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Anal sex can hurt, that much seems clear. But a new study of British teenagers also reveals a few aspects of this sexual activity that are perhaps more surprising.
The researchers interviewed 130 teens ages 16 to 18 from diverse backgrounds, and asked them about their perceptions of different sexual practices, as well as their own experiences. The results showed that most teens' anal sex experiences occurred in a relationship setting, but first experiences with anal sex were rarely under circumstances of mutual exploration of sexual pleasure .
Instead, it was mainly men who pushed the women to try anal sex, and men said they felt expected to take this role. Moreover, the teens expected men to find pleasure in anal sex, whereas women were mostly expected to endure the negative aspects of anal sex, such as pain or a damaged reputation. [ Hot Stuff: 10 Unusual Sexual Fixations ]
Young women in the study reported anal sex as painful, but at the same time, the majority of teens saw women's experience of pain as due to women being "naïve or flawed," and unable to relax, the researchers said in their findings published today today (Aug. 13) in the journal BMJ .
The results also revealed somewhat surprising, and in some cases concerning, aspects of anal sex. However, the findings may not be generalizable to all populations, because they are based on a small study of heterosexual teenagers.
Men compete with each other to have anal sex
Young men in the study appeared to perceive having anal sex as a feat in competition. Even though not all the young men in the study said they wanted to have anal sex, many of them said men encourage one another to try the practice. In a group discussion as part of the study, young men said anal sex was something they do for competition.
A lot of guys didn't really like it
Young men in the study were often keen on the idea of anal sex, but were sometimes unenthusiastic about the physical reality, the researchers said. For example, one interviewee said: "I thought it was going to be a lot better to be honest."
Only one young woman in the study stated slightly positive feelings about having had anal sex. Although she said she was persuaded by her partner to engage in anal sex, she also told the researcher that she was curious about trying it, and had enjoyed her experience.
The researchers found that the teenagers thought women would generally be reluctant to have anal sex, and would participate only if persuaded, or even coerced into it, and that the act might hurt them.
The researchers wrote that it seemed women commonly saw their role as accepting or declining their partner's request for anal sex, rather than being an equal decision-maker about this sexual activity.
"It seemed that men were expected to persuade or coerce reluctant partners," the researchers said.
However, the researchers noted that some young men in the study did say they avoided anal sex because they believed it might hurt their partners.
In some cases, teens reported that anal penetration happened accidentally, because they "slipped." But in one case, a male teenager corrected himself in a second interview, and said that what he had initially referred to as an accident was in fact no accident after all.
"It is difficult to assess the extent to which events described as 'slips' were genuinely unintentional," the researchers said.
The researchers said describing events as "slips" may enable men and women to avoid confronting the possibility that a non-consensual penetration was deliberate.
Teens don't know they can get STDs from unprotected anal sex
The researchers found that many interviewed teenagers didn't know it is possible to get a sexually transmitted disease (STD) from unprotected anal sex. Some actually said that getting an STD via anal sex was impossible, or less likely than for vaginal intercourse, according to the study.
The researchers also found that condoms don't seem to be a frequent element in anal sex, and when they were used, it was for hygiene purposes not STD prevention. [ Quiz: Test Your STD Smarts ]
Porn is only one factor behind anal sex
Participants often mentioned that young men want to have anal sex with women because they want to copy what they saw in pornography . But the researchers said pornography appears to be only one factor in why teens may have anal sex, and the new findings suggest there are also other explanations and motivations involved.
"Current debates about young people's sex lives often seem to focus narrowly on the impact of porn," said lead author Cicely Marston, senior lecturer in social science at the London School of Hygiene & Tropical Medicine. "But our study suggests we need to think more widely about the lack of importance society places on women's rights, desires and concerns."
Email Bahar Gholipour or follow her @alterwired . Follow Live Science @livescience , Facebook & Google+ . Originally published on Live Science .
Copyright 2014 LiveScience , a TechMediaNetwork company. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.
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Young women and anal sex
BMJ
2022 ;
378
doi: https://doi.org/10.1136/bmj.o1975
(Published 11 August 2022)

Cite this as: BMJ 2022;378:o1975

Tabitha Gana , ST8 general and colorectal surgery , Lesley M Hunt , consultant surgeon Author affiliations Sheffield Teaching Hospitals NHS Foundation Trust, Northern General Hospital, Sheffield, UK Correspondence to: L M Hunt lesley.hunt3@nhs.net
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Tabitha Gana ST8 general and colorectal surgery , Lesley M Hunt consultant surgeon

Gana T , Hunt L M .

