Stretch Sex

Stretch Sex

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Do your legs ever cramp up in the middle of sex? Do you find certain positions challenging? Can you feel your limited flexibility limiting the range of your sex life?
People hold on to a lot of stored tension in their bodies… tension that blocks the natural flow of sexual energy.
By releasing the stored tension, you’ll enjoy more fulfilling sex, more powerful orgasms, and find it easier to last throughout you and your partner’s multi-hour sex sessions.
Tightness in your hips is a common limiter of a deeply free and rewarding sex life.
For this stretch, lie on your back on a comfortable surface, place the outside of your ankle just under your knee, at the top of your thigh. Interlock your fingers underneath your thigh, and gently pull your leg towards you. Make sure you keep the toes of your overlapped leg engaged by pointing them towards your knee (to avoid injuring your bent knee).
You should feel this stretch opening up your hip flexors. When you’ve sat in this position for 20-60 seconds, switch sides and do it with your other leg over the adjacent knee.
This stretch is a multi-purpose beast.
It stretches your chest, neck and hips… and it strengthens your glutes, back, and hamstrings.
To execute the bridge pose, lie on your back on the ground (if the bare ground is too much, lie down on a yoga mat ) with your feet shoulder width apart. Keep your neck and shoulders pretty firmly into the ground, while you lift your hips to the sky until your torso and thighs are a straight line.
Few things are worse than getting a cramp in your jaw when you’re going down on your partner.
To give your jaw muscles more lasting power, and to avoid any neck, shoulder or jaw tension during the most intimate of acts, regularly massage your jaw by doing the following.
Open your mouth wide (but not forcibly wide) and massage the area around your jaw that roughly correspond to the bottom of your ears. You can either massage the area gently, or consistently apply pressure with your fingers in the area and hold for 30 seconds (ie. acupressure) and then release.
To alleviate stored tension in your hamstrings, neck, and back, slowly fold your body forwards and allow yourself to hang loosely. You can grab on to your ankles/calves and pull yourself down further to increase the intensity of the stretch. Hold for 20-60 seconds, and feel free to do multiple rounds of this.
This exercise is especially important for tall people, for people who have sedentary lifestyles and/or sit at a desk in their day job.
Years ago, before I started deep diving into health , nutrition , Taoist sexual philosophy , and all of that other good stuff, I would frequently get foot cramps during sex or immediately after having an orgasm. Which sucked. Because foot cramps suck, and they really kill the mood.
To alleviate stored tension in your feet (which, believe me, you likely have a lot more of than you might assume you do) spend a few minutes per day stepping on either a golf ball, or a spiky acupressure ball ( like this one ).
You’ll be amazed how much stored tension is actually in your foot. You’ll be amazed at how crunchy the soles of your feet sound when you really start applying pressure into them. And you’ll be amazed at how much tension drops out of your entire body (and not just in your feet) when you release stored foot tension.
This is because a lot of the fascial tissue in your body connects to the soles of your feet. By releasing the pressure at this important focal point, you can alleviate tension in your neck, shoulders, lower back, and hamstrings by association. Sounds like magic, but it’s true.
Spend 1-3 minutes a day putting your weight on this little spiky ball , and you’ll have a more pain-free, tension-free existence in no time.
(If cramping is a huge issue for you during sex, make sure you’re consuming magnesium , electrolytes , and drinking lots of water on a daily basis.)
Calves and hamstrings are another common area of the body that stores a lot of tension that gets in the way of a flexibly free sex life.
To give your calves a thorough and relaxing stretch, lie on your back, wrap your rope around the middle of your foot, extend your leg, and pull back gently on the rope with your hands.
Work with the positioning until you find a good stretch for you (always listen to your body, and don’t pull too hard) and allow yourself to sink into it for a good 20-60 seconds.
Once you feel satisfied with one side, switch the rope to the other side and give the other leg a stretch. Doing your calf stretches regularly also gives you tangential benefits in your glutes, lower back, and neck.
