Sph Kink

Sph Kink
Plus, how to navigate a degrading kink and a creepy father.

I am a pretty handsome gay and I am dating a gorgeous man. I am bottom only, and he is top only — so it’s a good match. He seems sincerely interested in me and we are talking about being together. But here is the thing: He noticed that I have a rather small penis. I am under the average, and his dick is quite big and long. Since he discovered this, he fancies about “humiliating” me about my “small pee-pee.” He would even like me to show it to his friends. I am not ashamed of the size of my penis because it’s how I am made and I can’t change it. But I wonder what this idea means for him. Is it a common turn-on for some top guys to imagine that their partner is smaller than them? Does it hide something else maybe?

Small penis humiliation (SPH) is a kink popular enough to have spawned a porn genre. There are more than 76,000 SPH-themed porn videos on XTube. Small penis humiliation is definitely a thing. And it can be a very good thing for guys whose erotic imaginations transformed their anxieties about having small dicks into a kink they enjoy.

But you are not one of those guys. You like your dick fine, and you’ve got the exact right attitude about your dick.

It’s usually the guy with the small dick who initiates small penis humiliation games with his partner, HOT, not the boyfriend with the bigger dick.

But the issue here isn’t stumbling over a rare small penis humiliation top in the wild, HOT, but whether or not you’re into it. Are you into power play? Do you like being degraded? Does the thought of this dude ordering you to show your dick to his friends turn you on in any way? If the answer is no, no, and FUCK NO, then tell your potential new boyfriend to stop making fun of your cock. If the answer is maybe, maybe, and maybe under the right circumstances, then talk it over with him and work out when, where, and how you’re willing to indulge his SPH kink.

It’s worrisome that this guy didn’t bother with obtaining your consent in advance, HOT, and if he doesn’t recognize that he made a mistake and swear not to make a similar mistake in the future, well, then you’ll have to DTMFA.

I’m sorry to be graphic, but it can’t be avoided. I’d like to have my fiancé come on my pussy and then have someone else lick it off. My two questions: (1) Does that fall in the realm of safe sex for the extra person involved? (2) How do we find that person? Is there an app to meet a third or how do we find swinger parties in our area? Is that a degrading thing to ask someone to do?

— Personally Understands Serious
Sexual Yearnings

1. Nope. Various sexually transmitted infections — gonorrhea, syphilis, chlamydia, herpes, HPV, etc. — could be contracted by the extra person and/or passed on to you and your fiancé. There’s low to no risk for HIV, PUSSY, but the act nevertheless falls outside the realm of safe sex. Very little actually exists in the realm of purely safe sex. There’s always risk, we can mitigate for those risks, we can make sex safer, but save for solo and cyber, sex is rarely ever 100 percent safe.

2. This is technically three questions, PUSSY. You find that person by putting ads on hookup sites and/or by putting yourselves in places where you might meet that person, i.e., pick-up joints, sex parties, swinger’s clubs. There are lots of apps out there for couples seeking thirds, you can even advertise as a couple seeking a third on big dating sites like OkCupid. It is a degrading thing to ask someone to do — but since there are lots of people out there into erotic degradation, that’s a potential selling point.

I am in a relationship with a lovely and amazing man. Everything could be really good, if only his father would stop being a creep. He’s constantly telling me how beautiful, smart, and attractive I am. When I told him again to stop commenting on my appearance, he responded that I must like myself very much. I talked to my boyfriend’s mother, and she said she’s “given up” and ignores her husband’s behavior. It turns out that he behaved similarly with ex-girlfriends of my boyfriend’s brothers. I’m so angry and don’t know what to do. My boyfriend supports me, but it’s hard to talk about the topic, because it’s his father.

— Fucking Annoyed That He
Engrosses Rightfulness

I’m curious what your boyfriend’s “support” looks like, FATHER. Does he tell you privately that his father is a creep and that he wishes his dad would knock this shit off? Or does he tell his father directly that he’s being a creep and insist he knock it off? The latter is support, the former is not.

I’m thinking there’s a reason your boyfriend’s brothers only have ex-girlfriends — you don’t speak of any currents, FATHER, a highly revealing detail — and it’s not just because their dad is a creep. It’s because no one in the family is willing to stand up to this creep. If your boyfriend refuses to run interference and/or shut his father down, I would advise you to join the list of exes. However, “lovely and amazing” your boyfriend might be when you two are alone, if he’s useless in the face of his father’s sexual harassment, you’ll have to DTMFA, too.