Young women and anal sex

BMJ 2022; 378 :o1975

doi:10.1136/bmj.o1975

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Clinicians’ reluctance to discuss possible harms is letting down a generation of women
Anal intercourse is becoming more common among heterosexual couples. Within popular culture it has moved from the world of pornography to mainstream media. 1 It is no longer considered an extreme behaviour but increasingly portrayed as a prized and pleasurable experience. 2 In Britain, the National Survey of Sexual Attitudes and Lifestyle shows participation in heterosexual anal intercourse among 16 to 24 year olds rose from 12.5% to 28.5% over the past few decades. 3 Similar trends are seen in the US, where 30-44% of men and women report experience of anal sex. 4
Individual motivation varies. Young women cite pleasure, curiosity, pleasing male partners, and coercion as factors. 5 6 Up to 25% of women with experience of anal sex report they have been pressured into it at least once. 7 Hit television shows such as Sex and the City and Fleabag may unwittingly add to the pressure, as …
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It felt as if that night wouldn't pass. I had a throbbing headache and couldn't stop crying. I don't remember when I slept off. I woke up to find my husband standing in front of my bed with last night's question: "So, what have you decided? Is your answer yes or no?"
I didn't know what to say. I gathered some courage to speak up and mumbled: "Please go to the office, I'll call you by evening and let you know my answer, I promise."
He threatened: "I will call you myself at 4pm. I want the answer and it should be 'yes'. Otherwise be ready to get punished."
By punishment, he meant anal sex. He knew that it was extremely painful for me and he used it as a tool to torture me.
He and his elder sister left for the office. I was now alone and struggling with my thoughts.
After a few hours I gathered the courage to dial my father's number and told him that I couldn't live with my husband anymore.
#HerChoice is a series of true life-stories of 12 Indian women. These accounts challenge and broaden the idea of the "modern Indian woman" - her life choices, aspirations, priorities and desires.
I was afraid that my father would be angry but his response amazed me. "Pack your bags and get out of there," he said.
I took a book, gathered my educational certificates and rushed towards the bus station.
After boarding the bus, I sent a message to my husband. "My answer is 'no' and I am going back home," it said. After that I switched off my mobile phone.
After a few hours, I was home, surrounded by my family. I had left my husband's house after only two months of marriage.
I met my husband, Sahil, when I was in the final year of graduation. He was a jovial man. I liked being around him and with time we fell in love.
We used to go on dates, talk for countless hours on phone. It seemed as if life was almost too kind to me.
But this rosy romance did not continue for long. Gradually I started realising that our relationship lacked equality. It wasn't what I had been looking for.
Our relationship was becoming like my parents' relationship. The only difference; my mother kept silent while I could not stop myself from speaking up.
My father used to scream at my mother for petty things. He would even hit her and the only thing she responded with was tears.
When Sahil and I had an argument, it would often turn into a scuffle. He would use force to get intimate with me and scream at me if I refused.
I remember him once asking me: "Suppose I hit you someday, then what would you do?"
The question stunned me. I controlled my anger with great difficulty and replied, "I would break up with you that very day."
What he said next shocked me even more. He said, "It means you don't love me. Love should be unconditional."
After this, we didn't talk for almost a month.
Our fights became more frequent. Many times I'd try to end our relationship but he would apologise every time. I wanted to get rid of him forever and don't know why I wasn't able to do it.
Meanwhile, I was being pressured into marriage.
I was a teacher now. I'd be in class, teaching children and my parents would call me.
The same conversation would be repeated. "What have you thought about marriage? Why don't you marry Sahil? If not him then let us find a suitable match for you. At least think about your younger sisters…"
If anything went wrong at home, it would be blamed on my staying single.
Mother fell sick because I wasn't getting married. My father's business suffered losses because I wasn't getting married.
I was so frustrated that I finally said yes to marriage. I was still not ready for it and didn't believe Sahil's promise that he would change his attitude.
My fears came true after our wedding. Sahil made me a puppet, dancing to his tunes.
I was fond of poetry and used to my write my poems on Facebook. He forbade me from doing it. He even started dictating what I should wear.
One day he told me that I should finish all my reading and writing work by night. "If you leave me dissatisfied in bed, I will have to go to someone else."
He'd say that I wasn't making him happy and would advise me to watch pornography so I could learn some techniques.
And then he got this obsession with seeking work in Mumbai.
He said: "You stay here, do your job and send me money to support me there, and then you take out a loan so I can buy a house."
This is what he wanted me to say yes to. That night he had pushed me on the bed and forced me into anal sex just for that yes.
A line had been crossed. I left him the morning after.
I was a well-educated woman who could earn and live on her own. Yet, my heart was sinking when I left Sahil's home.
There was a fear of being judged by my own family and society. But even bigger than that was the pain in my heart.
When I reached home, my hair was dishevelled and eyes swollen as I had cried all night.
Newly married women look ravishing when they visit home for the first time after marriage. But my face was pale and the keen eyes of my neighbours guessed why.
People started pouring in. Some would say: "Such a terrible thing has happened to you." Others consoled me that Sahil would come to apologise and take me back.
Then there were a few who thought that a woman should not make such a harsh choice over petty issues.
Everyone had something to say but their opinions could not change my decision.
It has been seven months since I left Sahil's home and now I am choosing my own path. I have received a fellowship; I am doing a job and studying as well.
We have been going to police stations and courts as the legal procedure of divorce is not over yet.
I still wake up with a start at night. I still have nightmares.
I haven't been able to forget what I had to face but I am trying to move on in earnest.
My trust in love and relationships is definitely shaken, but not broken yet. I have decided to take some time for myself. I am proud that I didn't stay silent and got out of this abusive relationship before it was too late.
That is why I believe that my future will be better than my past and present.
This is a true life-story of a woman who lives in western India as told to BBC reporter Sindhuvasini Tripathi, produced by Divya Arya. The woman's identity has been kept anonymous on request.
BBC 100 Women names 100 influential and inspirational women around the world every year and shares their stories. Find us on Facebook , Instagram and Twitter and use #100Women
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