The spiky ball isn’t just for relieving stored fascial tension in your feet… it can also be used all over your body for other common problem areas.
Another place that people tend to store a lot of physical tension is in their hips and glutes (again, especially if you sit down a lot on a daily basis).
Either using a normal massage ball , or a spiky massage ball (the spiky ball is considerably more intense) roll out the tension in your hips and glutes in a slow and methodical way. Take deep breaths while you’re doing these tension relieving poses. Allow your body weight to sink down and let gravity do the work for you.
If you’re in the habit of regularly listening to your body, you’re likely already aware of which problem spots need the most love from you.
If your stored tension is primarily in your neck, start with tips 4 and 5.
If your stored tension is primarily in your glutes, start with tips 4 and 7.
If your stored tension is primarily in your back, start with tips 2 and 6.
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Zachary Zane
Zachary Zane is a Brooklyn-based writer, speaker, and activist whose work focuses on lifestyle, sexuality, and culture. He was formerly the digital associate editor at OUT Magazine and currently has a queer cannabis column, Puff Puff YASS, at Civilized.

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The best workout motivation of all!
There are a number of ways to get better at sex . One is practice: The more sex you have, the more you learn about it—assuming you’re being communicative and are open to trying new things. Another is exercising certain muscle groups to build strength, flexibility, and stamina. There’s a reason why most porn stars have ridiculously toned bodies!
Being in shape helps if you’re going to try certain positions (like standing missionary ) and if you want to have vigorous sex for more than 10 minutes. We reached out to two fitness coaches: Lauren Sambataro , a certified personal trainer, corrective exercise specialist, functional diagnostic nutrient coach, and functional health coach (CHEK, NASM, FDN, IFHC) and Shaun Leary , a certified personal trainer (NASM, CPT) to learn how to train for better sex.
If you're doing sex right, it engages the whole body—but there are four specific muscle groups that take on the bulk of the work: glutes; quads; core; and upper body. “Sex is basically a hip thrusting workout,” Sambataro says. “Glutes act on the hip through the action of extension, which is why a hip flexor stretch is equally as important as strengthening the glutes.” Quads are involved in hip flexion, working in opposition to the glutes. "Quads are a good mix of fast-twitch (strength producing) and slow-twitch (endurance producing) muscles, but for sexual purposes, you probably need the endurance (i.e, slow twitch muscles) the most."
Strengthening your core helps you use your other muscles and body parts more efficiently. "Core also strengthens stamina, allowing you to perform much longer,” Sambataro explains. Last but not least, it’s crucial to have a strong upper body for sex, because it supports the weight of your (or your partner's) body. “A strong upper body takes the load off of the legs to allow freedom of movement and mobility," she says. "For kinkier positions, the upper body will support you, upside-down, sideways and backwards.”
Stretching is important, too; a lack of mobility can be a huge bummer once you’re in the mood and the hormones are surging. “Having more mobility and flexibility helps to seamlessly move through positions,” Leary says. Plus, you don’t want to pull anything while in the middle of intercourse.
Here are some specific exercises and stretches recommended by Sambataro and Leary that translate to the bedroom.
How to: It’s just like a plank, except instead of holding the position, you rotate forward and backward on your feet. (For position details, head here .)
What it targets: “The FBPS stabilizes the core musculature through a dynamic range of motion, and clearly mimics the classic missionary position,” Sambataro says.
How to: We all know how to do a pushup, but head here to perfect your form. When done correctly, pushups don’t just strengthen your chest, they strengthen your entire upper body.
What it targets: “Pushups are an upper body workout that will easily help increase your overall stamina in bed,” Leary says.
How to: There are over a dozen variations of squats. Head here to learn which type of squat is best for your body.
What it targets: “Doing squats, whether with dumbbells or a barbell, are very effective, working your glutes, hamstrings, and quads,” Leary says. “During positions such as reverse cowboy, having strong legs are necessary for endurance.”
