Spy Dad Shower
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Spy Dad Shower
Comment deleted by user · 2 yr. ago
This group is a place to share study and understand the role both past and present of communal showers within American society.
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I saw a post before here about comfort level in communal showers. I agreed with the author in that I am comfortable showering with strangers or close friends. Less so with men I know from work but I am not close with. However, I was in a park a while ago and went to change and shower with my dad there. The showers were open and there were several other men there. For some reason, I surprised myself being super uncomfortable. I had never seen my father naked before, and while I might have been curious about what he looked like compared to me, I quickly showered, did the towel dance and left quickly.
Have any of you had a similar experience? I often see fathers and sons in the communal shower at the pool with a lot of comfort. I was just surprised about my reaction to my dad. I am 30 y.o and live in the U.S.
I literally grew up using communal showers with my dad at the campground we camped at every summer. My dad and I saw each other naked at home almost everyday when i was growing up until around when i moved out. It was just me and him so nudity was no big deal with us.
Yeah it sounds like if dads are comfortable then we are. I never saw my dad naked growing up. Hence why I was so uncomfortable in the locker room with him
When I was about 5 years old we lived in a home with an unfinished basement. There were water pipes running along the unfinished ceiling along floor joists holding up the main floor. Near the center of the basement was a shower head installed on the pipes. There was a drain in the floor under the shower head. It was out in the open with no curtain or anything.
I still remember one time my father took me down to the basement for a father and son shower. That was the only time that anyone used the basement shower as far as I know. I have a vague feeling that mother may have objected, but it might have been that the floor drain didn't connect to anything and the shower caused some flooding. A couple of years later we moved to a different house.
One other time my father took me for a weekend at a beach resort without mother, sister, or baby brother. We stayed in a little cabin together. The 1940s "Motel" style cabins all shared a central shower room. My father and I went and showered together. He hadn't brought any towels so we had to put our clothes back on wet. The lack of packing up leads me to think there may have been some fight between him and mom, we left home in sort of a hurry without a lot of preparation, hence no towels and not much extra clothes either. I was about 4 or 5.
My own sons I took them to the city swimming pool and shared the showers with them several times. I also took them to nudist resorts where we shared common showers. But home showers usually aren't large enough for 2 men, so home showers were usually single.
My dad routinely took baths with my brother and sister and I when we were toddlers. (Not all at the same time.) In later childhood through my teens I went on extended camping trips with my family and I showered with my father many times. On at least one occasion when we were running late, my father and I shared a shower stall. I enjoyed those experiences. I have a feeling that my father would probably have been a nudist if not for my extremely prudish mother.
I go to Korean spas quite often, or I used to before the beginning of the pandemic. Korean fathers bring their sons to the spas regularly, and they very often wash each other at the sit-down showers.
Yeah I've noticed that in the Korean spas and even at the YMCA pool. Did that relationship with your dad affected your comfort level with communal showers later on?
I think the answer is in your comment that you had never seen your father naked before...so at 30 it was a new and awkward experience! I grew up in a household where nudity was just normal...from the youngest age I saw my father and mother naked, so when it was time for first communal shower (13) it was no big deal. By that point I had already done communal showers with my grandfather and an uncle too.
pretty normal to me. Growing up I remember using open showers with my dad and brother after swimming at his athletic club. I also remember using an open shower/changing area after a kayaking trip with them when I was older.
yeah, it sounds like guys that grew up seeing their dad naked are comfortable with them in a communal shower setting. I am getting the sense that us that did not are uncomfortable
I did shower with my dad as a small child a few times but it ended when I was 5 or 6. Ive seen lots of father son showering in Iceland but less common in the US though my gym has rigid age segregation so it’s less likely to see
It is very common is some cultures. In Iceland and Finland, it seems most do it. I think they have much healthier relationships with their bodies because of it.
Yeah, I think in traditional gyms in uncommon because you don't see many minors in general. but I have seen several times dads and sons of all ages at communal showers at the pool, water park, etc. places where families go to.
yeah an uncle would be weird for me too. it's just interesting because I am comfortable with any other men naked in a communal setting, but when I think my dad and even uncles (or brothers in law) it gets weird.
and yeah, dad was weird about it too...
Fathers need to shower with boys and girls beginning at a young age. The child needs to gain knowledge of his or her species. and understanding of parental care.
Homes need to be built with large bathrooms and showers big enough for 2 or more.
Homes need to be built with large bathrooms and showers big enough for 2 or more.
Love the idea. I personally believe, and have believed for years now, in replacing all bathrooms in one's home with one single coed locker room for the whole family plus guests. I mean I call it a locker room because that's what it essentially is, but I don't think it should have actual lockers because if you're home you have your stuff nearby and nobody's going to steal your undies or towel. My whole comment is a trip down this road so heads up.
Just put 1 or 2 small benches in there, an open/communal shower for 2 or 3, 1 or 2 toilets enclosed in stalls, 1 or 2 sinks with a big mirror behind them, a vertical mirror somewhere else for full outfit self-evaluation, maybe a trough or a couple urinals for quick and practical use with a lot less water waste, and a cabinet for, like, hair and skin products, cleaning stuff, and meds. Basically merge 2 or 3 bathrooms into one with all their shared facilities.
This locker room should be accessible from the living room or a hall that any person living there or visiting can access. Additionally I'd make sure to include an extra door leading straight to the master bedroom, and this one should be able to be locked from the bedroom's side for privacy reasons.
I've never heard of home locker rooms being "in", in any period or country. But then again I'm not an architect, interior designer, civil engineer, so what the hell do I know. I just think that showering, shaving and just being nude (whether during the quick process of changing clothes or by its own virtue as a nudist lifestyle) are tasks as mundane as eating a meal in the kitchen or playing a game or watching tv in the living room. Nothing that needs to be strictly private about those.
In fact even bodily functions regarding waste don't carry any kind of inherent need to be private; in other words, I don't have a good reason why they should be concealed. Instead of proposing that both be done in full view though, I think peeing in full view is okay but toilets need to be in stalls. In an effort to be as honest as I possibly can, I must confess I have no actually good arguments for this other than an aesthetic perspective: I subjectively find evacuating disgusting and I want it to remain hidden, so that's where I draw the line. You can shower, shave and pee in front of me but please build a stall and close the door when you need to poop.
He might be the only man with whom I'm deeply uncomfortable on the subject of casual nudity.
Yeah! I know friends that are very uncomfortable with casual nudity in locker rooms but see their dad naked at home all the time (and vice versa)
Probably because you didn't have the experience as a child.
how about uncles? or other family members or authority figures?
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