Teen Boy First Time

Teen Boy First Time

Alaina Leary is an award-winning editor and journalist. She is currently the communications manager of the nonprofit We Need Diverse Books and the senior editor of Equally Wed Magazine. Her work has been published in New York Times, Washington Post, Healthline, Teen Vogue, Cosmopolitan, Boston Globe Magazine, and more. In 2017, she was awarded a Bookbuilders of Boston scholarship for her dedication to amplifying marginalized voices and advocating for an equitable publishing and media industry. Alaina lives in Boston with her wife and their two cats.
9 Lansdowne St.
Suite 2
Boston, MA 02215
Her Campus may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website. Copyright © 2021 Her Campus Media, LLC. All Rights Reserved.
Is sex for the first time really that different for guys than it is for girls? There are a lot of myths and stereotypes attached to sex, depending on gender—but they’re not all true. From movies and TV, it may seem like sex is completely different for guys than it is for girls, but we talked to several guys to find out what it’s really like behind the scenes.
Just like girls can regret having sex, guys can, too. A guy may have sex earlier than he expected or with a partner that he’s no longer with. It’s perfectly normal for either gender to feel a sense of uncertainty about whether or not they made the right decision.
“My ex and I broke up shortly after we started having sex,” says Colin*, a recent graduate of the University of Texas at Austin. “She started cheating on me. I didn’t regret having sex at the time, but now I kind of do. I didn’t know what type of person she was.”
It’s not the end of the world to end up regretting your first time, for a variety of reasons. All those things you heard about virginity and how sacred it is? They’re not necessarily true. Your sex life is what you make of it, and there’s nothing shameful about not being 100 percent pleased with how your first time turned out. Don’t forget: practice makes perfect!
There’s a stereotype attached to the idea that guys have more sex—and start having sex earlier—than women. The fact is that this isn’t true. Plenty of guys have sex later than girls, and even if it’s his first time, that doesn’t mean it’s hers.
Just because one partner has had sex, however, doesn’t mean the other partner should feel insecure. “I didn’t know if I’d be living up to expectations,” says Adam*, a freshman at Boston College. “My girlfriend assured me that she really wanted to have sex with me, and that there was nothing I could do wrong.”
While it’s true that you get better at sex with practice, the same is true for every partner. Just because someone’s had sex with other partners doesn’t mean they’ll be better at sex—because they still have to learn what it’s like with a new partner. Sex is about exploring what two people like as individuals as well as together, and it’s a learning process no matter how many previous partners you’ve had (or haven’t had).
There’s no across-the-board answer for what it’s like to have sex for the first time as a guy, especially when you take into account the variety of sexual orientations and gender identities.
Nathan*, a senior at the University of Connecticut, says that he was hesitant to have sex for the first time because he wasn’t interested in anal sex, and many gay and bisexual men are. “By not liking anal sex, I felt like there must have been something wrong,” he says. “My partner was really understanding, but I was worried I was not making him happy.”
Nathan also made sure his partner, who’d had sex before, got tested for STIs. He recommends that even if your partner seems certain that they’re clean, it’s a good safety precaution to be absolutely sure. Nathan offered to get tested as well, even though it was his first time having sex. “Even though I was never sexually active, it just showed we cared about each other’s wellbeing and comfort before committing sexually,” he says.
For transgender and genderqueer guys, sex can also be a time of self-discovery and mutual trust with a partner. Jack*, a sophomore at Emerson College, knew he needed to feel completely at ease with a partner before having sex, because he’s transgender.
“Trans people are open to a lot of discrimination—which sometimes leads to violence,” Jack says. He also had worries that a female partner wouldn’t find him attractive and wanted to be absolutely certain there was a level of trust before having sex.
This is another one of those completely false stereotypes: that women are nervous about their first time, but guys aren't. It’s a myth that, to be honest, doesn’t make a lot of sense. If you were doing something you’ve never done before, why wouldn’t you be at least a little nervous?
Steven*, a junior at California State University, says that he was nervous the first time around. “I didn’t know what I was doing,” he says. “Neither of us did—but that didn’t stop me from feeling worried. I didn’t want to mess it up, do something she didn’t like or do anything to hurt her.”
Nathan also felt awkward and uncomfortable during his first time—which he attributes to the fact that he wasn’t sure about anal sex. “I understand most people feel awkward before, but I felt like I should have been more excited,” he says. He also realized that he and his partner have different sexual preferences, but that it’s okay and they can find ways to compromise. “My partner and I are still together and learning something new about each other as time goes on.”
If a guy’s nerves seem to be getting in the way, stop and make sure that both partners are consenting and really want to have sex . If they do, but are just nervous, ease the tension by reminding them that you’re not perfect either—you’re just human. Level the playing field, and don’t make sex into something that has to be achieved perfectly from day one.
There are so many stereotypes out there, but truth be told, sex is different for every person, regardless of gender. Sex, especially for the first time, really varies depending on the partners involved, their level of trust and mutual respect, enthusiastic consent and many other factors.
The newsletter you won’t leave unread.
The newsletter you won’t leave unread.

