Submissive Journey

Submissive Journey

Mallory
Richardson

|
Mar 10,
2022

This was a very helpful post to read. I could relate to you with a lot of the things you said, and you’ve given me some different points of view to look through. I really want to become a better wife to my husband, and I believe starting with becoming more submissive is the key for us. Thank you! Reply to Sia

Hello, Mallory! I wanted to thank you for sharing and imparting some practical tips, perspectives, and advice that otherwise, I might not would have considered. I truly appreciated ready your article and wanted to let you know that I could relate on so many levels and areas in my own marriage. Thanks, again!! May God continue to bless your family and your intentions in helping others. Reply to Graciela

Hello my name is Danielle I would love to talk to u some more about this topic and thank you so much Reply to Danielle

Thank you for sharing I enjoyed your post. I am working on becoming a submissive wife. Not just in actions but in my heart Also. I’m glad I came across your blog. Reply to Jonique

Interesting blog. I wonder what % of women actually want to be submissive ? Too much it taught that Submissive people get walked over, abused and generally hurt. Women have been taught to be self confident and strong to be a wife and mother. It seems a hard shift for modern women to be from a generation long ago. Reply to Albert

Rachel,
Being submissive as a wife or partner is not in the same category as abuse. When a wife chooses to be submissive, she still has a voice in the relationship. You are an individual that deserves love and respect, and standing up for yourself and your child in questionable situations is 100% warranted. I encourage you to talk to someone you trust in depth. If you’re willing to see a counselor that can help work some of these ideas and questions out in your head, that would be a great step as well. If you feel things are out of your control or like you and your child are in imminent danger, please call the National Domestic Abuse Hotline at 1−800−799−7233.
I sincerely wish you the best,
Mallory Reply to Mallory

Loved your blog very much!! Reply to Blessy

Just wonderin’ – does submission iinclude staying with an abuser? Reply to Mary

I love these tips also my husband is alway negative no matter what i feel he is not satisfied with anything i do. Reply to Lucinda

Thank you for this article. I am in the process of being the sole provider for my family to being in a relationship and it’s been hard to hand over the reins. This advice will help I’m sure. Reply to Shara

Currently trying to also learn to be submissive, but it’s hard when you have been the one in control. Reply to Sommer

Good day. I actually enjoyed reading this. I’m not married or engaged, I’m in a relationship which I want it to work out this time. So earlier today I was on the phone with my boyfriend and we had some heart to heart talk. And he said I don’t respect him. I don’t listen to him. And I’m not submissive to him. I wasn’t surprise to hear that because my ex told me about it countless times. But I was too stubborn to had listened to him. But now that I’m hearing it again it does hurt. And I thought I was the perfect idea girlfriend all these while. Yes I agreed that I’m a very stubborn person and I hate to be wrong. As for right now I really want to learn and know new things about being submissive to your man because He personally asked me to go and read it. So I’m ever ready to give it a try because I TRULY LOVE HIM. And I want to do all I can to make things work our for us Reply to Edith

Good for you! I know a lot of people will be angry for being willing to submit. After 24 years of “equal” marriage I suggested to my husband we try something different, namely, I submit to him. It’s been amazing. We are closer and happier then ever. I do not look at it as a gender thing – i was not making a statement about all women. Just about me and what was right for me. I don’t believe all women should submit. Only that every relationship be open to ONE being submissive. If it’s not for your relationship- fine. It’s not a magic bullet for marital bliss. It takes someone who is nourished and fulfilled by being submissive (as well as for their partner to be nourished and fulfilled by being more dominant). Such a relationship is not for everyone – but sadly is often dismissed as even a possibility because it is so counter culture. I believe couples should feel free to find what fulfills them. If that’s a co-equal marriage, so be it. If it is a Dom/sub marriage, so be it. Thank you for the confidence to share your journey! Reply to Jennifer

Thank you for this, you are right it takes a strong woman to submit to her husband. I am not married but I am learning how to be a submissive wife when I am married. The idea of submission used to bother me and I would get grossed out but I am so glad I found out the true meaning.
Also I am a Christian woman as well.
I pray that you become a more submissive wife♥️ Reply to Jelaya

I honestly cannot believe some of the negative comments I have seen associated with this post. I have been struggling in my marriage with ours vs mine and yours, I felt like this post was written for me personally and I want to thank you for that. You know what they say, “Haters gonna Hate”. You clearly state that marriages are different and that this works for yours so it’s not like you are saying “Hey everyone, do this or your marriage will fail”. I struggled a bit with the title, but I am glad I took the opportunity to read what you wrote as well as in the comments, you address the word Submissive professionally and eloquently. Thank you so much for putting this out there despite negative feedback. Reply to Hailey

