Stuff Panties In Pussy
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Stuff Panties In Pussy
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August 10, 2022
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V aginas are not meant to be storage units. They are not meant to be purses. They are not meant to be secret hiding places. You are not supposed to put unsterilized foreign objects in them. Most of us understand these rules. But you’d be surprised. Some women cannot be stopped from violating the terms and conditions of their vaginas. If you dare, click through to see the weirdest things women have stashed in their kitties, the poor things.
Riddle me this: What do you do when you are on probation and need to pass a urine test, but aren’t clean? You hide a small vodka bottle with someone else’s urine in your vagina! At least, this was Mischelle Lindy Salzgeber’s solution to her problem. The jig was up when the bottle was discovered during a routine body scan. Oh, and too bad the urine she borrowed to pass as her own tested positive for drugs anyway. [ Huffington Post ]
Pennsylvania woman Karin Mackaliunas wins the award for most stuff stored in a vagina EVER . During a routine strip search, authorities discovered 54 bags of heroin, 31 empty heroin bags, eight prescription pills, and $51.22 in cash and change in her vagina. Why bother with a purse when you can carry everything you need between your legs?
Dr. Melissa Barton sees a lot of odd stuff as an ER doctor. But the oddest she ever saw (pun intended) was a woman who had placed a prosthetic eyeball in her vagina for “safe keeping.” Why, you ask? Oh, she was preparing to have a fight with her neighbors and she told Dr. Barton that glass eyes “are pretty expensive and hard to replace.” I believe this earns her the nickname “Eyegina.” [ Asia One ]
Of all the inconceivable phallic objects a desperately horny person could shove up in their vagina, a rolled-up Donny Osmond poster is not the first thing that comes to mind. A U.K. woman featured on the BBC3 show called “Bizarre ER” did just that. Doctors discovered a rolled-up poster of Donny Osmond shoved inside her vagina. I have many questions about this. Firstly, did she forget she put it in there? And are we talking life-size poster or one of those Tiger Beat tear sheets? I need more details. Also, ouch. [ Mirror ]
Are your legs crossed? OK. Here we go. Two Florida women got in a drug-fueled fight over some prescription pills. Once arrested, police found one had a knife and a bottle of prescription pills hidden in her belly fat rolls. Wait … there’s more. A thorough cavity search revealed a second knife … hidden in her vagina. You can scream now. [ True Crime Report ]
The only thing about stealing a cell phone and hiding it in your vadge is that when it rings, other people are going to hear it. That’s what happened to Ruxandra Gardian, the Romanian woman whose vagina rang. Once authorities discerned where the ringing was coming from, the owner declined to take it back. I think that was a good call. Heh. [ The Register ]
Another Florida woman, another strange object hidden in a vagina. Ann Marie Hernandez made a sizable Home Depot haul with a fraudulent credit card. When she was done with her shopping spree, she loaded the goods into her car and the credit card into her vagina. Vaginas make awful wallets. [Hispanically Speaking News]
Arlina Romero also had a stolen credit card on her person when cops caught her leaving a flophouse. Instead of hiding the credit card in her vagina like Ann Hernandez, she put it in her pocket. Good move, Arlina! But this story doesn’t end well. There was something else hidden in her vagina. A crack pipe. [NBC]
© 2022 - All Right Reserved.
TheFrisky.com is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com. Amazon, the Amazon logo, AmazonSupply, and the AmazonSupply logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates.
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The year 2017 was a rough year for vaginas. Between constantly facing threats to limit access to reproductive and sexual health care to being bombarded with terrible advice regarding what to stick up there (cucumbers, glitter, jade eggs , VapoRub, wasp nest and far too many others) to living under a president who bragged about grabbing them, people with vaginas have had a lot to think about. On the bright side, though, we brought the word out of the shadows (it’s a legitimate medical term after all) and went one step further, clarifying that there’s a difference between the vagina, vulva and labia (despite the fact that they’re typically grouped together).