All Titles TV Episodes Celebs Companies Keywords Advanced Search
Fully supported English (United States) Partially supported Français (Canada) Français (France) Deutsch (Deutschland) हिंदी (भारत) Italiano (Italia) Português (Brasil) Español (España) Español (México)
Three teen guys decide to lose their virginity. Some really want to and some are peer pressured into it. Three teen guys decide to lose their virginity. Some really want to and some are peer pressured into it. Three teen guys decide to lose their virginity. Some really want to and some are peer pressured into it.
It was rumored that Wes Stern passed on the role of Benjamin Braddock in The Graduate (1967) because the script for this movie was floating around Hollywood. It was in development for two years, and by time it was released The Graduate was a smash hit.
Originally rated "R" in the U.S., film was edited to be re-rated "M".
Sweet Love In The Beginning Sung by MC2 Lyrics by Michael Clough and Michael Crowley Music by Kenyon Hopkins
Sex initiation comedy-drama with sight-seeing asides...
Three big-talking teenage boys from New York, randy with bravado but no sexual experience, cross the Canadian border at Niagara Falls in search of prostitutes; instead, they chance upon a lovely young British woman they assume is a prostitute but who isn't. Amiable piffle from former-Disney director James Neilson and screenwriters Jo Heims and Roger Smith (who also co-produced) isn't very bright or witty, but has a certain shuffling charm--it's also not the last time Jacqueline Bisset would find herself between the sheets with a younger man. The boys' collective misunderstanding of the distressed girl's background isn't belabored...and when she realizes they thought she was for hire, she doesn't make a fuss, either. Still, this trio of would-be studs is rather colorless--one of the boys leers a lot while the other two look petrified--though heavy-lidded Wes Stern has a nicely low-keyed personality and Bisset seems genuinely touched by his youthful confusion. Neilson waits until nearly the end to turn the lights down low; in the meantime, we are treated to a tour of the Falls and downtown Ontario, which is fine for those seeking a nostalgic trip back in time rather than a movie with a substantial plot. ** from ****
Suggest an edit or add missing content
By what name was The First Time (1969) officially released in Canada in English?
The Best Movies and Shows in September
Double Duty: Musicians-Turned-Actors
New & Upcoming Sequels, Prequels, and Spin-Offs
Anna : Every young man must have his fill of conquests before he really loves, and I think you'll find I make a far better conquest than I do a love.
Anna : You don't have to understand. It'll happen anyway.

News & Politics

Culture

Food

Science & Health

Life Stories

Video

About

Profile
Login/Sign Up
Sticky Header: off
Night Mode: off
Saved Articles
Go Ad-Free
Logout

Sticky Header

Night Mode

Published March 5, 2017 12:30AM (EST)

Related Topics ------------------------------------------
Editor's Picks
Lgbt
Life Stories
Transgender
Transgender Bathroom Panic