Mallory,
Morgan makes a great point. Just hear me out.
I can truly understand why she would make those comments. So many women work hard and decide to be vulnerable and let their husbands make the final decisions in the household. To the average woman, that’s just crazy!!! Well you’d have to be a little crazy to blindly trust God’s plan. Especially to follow the God-fearing man who HE has sent your life. Your story isn’t for women ONLY for those who want the Godly dream that is portrayed in the Bible. To be a Godly Submissive wife, you have to be wise enough trust in God’s plan for your marriage. There’s a great deal of women who choose to do what Eve did and step in front of their husbands and do it their way. awe talk about those women all the time, statically when discussing divorce. Some of us choose not to walk in Eve’s shoes over and over. Keep telling your story. Every story isn’t for everyone; just as success isn’t for everyone.
The problem is most women is they tend to define the word submissive not in the biblical context. It’s simply aligning yourself with the mission that your husband has for he family. Nothing else. They fight against it and fail to understand that bringing your husband a simple glass of water as he cuts the lawn can help accomplish the mission for that particular task. Reply to Tamara
Growing up, I was taught independence.
I was taught the importance of doing things on my own without having to rely on anyone but myself.
I still believe these are important characteristics; however, when they are ingrained into your being they can have a toxic affect on a marriage.
My husband and I have been together for 10 years.
We recently celebrated our three year wedding anniversary.
I’m going to be honest, year three was our hardest year.
After a disagreement, if his final decision was different than what I believed should happen, I felt as though I was being ignored.
I felt like my thoughts, feelings, and opinions did not matter. That made me bitter going into the next argument.
Then I realized, I wasn’t trusting my husband to be the leader of our family.
Holding a value of self-reliance was damaging my marriage.
I believed that I had to make the decisions. Believing that an individual must be independent, I had previously made all of the decisions for myself.
It wasn’t that I don’t trust my husband. Of course I do.
I was holding on to the fact that I was supposed to be in control of every aspect of my life. All I could think was, “how are we going to make it if I can’t allow my husband to lead our family?”
I was being a road block, and I didn’t want to be anymore. Little did I know that becoming a submissive wife was the answer to mutual respect.
I get that, and it is more than okay in this so called life. Let me say this first, as a disclaimer, I believe women have rights.
I believe they can work , climb corporate ladders, make decisions, obtain degrees and so much more.
With that being said, personally, I have always had a traditional view on marriage.
This view fits our family best. It works for us.
I believe the husband is the leader and final decision maker in the family unit.
Men are meant to love their wives. I believe that a wife is a sound voice, a different point of view, a supporter, and a caretaker. Women are meant to be submissive to their husbands.
Sounds like my view of marriage totally contradicts my instilled value of independence, right?!
It’s difficult to let my husband make the final decisions, when I was taught that I shouldn’t rely on anyone other than myself. I knew what I wanted for our marriage, but I was fighting against myself. So, I decided I was going to learn.
Yes, it sounds scary. It sounds old-school.
Being a submissive woman simply means serving your husband in a way that benefits your marriage. It means focusing on being your husband’s helper, lover, and biggest supporter.
It does not mean your husband is a tyrant, and you are a tiny peon that no longer has an opinion.
Instead, it means that after all has been discussed between you both, that you trust your husband to make the decision. Really, it takes some stress off of you as well!
As moms, we have enough decisions and deadlines to make. It’s okay to let our husbands do their part.
Being a submissive wife actually takes an extremely strong, confident, well-grounded woman.
Over the past several months, as a Christian woman I have been learning to submit to my husband.
I’ve failed many times. I’m stubborn with the best of them, my emotions get the best of me way more than they should, and I like to be right.
Still, I come back to the fact that I believe my husband should be the head of our household. In order for that to happen, some personal changes had to be made.
Here are some things I’ve been working on:
As submissive wives, it is easy to have an opinion about everything. Take time to consider your words and reply with intent rather than emotion.
Give him the trust he deserves as the leader of your family. Let him lead. This is Gods word.
If a direction is taken that you have an opinion about or do not agree with, confront him in private. Do not confront him in front of others or the kids.
This is particularly difficult for me. I’m a worrier by nature.
If your husband is having a bad day or if you had an argument, give him some space. Trust him to talk when he’s ready.
It isn’t necessary to try to control your husband or his day.
You already have enough to control. Embrace the role of helper.
Ask how you can help his day go smoother. Ask what he needs done that he doesn’t have time to do.
Women are intuitive. When you notice something that would help your husband, do it.
My husband works his butt off for our family. I work, but he provides. This is my husband’s wishes for his family!
Without his hard work, my family would go without often. He makes sure we have everything we need and more.
As I’m picking up the dirty socks he leaves on the floor every single day, I get aggravated. Why?
In the grand scheme of things, why do dirty socks aggravate me? When I focus on being grateful (submission) for my husband and his hard work, the small things, like dirty socks, just don’t matter as much.
He is important. As a Christian marriage, we get into routines of packing lunches, shuttling kids to school, making meals, attending kid’s activities, etc. It’s endless. What about each other?
Bring him a glass of ice water when he’s working in the yard or his favorite snack while he’s on the sofa watching T.V. Small actions sometimes speak the loudest.
Trust your husband to listen to you. Trust your husband to seek knowledge from all sides. Trust your husband to make the decision.
There is no one-size-fits-all for marriage. Biblical submission works for us, and it might for you too. If not, I encourage you to find what does. Creating the outline of your marriage, helps guide you as you are filling in the paragraphs.
While I am aiming to be a submissive wife, I have by no means perfected it. I want to continue learning about a healthy marriage, my husband, and how we operate best. My main goal is a happy and healthy life with my husband and children.
I would love to hear your thoughts, tips, or what works for your marriage. Let’s talk about it!
Hi! My name is Mallory, and I am a 30-year-old wife, mommy, employee, PhD student, and blogger. We have two handsome little dudes, ages 4 and 6. They are full of wonderful and sometimes messy surprises. I am currently employed part time and enrolled in a PhD program for general psychology. As a blogger, my goal is to provide an outlet for moms to share, vent, learn, and laugh together!
We are a community of mamas who are imperfectly perfect! We share tips to help you be a loving, sharing, inspiring, hopeful, funny and wonderful mom. →

