Son Sucked Dad
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Son Sucked Dad
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I knew this day would come as I had been warned by those who had gone before me.He's going to ask someday. She's going to have questions. You need to get your story straight.
Jun 14, 2016, 04:53 PM EDT | Updated Jun 15, 2017
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I knew this day would come as I had been warned by those who had gone before me.
You need to get your story straight. You have to be *prepared* because you'll be caught with your pants down when the kids ask about the specifics of sex.
And, in a dark car, on the way home from dinner, it happened: my son and I had a whopper of a conversation.
While I've mostly recovered from the trauma, my friends are still reeling from the advice I gave him.
The evening started out innocently enough. After attending an event as a family, Hubby and I decided to take the kids out for dinner at one of our favorite watering holes (read: drink martinis as the kids consumed large quantities of fried foods and dessert). We spent that time talking to each other, visiting with friends who'd also gone to the restaurant and joking with our favorite bartender. It was a picture perfect moment: warm sweaters, noisy atmosphere, a family smiling together. I had no way of knowing that my son had questions brimming and he'd decided he was going to get some answers on the way home.
As we had taken two cars,my son opted to ride home with me. I should have seen this as a SIGN, people. Of what, I don't know, but I should have seen SOMETHING coming.
Once in the car, and about two seconds after I navigated the car away from the curb, he dropped a bomb on me: there was a sexting scandal at school and he was upset.
Let me repeat that: MY TWELVE YEAR OLD WAS UPSET ABOUT A SEXTING INCIDENT. Twelve. As in, they don't even have the word "teen" in their ages yet, bitchachos.
Pardon me as I try not to drive this people mover right into a tree.
While he was not involved (THANKYOUSWEETBABYJESUS), he was upset about the consequences, the children involved and the general implications that this kind of thing brings. He wondered what would happen if he received salacious texts, who he should tell, why kids would do such a thing. Heavy topics weighed on his mind and he wanted to talk about all of it. WITH ME. As I was driving heavy machinery. In the dark. Without Hubby as a back up.
I'm not going to lie: I was caught with my pants down and I swear, the deer we passed on the road did not look nearly as surprised as I did when I was driving.
But, I made a choice to keep driving, to take the longest way home possible because my tween was talking, openly talking to me about sex. I didn't know when, or if, this situation would ever present itself again. I don't know if it was the dark, country roads I slowly drove, the fact that we weren't facing each other or if the stars just magically aligned to make him open up, but it happened.
As we quieted from the sexting discussion, he coyly and shyly said, "I have one more question" and the tone of his voice made me realize I needed to brace myself.
"Well. You know. Some of the boys, they talk about this thing that involves blowing. And work. Blow work, is it? Something that is like a job and involves blowing. I don't know what that means. Can you explain that to me?".
I'M NOT GOING TO SURVIVE THE TEEN YEARS, YOU GUYS.
Here I was, in a car, being asked a specific question about a sex act from my twelve year old. In the split seconds that followed his question, I debated: do I tell him? Do I push it aside and tell him that's for grown ups? Do I pull over on the side of the road and call Hubby to take over? How hard will I have to junk punch Hubby when I get home? I honestly didn't know what to do and, as I gripped the steering wheel and tried to keep myself from driving into a cornfield, I made a decision.
I told him. I was honest and forthright. And, then it was HIM wearing the deer in the headlights expression.
As the reality of the answer set in, and, realizing these moments with tweens are fleeting, I took it one step further: I told him a committed relationship is a two way street and when you are intimate with someone, it's never one sided. If he's alone with a girl, it's to be enjoyable for both of them and it's never okay to let a girl please him solely.
I told him that if you get one, you give one. Plain and simple. Because no daughter in law of mine is going to stand in my kitchen and wonder why he's such a greedy asshole in the bedroom.
And, judging from the looks of horror on my friends' faces as I've recounted this story, I seem to be in the minority when it comes talking openly with kids about sex. I've been accused of condoning pre marital sex. I've been told I crossed a line by explaining the specifics of a sex act to my child. And, I've been told that I'm asking for trouble by telling him that his eventual girlfriend's needs are important, too. Mostly, my friends have cry laughed at the image of me driving down the street being asked about knob polishing. And, naturally, they all asked how soon I'd be blogging about my drive from hell....