Aside from succumbing to the barrage of vaginal quackery out there ( ahem, Goop ), we now know a bit more about some of the other missteps in that area — specifically, objects people got stuck in their vaginas that landed them in the emergency room. The source of this information is the National Electronic Injury Surveillance System — a database listing the reasons behind ER visits compiled by the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission.
The latest information available is for 2016, and here are some of the more unusual findings:
A woman was masturbating using the handle of a hairbrush, which broke off and was lodged inside her, prompting a hospital visit.
While at home eating a lollipop, the stick broke off; so one women put the stick inside her vagina.
Following doing cocaine using a straw, a woman inserted the drinking straw into her vagina when the police arrived.
A woman hid a plastic baggie of marijuana in her vagina. (The report did not specify whether it was Ilana from Broad City .)
Somehow, a woman got the top of a spray bottle stuck in her vagina, then attempted to take it out at home.
A 12-year-old girl was playing with clay in the bathtub and got it stuck in her vagina.
No additional details on this one, but it was probably a makeshift dildo.
This is a tricky one because the object stuck in there actually is approved for use in vaginas. The problem arose when the string holding 15 balls together dissolved and the woman could only locate 14 of them.
Yes, this sounds straight out of an episode of Seinfeld , but in reality, a woman inserted a non-birth control sponge into her vagina so she could swim while she had her period.
Another makeshift dildo situation, which did not have a happy ending.
And remember: There are plenty of things that can go inside your vagina, so please stick to items on this doctor-approved list and enjoy yourself — safely.
The stories you care about, delivered daily.
SheKnows is a part of Penske Media Corporation. © 2022 SheMedia, LLC. All Rights Reserved.
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Getty Images/Design: Ashley Britton/SheKnows
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Tags
health and wellness
masturbation
pelvic health
More Stories from Health & Wellness
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Gold Derby
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Spy
StyleCaster
The Hollywood Reporter
TVLine
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SheKnows is a part of Penske Media Corporation. © 2022 SheMedia, LLC. All Rights Reserved.
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The year 2017 was a rough year for vaginas. Between constantly facing threats to limit access to reproductive and sexual health care to being bombarded with terrible advice regarding what to stick up there (cucumbers, glitter, jade eggs , VapoRub, wasp nest and far too many others) to living under a president who bragged about grabbing them, people with vaginas have had a lot to think about. On the bright side, though, we brought the word out of the shadows (it’s a legitimate medical term after all) and went one step further, clarifying that there’s a difference between the vagina, vulva and labia (despite the fact that they’re typically grouped together).
Aside from succumbing to the barrage of vaginal quackery out there ( ahem, Goop ), we now know a bit more about some of the other missteps in that area — specifically, objects people got stuck in their vaginas that landed them in the emergency room. The source of this information is the National Electronic Injury Surveillance System — a database listing the reasons behind ER visits compiled by the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission.
The latest information available is for 2016, and here are some of the more unusual findings:
A woman was masturbating using the handle of a hairbrush, which broke off and was lodged inside her, prompting a hospital visit.
While at home eating a lollipop, the stick broke off; so one women put the stick inside her vagina.
Following doing cocaine using a straw, a woman inserted the drinking straw into her vagina when the police arrived.
A woman hid a plastic baggie of marijuana in her vagina. (The report did not specify whether it was Ilana from Broad City .)
Somehow, a woman got the top of a spray bottle stuck in her vagina, then attempted to take it out at home.
A 12-year-old girl was playing with clay in the bathtub and got it stuck in her vagina.
No additional details on this one, but it was probably a makeshift dildo.
This is a tricky one because the object stuck in there actually is approved for use in vaginas. The problem arose when the string holding 15 balls together dissolved and the woman could only locate 14 of them.
Yes, this sounds straight out of an episode of Seinfeld , but in reality, a woman inserted a non-birth control sponge into her vagina so she could swim while she had her period.
Another makeshift dildo situation, which did not have a happy ending.
And remember: There are plenty of things that can go inside your vagina, so please stick to items on this doctor-approved list and enjoy yourself — safely.
The stories you care about, delivered daily.
SheKnows is a part of Penske Media Corporation. © 2022 SheMedia, LLC. All Rights Reserved.
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