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We all have humiliating moments in our heads that torture us when we think about them. Whether that’s falling down in front of your crush in high school, flubbing a presentation or even a messy bottoming experience. Turns out for some though humiliation doesn’t equate to bad. Today we’ll be giving you the rundown on the wonderful world of Humiliation Kinks.
Humiliation kinks or as they’re more commonly referred to as, Humiliation play, is an erotic kink where an individual gets aroused by being, what they deem to be, humiliated. This kink is up for interpretation by the individual as being “humiliated” is subjective and differs person to person. Here are just a couple of examples of the types of humiliation play that get people’s rocks off.
2. Forms of Physical Degradation. With the humiliation kink, sometimes the submissive partner may be “punished” for not doing something up to their dom’s satisfaction. Such as, for example, licking a shoe, the floor or something else. This can go further and spill (no pun intended) into other types of kinks like water sports. These forms of degradation aren’t just in the bedroom either. I’ll never forget I was 3 drinks in at the local gay bar a few summers ago when I needed to use the bathroom. I went down the stairs to the restroom line and at the bottom of the stairs was a dom and her submissive. A woman in latex with a muscular, grown man on a leash on all fours. She must’ve seen the look of surprise on my face. I wasn’t judging, just didn’t expect to see a scene like that whilst “Me Too” by Meghan Trainor faintly plays in the background, you know? Anyways, she told me that her submissive partner was on punishment and had been walked around the gay village all night acting like a dog to humilate him. She then instructed him to lick my shoe, to which he obliged to before I could decline the offer. Let’s just say I left the gay bar with cleaner shoes than I entered with, which is a rarity.

Home Featured Why Sexual Humiliation Can Be So Damn Hot
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Do you ever find yourself lying in your bed, thinking back to every possible instance where you’ve felt humiliated? Wincing while remembering the most embarrassing and demeaning moments of your life?
Like, maybe you had some toilet paper stuck to your pants when you walked out of your highschool bathroom. It happens, right? But, oh, no , someone noticed it! What’s more, they pointed it out to the entire school! The horror !
Or perhaps your crush publicly rejected and ridiculed you in front of a huge crowd? That’s humiliation. Most people try their best to avoid it. No wonder, right? The negative feelings of embarrassment, shame, and dread that usually follow are a nightmare to most people.
However, some people get off on it. Have you ever felt that delicious pang of sexual arousal while you’ve been remembering those situations? Then you might be into humiliation play.
What pops into your mind when you hear the words “sexual masochism?” Pain, probably, right? But there’s so much more to sexual masochism than mere pain and torture. After all, words can sometimes hurt more than anything else, right?
Sexual humiliation is a form of sexual masochism. It’s usually a part of a dominant-submissive arrangement. The more dominant partner humiliates and embarrasses the submissive one for the sake of sexual arousal and gratification.
In other words, some people simply love being verbally, physically, and psychologically humiliated. This results in enormous sexual arousal that they can’t achieve in any other way.
Now, although erotic humiliation has fascinated people for years, there isn’t much research about it. We don’t know precisely why some people like it. That’s especially weird considering that humiliation is a fairly popular kink. But then again, it doesn’t really matter, does it?
If you like something and your partner is willing and able to give it to you (in other words, if everything is safe, sane, and consensual), then every sexual act you can think of is perfectly fine and acceptable. There’s no kink-shaming in the BDSM community!
Erotic humiliation has to be done with the informed consent of all parties. What’s more, it isn’t something that you can jump into without a lengthy discussion.
Just like any other kink, humiliation demands negotiations. One person might find being called a filthy whore, for example, to be just the right amount of humiliation, while someone else might see that as nothing more than light dirty talk.
So you have to figure out what works for you (and your partner) and set soft and hard limits.
Also, if you’re a complete novice in the world of humiliation, you’re probably wondering what’s it all about. What does it look like? What does it feel like? What do partners say and do to each other?
Overall, we can split humiliation play into two categories — verbal and physical. There are also several levels of intensity when it comes to humiliation play.
There’s the lowest, mildest level, which is embarrassment. Then there’s the run-of-the-mill humiliation, as well as degradation and dehumanization. The latter two are the more intense and not something you should jump into right off the bat.
The thing about the humiliation kink is that it’s extremely specific. You might think that being called a slut in bed is extremely embarrassing. But your partner might not agree.
That’s why negotiating before playing is vital. You have to find the right words and actions that are both erotic (that entice arousal) and embarrassing or humiliation for humiliation play to be successful.
Physical humiliation often includes a reversal of gender roles. Making a man do housework (usually in the nude and on all fours) will probably be a real hit. What’s more, making men wear women’s clothing — short skirts, women’s lingerie, stockings, and even high heels — is another popular form of physical humiliation. Putting men in a cuckold position is another example (albeit an extreme one).
Even something minor can be a form of humiliation. Making your partner wait for ten or more minutes before you open the door to let them in, for example. Or making them crawl instead of walk into your home.
Some popular forms of physical humiliation are:
Although you often don’t even have to speak to humiliate someone, verbal humiliation is still quite popula
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