But, for all the judgement, all the shocked outcry, I stand by what I told my son. I stand by my honesty and I hope, that in doing so, I've set the stage for him to want to come back to ask questions, to get good, solid answers from his father and I. And, in that moment, he trusted me with his thoughts and was open and honest with me. The least I could do was be honest right back.
Because if you get it, you give it, people.
Christine Burke is a blogger and freelance writer. Her personal blog is keeperofthefruitloops.com and she can be found on Facebook . Her latest book, "I Just Want To Be Perfect" is available on Amazon.
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Ben McCormack's short film about a gay encounter in a bathhouse
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Published: 01:18 BST, 7 April 2017 | Updated: 02:52 BST, 7 April 2017
A Current Affair reporter Ben McCormack directed a sick gay incest film that shows a father performing a sex act on his adult son, Daily Mail Australia can reveal.
McCormack, who was yesterday charged with sending child pornography, wrote and directed a five-minute film about a young man's trip to a gay bath house in Brisbane.
The protagonist, who wears nothing more than a towel for most of the short film, is seen being pleasured by an anonymous man, who is later revealed to be his father.
One of McCormack's colleagues at ACA said people at the network were disgusted by the film - and revealed that he had planned to settle down and have children before his shocking arrest.
Reporter Ben McCormack directed a sick gay incest film that shows a father performing a sex act on his son. Pictured, the son in the film
A Current Affair journalist McCormack wrote and directed a five-minute film about a young man's trip to a gay bath house in Brisbane. Pictured, a man in the bath house
The protagonist is seen being pleasured by an anonymous man, who is later revealed to be his father (pictured)
The young man is pleasured by a man through a hole in a wall, but when he exits, he realises the man is his father
McCormack's movie, called 'Family Outing', shows a young man nervously walking through a sex club wearing only a towel as other men leer at him.
He then walks into a cubicle and is pleasured by a man through a hole in a wall. When the two men exit, they look at each other and realise each other's identity.
'Dad?' the son says, as the film ends.
The black-and-white film, filmed in 2001, was shot at an inner-city gay bath house in Brisbane.
A colleague of McCormack's at ACA has also revealed that the reporter had been looking forward to settling down and having children.
'Ben has been openly gay the entire time he was at Nine,' they said.
'He was a single guy and a few years ago he was talking about having a kid.
'McCormack would often talk about his filmmaking prowess and in particular about 'Family Outing',' they said.
'He would talk about it all the time. The storyline was a bit sick and made people around the ACA office say "why the f*** would you do that?"
McCormack's movie, called 'Family Outing', shows a young man nervously walking through a sex club wearing only a towel as other men leer at him
Men are seen touching each other inside the Brisbane bath house during the short film
The black-and-white film was shot at an inner-city gay bath house in Brisbane. Pictured, a wall of a cubicle, which has a hole in it
Ben McCormack was sensationally charged with using a carriage service for child pornography material on Thursday
One of the film's crew told Daily Mail Australia that the film was 'highly successful' and was shown at film festivals around the world.
'It was confronting but it wasn't strange because I knew that Ben was gay,' the source said.
The source, who said they have not spoken to McCormack for 15 years, said none of the actors or crew were paid for working on the film.
Speaking of the accusations made against the Channel Nine veteran reporter, they added: 'The whole thing has shocked me. No one had a clue.'
One of McCormack's colleagues said staff were left shocked when he was charged on Thursday.
'His arrest came as a real shock because we thought there were no surprises about Ben - he was open about being gay even though Nine is not exactly the most gay-friendly place to work. Even the chicks there are really blokey," the source said.
The colleague said he was assigned to chase down paedophile Robert Hughes in Singapore after Peter Stefanovic landed an interview with one of his victims, Sarah Monahan, who was a child at the time she appeared alongside Hughes in the 1980s sitcom Hey Dad!.
One of McCormack's colleagues said staff were left shocked when he was charged
The journalist was instrumental in Nine's coverage of the Hey Dad! abuse saga
McCormack (left) was suspended by the network after he allegedly had 'sexually explicit conversations' about children and discussed child pornography with another man
Colleagues remembered him as a reporter who would 'get the job done and didn't have a massive private life'.
