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When we ask a man to bring a semen sample for analysis or other studies there is usually no problem. He obtains it at home and brings it to us. However, when it is time to provide the sample for an In-Vitro Fertilisation, things change.
In general they are nervous, hypersensitive because of the responsibility it takes to do it right. They fear not being able to achieve an adequate arousal in unfamiliar surroundings, like a hospital environment and often with the wife in the operating room for egg retrieval. If to this, we add a male factor as the reason of the infertility, their feeling of guilt increases even more.
We, doctors, ask them if they think they will have problems that day. Most of them say no, others prefer to bring it from home, the hotel or previously frozen because they fear that difficulties may arise. They appreciate a lot the possibility to speak with the doctors and to see it is a common problem, because of course, in front of their wife they cannot complain or expose any fears since the answer usually is, “Well, honey, that’s all you have to do…”.
The male which have “no prolem” often leave the sample room with a “mission accomplished” face, but fearing that the quantity was too little or that the semen sample quality was worse than other times.
The semen quantity, (volume of ejaculate), its the quality and the level of orgasm depend on the degree of sexual arousal reached previously. That means that it is better when the intensity and time of excitement has been longer. This is due to the increase of vascularization of the seminal vesicles and prostate, which are the glands producing seminal fluid and thus favor a complete ejaculation.
When the excitement is less, as it often happens that day, ejaculation is usually incomplete and the man notices that. In some cases a blockage occurs, they are not able to provide a sample and it becomes a traumatic experience. In these situations we ask if they can not get an erection or if they are excited but cannot ejaculate. In the first case we give them a tablet to induce an erection. But mostly they don’t manage to ejaculate because, due to a psychological effect, this reflex is blocked. In this case we give an anxiolytic.
We ask all of them to relax while sitting or walking for an hour and we tell them not to worry if they cannot make it because we can extract the spermatozoa with a simple technique. Although they already imagine that this simple technique consists of puncturing a testicle, they are not scared, it actually takes away their stress. However, having to go for a B plan is totally exceptional.
The wives of the blocked men are surprised from the role suddenly acquired by their partners as she is actually the one coming out of the operating room!
The truth is that in the IVF cycles men are the forgotten ones and we intend to help them. From my experience, I think semen collection rooms must be redesigned not to make them look like they are inside a clinic and, on the other hand, we have to explain them how they can emotionally support their wife throughout the cycle and especially during the time waiting for the pregnancy test.
Therefore, I have spent months asking many men how they would like the room to be. Well, I have not received much information because each of them has very different tastes.
The results of my own research are as follows: men have in common the desire for intimacy, to feel isolated in order to concentrate on the sexual stimulation. They also greatly appreciate hygiene and a prior knowledge of the place, as this gives them security.
As I said, there is great variation depending on each individual in terms of what excites them, as well as which position facilitates ejaculation. This also happens in the position used during sexual intercourse, as some will prevent ejaculation. Thus, according to my statistics, most of them would like to masturbate sitting on a comfortable sofa, others prefer to lie down and some to remain standing.
To provide all possible sexual stimuli I started to think about the offer we should have in our collection rooms so they could have the chance to choose.
On the internet and in the sex-shops, the great number of sex toys for women and the few for heterosexual men called my attention. Finally the selection is as follows:
On this video, you can see how our new semen collection rooms look.
I have to say that the experience of using VR glasses for the donation made the whole process a lot easier, it was more like a game instead of a medical procedure. Very happy about that.
I think that the hardest part is to put everything in the recipient, to meet the target you would need to put the recipient upside down but then not much quantity would remain inside for long, so you end up doing strange malabarisms. Also touching the edges is not too comfortable either and trying not to touch while maintaining the recipient on target is a distracting task. IMO redesigning the recipient as a silicone vagina or condom would make the whole process a lot more successful.
Also when you are about to ejaculate it’s very funny trying to find the recipient with the VR glasses on.
Dear Mike,
I am glad that you felt it more like a game instead of a medical treatment. Thank you very much for your opinion.
We really appreciate your feed back and we will take into consideration your recomendations to improve our system.
Kind Regards,
Interesting how you tried to take the nurse pictures out of magazines. Here a couple could be going through a serious and sad struggle with their marriage (namely not knowing if they can ever have children) without encouraging porn and he’s told to look at other women besides his wife. How do you think she feels. I think your perspective was off at that moment.
But the religious factor. Though masturbation is a gray area as far as religious beliefs go, we both just simply try to steer clear of it. I laugh because I told him if he feels that being alone will be more effective, well, it’s for science right? But over all, we just try not to.
