you're interested in, and if you choose and they choose, you get a notification," he says.
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Married couples in this Ohio neighborhood spice it up with neighbors.
By RACHEL SMITH and MICHAEL CAPPETTA
The Swingers Next Door: Ohio Couple Shares Lifestyle With Neighbors
These suburban swingers say they actively swap sexual partners and host swingers parties for neighbors.
— -- Tony and Diana have been married for five years and have three kids together.
Their days spent doing craft projects with their kids or getting them ready for school makes them seem like an everyday, normal family from Cincinnati, Ohio. But Tony and Diana, who asked that their last name not be used, have a secret.
They are swingers, who actively swap sexual partners and host swingers parties for their suburban neighbors.
Watch the full story on "Nightline" tonight at 12:35 a.m. ET
Tony and Diana are such proponents of the lifestyle, they even agreed to appear on a new reality show on A&E called “Neighbors With Benefits,” which premieres on Sunday, March 22 at 10 p.m. ET.
Tony, who owns his own construction company, said he loves watching his wife have sex with another man.
“It’s an extension of myself, watching her pleased and stuff from different angles. Man, I feel awkward saying all this,” he said. “I think there definitely needs to be a healthy amount of jealousy in every relationship, especially a swinging relationship.”
The husband and wife said they are very picky when it comes to choosing partners to have sex with, and they have rules.
“If we didn’t meet you in the lifestyle and we were friends before, we will not ever cross that boundary,” Tony said. “Our friendship is way, way, way more important than any sexual fantasy could ever be.”
“We have group texting,” Diana said. “We have individual texting. I’m comfortable with Tony individual texting another girl. I guess I could look at his phone any point in time if I wanted to.”
Tony and Diana’s love story begins like many young couples. Diane said Tony was a “typical 21-year-old” when they met and had a wandering eye.
“I didn’t really want to settle down, I just wanted to have fun,” Tony said. “I just wanted to party.”
Diana said she had never even heard of “swinging” until Tony introduced her to it, but once she tried it, she said she was on board. But swinging does have it downsides.
“Jealousy is always a big issue for some people, especially first getting involved in the lifestyle,” Diana said. “It’s a hurdle that you have to get used to and kind of adapt to.”
“She’s still my wife, I love her very much, I’m very protective over her,” Tony added. “We made that decision to move forward. She didn’t do it on her own, and I didn’t do it for her. We did it together. And that’s what makes the ups and downs I think easier for us, is we are trying to do it as a unit and not trying to do it as my fantasy.”
“We’ve been open and out to our communities, for our families, for five years,” Diana said. “So it’s not much different.”
To pick up potential couples to “play” with, Tony and Diana will go to bars or clubs, or they will spend a night at home with other couples into the swinging lifestyle, while their children stay at a friend’s house or with a babysitter for the night.
“We are responsible most of the time, but that doesn’t mean that, our eyes are closed to opportunities if they arise,” Diana said.
But the swinging lifestyle is drawing criticism from near and far. Mark, whose last name is also not being used, lives next door to Tony and Diana and said “I was shocked to learn what was happening next door.”
“It’s not positive for anyone,” he said. “I’m not here to judge”
A spokesman for Citizens for Community Values, an activist group against the reality show, declined “Nightline’s” requests for an on-camera interview, saying in a statement they would be staying focused on their social media campaign to get “Neighbors With Benefits” off the air.
But Diana and Tony say they have no plans to give up the swinging lifestyle anytime soon.
“We’ve been doing it since day one,” Diana said. “So we don’t have any other way to compare it to.”
And after marriage and three kids, they say swinging has brought them closer together.
“Our relationship is good because of the communication and a lot of relationships are lacking that, and we really got the tools to do that through swinging,” Tony said. “I think the reason we can be so happy is because we can communicate through everything and be honest with each other.”
Watch the full story on "Nightline" tonight at 12:35 a.m. ET

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