The first time I used a men’s room, I was 17 years old. I looked about 14, probably, with my hair freshly cut short, my head still feeling light and buoyant after getting rid of the ponytail I’d carried through most of high school.
That bathroom was nothing special. In fact, I didn’t see most of it as I walked in, head down and turned slightly away from the line of urinals. I made a beeline for the stalls, which were the same as the stalls in every women’s room I’d ever used in my first 17 years of life.
I peed. I can’t remember if I washed my hands or not. Probably not.
I do remember that there were other men in the room. Two of them. Both at the urinals, and so their backs were toward me when I entered. And maybe they were washing their hands when I was leaving, and that’s why I’m thinking I probably didn’t wash my hands.
The first time I used a men’s room with friends — friends who’d known me from before, friends who’d known me my whole life — I was a few weeks shy of my eighteenth birthday. I’d been living as a guy for about a year. Home for the summer from boarding school, that awkward and potent summer between high school and college, I was working as a dishwasher. I’d been back in my hometown for a week or so, and a bunch of us decided to go to the movies together.
Such trips were always a challenge. First, because we all worked odd jobs with odd hours. Second, because none of us owned a car and the nearest movie theater was 40 minutes from our rural Maine town. And, for me, because though I had known these boys since preschool, I had gone away every September for the last four years to a prep school. And also because now at 17 I was, for the first time in my life, a boy.
We went to the movies, five of us crammed into someone’s mom’s sedan. Afterwards, debating Denny’s versus Friendly’s, we veered down the hallway toward the movie theater’s bathrooms. My short hair hadn’t been mentioned — I’d had it short third grade through seventh grade, after all, only growing it out at my mom’s insistence. They’d been calling me Al for years, so I didn’t have to tell them that I’d changed my name from Alice to Alex. And I wore the same t-shirts and jeans and flannel shirts and sneakers that I always wore.
Down that hallway, I thought, which one? Easy enough to just go in the women’s room, give people a dirty look when they scowled at me. It was the mid-’90s. Grunge and androgyny were reasonably widespread, even in the sticks of Maine. But I hated using the women’s room and not just because of being a boy. I hated it because of what was said to me: G et out! Was the nicest version. Other variations included dyke, queer, butch, bitch, creep , once (oddly) faggot and other, unprintable, words.
So I said to my friends, "Do you mind if I use the men’s room with you? Or would that be weird?"
And my best friend Bryan said, "Of course not. It would only be weird if you used the urinal."
I didn’t. In subsequent years, I would think about that — using the urinal. Devices were sold, tricks bandied about in trans groups I went to. Medicine spoons and surgical tubing. The plastic lid to a coffee can (clear plastic is best), trimmed of its edges, could be stowed in the back pocket, lifted out in one’s palm, curled into a funnel and used with care at a urinal. So long as you peed slowly and no one peeked. I practiced a few of these tricks. I got more than one pair of jeans thoroughly piss-soaked. I gave up practicing.
Lately, the news has me thinking back to that first men’s room, 21 years ago , and what drove me to go inside. I never would have entered if I thought I would have been detected, confronted, kicked out.
In fact, I’ll tell you what stands out to me even more than that first men’s room: It's the last time I went into a women’s room. I had come out as transgender to my parents just a few days before. It had gone somewhere in the range of “not a total disaster but not great.” We were out for a meal at my parents’ favorite seafood restaurant. It had not gone well already — the waitress had asked me, “What can I get you, young man?” and an argument had ensued when my parents tried to correct her and I tried to get them to shut up.
Needing to pee, or perhaps just wanting to escape the table, I went over the restrooms. I imagined what would happen if my father happened to also feel the urge at this moment, and what sort of scene might follow if he found me in the men’s room. So I went into the women’s room. At the sinks stood an older woman, who looked at me in the mirror as I entered, her eyebrows shooting up. “This is the ladies!” she said, thoroughly scandalized.
I thought about saying, “I know,” which had been my usual response during those years when I had short hair and people thought I was a boy. But this time, for the last time, I said, “I’m sorry. I guess I’m in the wrong place.”
Alex Myers lives in New Hampshire with his wife and two cats. He is a teacher who speaks often at schools across the country about transgender identity. He is also a writer; "Revolutionary," was published by Simon & Schuster in January 2014. It tells the story of his ancestor, Deborah Samson, who in 1782 ran away from home, disguised herself as a man, and fought in the Revolutionary War.

Copyright © 2022 Salon.com, LLC. Reproduction of material from any Salon pages without written permission is strictly prohibited. SALON ® is registered in the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office as a trademark of Salon.com, LLC. Associated Press articles: Copyright © 2016 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.

Was this page helpful?
Yes
No

Performance & security by Cloudflare

You cannot access medium.com. Refresh the page or contact the site owner to request access.
Copy and paste the Ray ID when you contact the site owner.

Ray ID:

75256ca0ff169db0

75256ca0ff169db0 Copy

For help visit Troubleshooting guide

Hot Student Xxx
Porno Realni Incest
Grandmother Facesitting

Teen Boy First Time

Report Page