The religious problem I find is the porn, soft or not. It is against our vows, religion and total mindset to look at another in lust besides each other. We have been married 9 years and we are super open with each other. We’re one of those annoying couples that prove all the “Just give it a year” naysayers wrong and snog in a corner at social gatherings. He is amazing and our faithfulness to each other (and the sex ) is the most beautiful thing we will not give up. We even speak up if we chance a peek. I’m not fooling myself. Sorry for the rant.
So my question is, do they have the right to tell me he has to use a different means to ejaculate besides me. I’m pretty decent at a hand job especially if there were a specific kind of lubricant they needed me to get. And is at home always an option since it’s just for an SA for after a vasectomy? We live only a couple minutes from one of his clinic’s locations. I just want to be prepared if they tell us I “can’t” be there.
You tell me that you live a couple minutes from one of a clinic’s locations. I recommend you go to this clinic to be told what options you have, since there are several methods to obtain a sample, such as using a condom without spermicide or ejaculating in a specific sterile bottle.
good explanation about semen collection.. thanks for sharing
Thanks for an excellent article on the subject.
I went though the same process while I had to give it for a semen test.
I was under huge stress because I did not knew if I would get aroused and would be able to conduct the process.
Unfortunately, the testing lab where I had to give the sample told me to got to the toilet and get the sample.
and the toilet had a kind of odour and was kind of a confined space and not ventilated enough.
I tried and failed, the environment was not at all comfortable.
At times you just do not get into the right mood so quickly and stuck in a toilet to do so makes it even difficult. I tried to use pronographic content. But amazingly there were no good network connection.
I was in a bad spot here.
Eventually, I told the clinic guy that toilet is smelly and its not going to happen here. can I collect the sample at home and get it to you as my house if close by. He agreed if I can get it in 15 minutes.
I went home, turned on the AC and tried to set the mood. I bet I was in the stress. And I was stuck in the what if’s.
What if the quantity is not good and I am done with lower quantity. How can you enjoy something with a virtual gun at your head and clock ticking.
But finally it happened and I was so happy. Just wanted to get every drop inside.
All these collection centers should really make better comfortable rooms to facilitate. It’s true in IVF treatments its difficult for men too. And there is also a kind of guilt that you are jerking off to a pronographic girl to get you child with your wife.
Thank you for sharing your experience with us.
It is true that, in some clinics, the sample collection room is not well- equipped. At Institut Maquès we attach great importance to this matter since, as you say, IVF treatments are also difficult for men, and clinics should take this into consideration.
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65
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Z

She walked around the desk. I stood up.
She led me to a small room. It was like my doctor’s room.
“Please remove your clothes, Peter. Here is a gown for you. Our doctor will need to give you a short medical check, and measure your present weight without clothing. The doctor will be with you in a few minutes”.
She left the room. I undressed, and put on the gown. I sat on the bench, and waited.
The doctor came in. She was a powerful-looking woman with short blond hair. Another woman came in with her. She also looked strong.
“Good afternoon, Peter. Please step onto the scales. And you will need to slip off your gown too. We need your exact weight, without clothes”.
I was embarrassed by this, but did as she asked.
“Very good. You may put your gown back on. Please sit on the bench”.
She gave me a short medical examination. 
“That’s all good” she said at last. “Have you had a tetanus injection within the last five years?”
“Then I recommend that you have one, since you will be on a farm for your training. I can give you one now, if you wish”.
“Ok, thanks, let’s do that” I said.
She prepared a hypodermic needle. 
She looked at me, as if she was trying to say something.
“This also contains a sedative, Peter. Is that ok? You can still refuse if you wish. You still have 24 hours to change your mind, so you may want to wait before getting this shot. So if you don’t want the shot, just say, and I’ll tell them you declined.”
“I don’t understand. Why would I refuse? I want to do this” I said.
She gave me the injection. I immediately felt the effect. I felt sleepy.
“There. No turning back now! Not for you! Lie down on the bench and rest. You’ll be asleep in a few seconds now. We’ll take care of you from now on, Peter” she said.
I lay down. I suddenly felt enormously tired. “Good luck with your new life, Peter” I heard her say. She seemed to be a long way away.
I was not aware of falling asleep, or of sleeping at all, but I must have, because I suddenly woke up.
I was in a different room, which I did not recognize. Time must have passed. I was lying on a stretcher. A Lady I hadn’t seen before stood before me. I had some kind of jacket on. When I tried to sit up, I found I was held down. And my arms were held across my chest by the jacket. I realized it was a strait jacket, strapped tight. I realized I was naked under the canvas jacket.
“Relax, Peter.You have been asleep for 24 hours. We have put you in a lunatic restraint, a strait jacket, as a precaution.” said the Lady “You are perfectly safe, but you won’t be able to get out of that restraint, so don’t bother fighting against it. It’s just a standard precaution. We put you in it while we were transporting you here, while you were asleep, just in case you woke up early. I’ll take if off in a few minutes. Just relax”.
I stopped struggling against the straps, and lay still. She looked down at me, and smiled.