How to: Place your upper back on a bench with a barbell across your hips. While keeping your feet planted, drive your hips upward, squeezing your glutes throughout. (For position details, head here .)
What it targets: Hip thrusts target your glutes. “They’re great for cowgirl/cowboy,” Sambataro explains. Specifically, this exercise is great if you're penetrating your partner from the bottom— like in the Pearly Gates position .
How to: You load a hex bar with weight, grab it with a shoulder-width grip, plant your feet on the floor, and lift while keeping your back straight. (For more details, head here .)
What it targets: “Deadlifts target the entire lower chain, most specifically the back and glutes,” Sambataro says. “Training with the hex bar can reduce back injuries and encourage power in the legs.”
How to: Hold a dumbbell in each hand at your sides, with palms facing your hips (inward). During the lift, keep your elbows locked so that only your forearms move. Curl the weights up until your thumbs are near your shoulders, then lower. (For more details, head here .)
What it targets: Hammer curls strengthen your biceps. “In positions like suspended congress (aka standing missionary ) where the dominant person is holding up the submissive person, having strong forearms and biceps come in handy,” Leary says. “When looking at this position, it looks like a static bicep curl hold.”
How to: There are many different workouts one can do for HIIT sprints. Head here to learn 11 of our favorite HIIT sprints at Men’s Health.
What it targets: “HIIT training helps with cardiovascular endurance and enhances one of the most important aspects of sexual function: blood flow!” Sambataro says. “It’s great for an extended session in the sack.”
How to: Even though swinging a kettlebell between your legs may look simple, it’s easy to do incorrectly. Head here to learn how do a kettlebell swing safely.
What it targets: “Kettlebell swings increase glute strength while training power and speed; this allows the hips to forcefully and quickly thrust, which is helpful for positions like doggy style,” Sambataro explains.
How to: Bend your front leg to 90 degrees and have your back leg fully extend out behind you. For a deeper stretch, drop your back knee down to the floor, pressing your hips towards the floor. ( Head here for more details.)
What it targets: “These are good for if you are the dominant position in a sexual encounter, and are on your knees thrusting for a long period,” says Leary. “Runner’s lunges will help lengthen your hip flexors and keep them from getting tight during sexual intercourse."
How to: Start in a pushup position. Then step forward with the left leg to the outside of the left hand. From here, you can drive your hips forward, delving deep into the stretch. Hold here, and then return to your starting position. Repeat with the right leg. ( Head here for more details.)
What it targets: “The Spiderman stretch concurrently stretches the muscles of the hip, legs, groin, and lats,” Sambataro says.
How to: From downward-facing dog, inhale and rock your body forward into a high-plank position. Align your shoulders, hips, and heels, keeping your core and quads engaged. Exhale and roll forward onto your toes. (Head here for more details.)
What it targets: “Upward-facing dog concurrently stretches and opens the chest and spine, while strengthening the arms, shoulders, and wrists,” Sambataro says.
How to: Lie on your back with your feet flat on the floor. Cross your left ankle over your right knee and then bring your right knee into your chest. Hold the position for roughly a minute. Then switch sides. ( Head here for more details.)
What it targets: “The figure four stretch is a deep hip-opener,” Sambataro says. “It can be done laying supine (on the back) or standing (best to hold onto something for support).”

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S tretching does a whole lot of good for your body. It helps you avoid injuries, minimizes post-workout soreness , and can even improve your athletic performance. In fact, it's so important that there are now entire boutique classes dedicated to it . But its benefits don't just stop at your fitness routine—it can also majorly improve your sex life.
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When you're having fun between the sheets, you want to feel your best—and that means not dealing with cramps from being too tight during new positions or, you know, pulling a muscle. Plus, aside from being able to make your way through your Kama Sutra book pain-free to figure out what works best for you and your partner, you'll also be able to strengthen your bond since increased flexibility can bring you closer together literally and figuratively.
If anyone knows how to improve your sex life thr
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