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This month’s challenge: 25 Things About You and Your Submission

Since this is the introductory Blog Hop on Submissive Guide I want you to sort of introduce yourself and share some interesting things about yourself and your submission. You can choose to focus on anything you wish as long as you stay within the topic.

What do you feel is the most valuable asset you have to offer your Dominant? Explain why. This isn’t a simple journal prompt. Challenge answers should be well thought out. Try to really get down to the heart of your submission and describe your asset and you explanation.

Submission is often described as the most precious gift a submissive can offer a Dominant. Others don’t believe that submission is a gift at all. What is your opinion about this? Once you have an opinion, then consider the other opinion and talk about how they could or could not be right as well. How would you describe your submission to your Dominant?

Is there anything about submission (yours or what you see in others) that you question, dislike or repels you? Was there a time you questioned or were resistant to your own submissive feelings?

What brings out your most powerful submissive/slave mindset? Is it a regular occurrence in your life or do you long for that submissive/slave feeling more often?

Share a time where you felt your most submissive.

We all have people in our lives that we admire, emulate or respect. Tell us about a couple submissives that you currently look up to and why.

7 Things You Have Learned From A Dominant About Submission

You don’t have to be in a relationship for this one but it helps if you know or at least talk to a Dominant for the challenge.

Can you think of 7 things you have learned about your submission or submission in general from a Dominant? Why is it important to look to Dominants for insights on ourselves? What makes learning from them different than learning from other submissives?

Characteristics Essential to Ownership

What qualities or character traits does an Owner (Dominant/Partner) need to have in order to gain your consent to serve? Name at least three of these qualities and explain why you feel they are important.

[This challenge is from Where I Am Led: A Service Exploration Workbook by Christina "slavette" Parker]

Do you have a ritual that reminds you of your submission or your relationship dynamic each and every time you do it? How did it get started? What does the ritual entail?

Pick out one of the 3 free ebooks available on the site and review it. Share what you do and don’t like about it and how you use it in your own journey.

Making Online Submission Work for You, Wants and Needs, 20 Things You Can Do Today to Improve Your Submission: (available when you sign up for the newsletter)

Review of 20 Things You Can Do Today to Improve Your Submission

Are you a quiet obedient submissive or is there an element of playful brattiness in your dynamic? How would you describe your submissive personality? How does your owner encourage or enhance who you are?

How do you resolve anger in your relationship? What if the Dominant has angered you, how do you handle it? What methods do you recommend people try to calm down and resolve conflict without anger?

Do you have a safeword? When was the last time you used it? Are you afraid to say your safeword for fear of appearing weak? What are you indicators that a scene has gone too far and you need to safeword?

Do you make New Year’s Resolutions?

If so, what goals did you set for yourself this year? How are you doing with keeping them?

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Submissive Journey Weekend
April 13-16, 2023

Team Meeting (facilitated small group)
Service Stations: choose up to 3 of 4 half hour skills-based classes
Class Session: choose 1 of 3 classes
Class Session: choose 1 of 3 classes
Class Session: choose 1 of 3 classes
Class Session: choose 1 of 3 classes
Lunch/Ask it Basket: Ask it basket is an anonymous way for attendees to get group feedback on questions they may have
Class Session: choose 1 of 3 classes

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