“I welcome you to your new life, Peter. 24 hours have elapsed, so your contract is now fully in effect. You can’t cancel it now. I am your Supervisor. You are now at our Farm. This is where you will serve out the terms of your contract. As you recall, you agreed to the training course that we have devised. Our course is designed to harden males physically, reduce their weight to a value proper for a healthy male, and to modify their male impulses as required for the service of women. For new entrants, this means we need to use methods which require some degree of compulsion. And that includes you, Peter! You probably didn’t realize it, but the contract you signed contained your agreement to be committed here for the term of the contract. We therefore have the legal right to use enforcement. And we intend to!”
She continued “I see you are a well-fed male. And have not been exercising much. All our inmates are overweight and unfit when they arrive. We remedy that gradually, and with care, so that our men become as lean and strong, as males are naturally intended to be. But our Society provides more improvement than purely physical. We modify male attitudes, and make males into good slaves of women. I emphasize the word “good”. Any male can be a bad slave. We train males to be good slaves!”
I still felt sleepy. I must surely be hallucinating from the drug. I could not believe what I was hearing. What on earth was she talking about? Male slaves? She obviously hasn’t heard about gender equality! Time for me to straighten this out…..
“Excuse me? Miss? Miss Supervisor? You are making a mistake, I’m not here for....” I started to explain….
“Be quiet!” she shouted. I was immediately silent. She was quite frightening when she spoke like that! She was very angry!
She took a breath. I did not dare move. I could not, anyway, in the strait jacket. She was clearly angry.
“Alright Peter. Please excuse my anger. I’m calm now! Please understand that I am not used to a male telling me that I’m making a mistake! And it’s been a long time since a male even spoke to me without permission! But of course you are new here, and do not know our rules. So I won’t punish you! But, please, just be quiet. I will give you a chance to speak later”
She went on. “This farm is owned by a private group of Ladies, who wish to hold men as slaves. We mean real slaves, not pretend slaves. We therefore seek out suitable men, men who are able to make the needed financial and time commitment, and we then train them to be slaves. REAL slaves. You have been selected, Peter. You are now an inmate, and you will now, in your turn, be trained to be a slave. Your weight loss will be attained, although it is just a small part of your training here.”
I opened my mouth to speak, but then shut it again when I saw her expression. She obviously had some big hang up with me speaking. I did not wish to chance my luck about that. I would wait until I was out of this strait jacket, and this mistake was sorted out. Something very strange was going on here, or maybe I was still dreaming.
She continued. “This is real, Peter, not a dream, not just another of your story-fantasies! We have read your stories, of course! They are amusing stories. But now, you are about to experience the reality! This time, it’s not a story! This time, you find out what it’s like, to be a slave, for real!”
“Now. Listen up.You need to learn the facts of life here. Women are in charge here. You, as a male, have no say. None at all. This is a private organization of dominant, sadistic women. Our primary purpose is to find suitable males (like you, Peter), make them into slaves, and keep them to suffer for our enjoyment. But, we are also practical…..this place needs a lot of work and upkeep, so we also use our male slaves for the labour we need. The arrangement works out very well! This is NOT one of your foolish fantasies, Peter! This is a real, working farm, with REAL slaves doing REAL work”
She laughed at my expression. “You no doubt thinking that you are not a slave. Is that right? All men think that! It’s no problem! We have developed methods which efficiently transform any man, even the most arrogant, self-willed ones (like you, Peter!) into good slaves. Our methods are very simple: we keep our slaves chained, and we enforce our strict rules with severe punishments. Our methods have worked on every man who has ever come here. Our methods have never yet failed to make a man into a slave!”
“Our standard punishment is a hard leather strap, applied to the slave’s buttocks until he is red and sore. Our approach might seem cruel, but we have tried other methods, and find ours is the most efficient. We have found that a heavy leather strap, used firmly and strictly, without regard to begging, produces total obedience in a very short time. The use of an individual chain for each prisoner prevents escape, eliminates the need for constant supervision, and allows our slaves to work at their individual work places without any possibility of escape. So we have a very practical system, as you will find out”.
“We have rules, some of which you should know right away: you may not speak without permission. You must obey orders from any free person without hesitation or comment. When you are in the presence of a free person, you must kneel and keep your eyes down. That is all you need to know for now. You can learn our other rules as you go along. Once you have heard a rule, be aware that you will be severely punished if you disobey!”
“You will also have weekly strappings, as a routine matter. All our slaves are strapped, every Sunday afternoon. Only 20 strokes, not too many. These weekly strappings provide a regular reminder of your status here, and a reminder of the penalty for not being a good slave. If you are a good slave, you will probably not get any more additional strokes. You will just get your usual 20 every week. But if you choose to be a bad slave, you will find that each of your errors will be not
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