'He didn't have anyone to go home to and he would hang around work until late,' they said.
Sources said McCormack, 42, was 'very close' to ACA's head cameraman Drew Benjamin, who has been at the network for 30-odd years, and drove McCormack away from Redfern police station on Thursday night.
McCormack was sensationally charged with sending child pornography using a carriage service on Thursday.
He was suspended by the network after he allegedly had 'sexually explicit conversations' about children and discussed child pornography with another man.
His strict bail conditions mean he is unable to go on the internet other than for work, including social media websites,.
He is also not allowed to meet anyone under the age of 16, other than family members - and even then an adult must be in the room at the time.
McCormack is also banned from communicating with anyone under the age of 16 and cannot go near playgrounds, schools or anywhere 'known to be frequented by children'.
He is due to appear in court on May 1.
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Nothing. They’re boys. That’s what boys do. As long as they weren’t jacking each other off, let it be.
@TruthBTold :
I just meant in the fact that there's a weird tension between us. I'm ok with it, I mean as a single dad I do it all the time I just want them to know I'm ok with it
@Luis54 :
Make a joke about it and move on.
I have a 16yr old. My wife recently ran across some "used" towels and lotion under his bed when changing his sheets. I had to have a talk with him about being more discreet with the towels - mix'em in the laundry boy! I told him he just took some years off his mom's life... then moved on, nothing to see here!
Also had the talk with the wife about how he is old enough to take care of changing his sheets
@SDNRR :
I guess I do have to talk to them. I mean were pretty comfortable being nude around each other and I knew they masterbated. I just need to tell them to maybe put a socker on the door. Haha . I guess I just have to get used to it. We're all guys and my son's will be guys.maybe letting them know I do it too will make the awkwardness go away.
@SDNRR :
That's funny, SNDRR!
I do agree tho that you should just crack some Wise and move on. Especially now that they're as old as 17?? If I was barely 11 yrs old when I got in my 1st (of a buh-zillion) 'sticky situation', then this is certainly not their first shot at cumming of age. It definitely is not their first mutual wank-fest. They are obviously perfectly comfortable with their own bodies (and each other's) to get totally naked, bypassing the distraction of the initial akwardness
. They get charged up watching each other - watch each other jack off. And they're performing in person! Way better than video. No worries - whether it's 2 brother's, or 2 buddies, it's fine and they won't "catch gay" from mutual actions, the worst that can happen? They might end up being in very solid relationships due to the fact that they grew up more open-minded than most men. What they're doing at this age is fine. But yeah...Pop needs to give them a "heads up". NO woman needs to be changing Gooey sheets or reaching blindly into a sticky clothes hamper! Especially if they got no enjoyment in getting things gooed up'! Just sayin' .
Pretend you didn't see anything and keep on marching. Males jack off. Young males jack off very often. Learn to knock.
@LadyKat :
They saw me. I walked in on them. I mean I jack off all the time as a single dad. There's just that awkward tension of getting caught
@LadyKat :
True about the young men. That ship has sailed on up'to 54 yrs old. I still masturbate all the time - more so since I was dealt the blow of the ''Widower" Status. It's very healthy to keep a routine schedule of " preventative Maintenance" so the equipment stays in good working order and appearance too!
I taught my son to do his own laundry about 14 so I wouldn't have to deal with that part.
@fallen_angel :
Yes! Teach them soon! My husband is 23 and his mom is stilling willing to do his laundry and he lets her do it. Not good and im having a hard time "training" him to do his housechores but i have to!
Is it normal for siblings to masterbate in front of each other? THAT is what I would feel uncomfortable about.
I'm a single mom, every now and then I accidentally catch my 16 y/o son with his hand down his pants - he can't seem to do anything without touching himself. LOL. I just ignore or say, "Dude, keep it private, o.k.?" and then move on to other topics.
Leave lube, tissues, hygienic wipes and a bin in their room. It would be a good time to talk to them about sexual relationships, responsibility, protection etc. Let them know that masturbation is the saf
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