Social Connectivity, Loneliness, and Social Media
How could it be that social networking can in fact make us to feel DIS-connected?
Well, to begin with we have to come back to what connects us in the initial place. The fact is, connection with people (simply being around people) - we call it connectivity - isn't enough. We have so much connection with people today, but almost no connection.
But specifically, with social networking use, and the more we put it to use the worse it gets, there are real blockers to real connection 먹튀사이트. Because social networking tends to be the highlights reel of our lives, we usually do not have connection, but comparison.
Connection breeds intimacy and trust, but comparison breeds envy and essentially an application of loneliness and disconnectedness develops.
In short, connection on social networking tends to produce an unreal form of connection. Generally, it's a fake form of connection. It will imitate intimacy without attaining it.
Whenever you return many years - before social networking, people who were more introverted - might struggle with being in social settings, and therefore would struggle to feel connected. Surely though social networking is a good platform for introverted people to actually connect - isn't it?
To a certain extent, and for some to a great extent, that may be true. But there's still something missing. Unless people are willing to share of themselves, and let themselves be vulnerable, trusting another person, there won't be connection. By that, I don't mean the sordid details. But the true reality of what they're thinking and feeling.
In some ways introverts have always had an advantage this way over extroverts. Introverts appreciate one-to-one relationships more and tend to develop deeper relationships with fewer people as a result.
That has been the case before social networking and it's still the case. Potentially it's introverts who lose out most as a result of social networking, if they replace their need of deeper one-to-one connection with connectivity.
Let's paint a situation that people have probably all seen. You go out to dinner - and at the table next for you is a family group of 4 - and they're ALL on their phones. They're not engaging with each other. Why is it that even whenever we have the opportunity to get in touch face to handle, sometimes we choose to stay disconnected? What is so attractive about connecting through social networking rather than connecting face to handle?
We need to be honest here, don't we? We've all been there, or at the very least been tempted! I guess it's the case that with social networking we control the connection; we don't have to attend for or count on others.
We do need certainly to resist that temptation. Connection originates from presence. We cannot be distracted and be or remain present. And if we aren't present there's no connection, meaning no blessing within the relationship for anyone partaking inside it, hence the social loneliness (feeling of being lonely in a crowded room) we face as a result.
Yet we also have to be realistic in this busy instant communication age. If my partner or among my daughters sends me a text and it's urgent I'll answer and I'll never apologise for that - because that is where the tool becomes connection.
What is research showing are a few of the dangers of too much interaction online? What effect will this have on us all, say 10, 20 years down the track?
In some ways it's hard to know, but I suspect we'll gradually lose the ability to truly communicate, to be real, to be vulnerable, to trust other people. And I suspect there'll become more problems with mental ill-health.
Social networking connection (connectivity) tends to replace real face-to-face connection. Social networking connection increases feelings of envy - because we're making so many comparisons. But we're not comparing with reality.
People that have mental health issues like depression and anxiety suffer more acutely because excessive social networking use causes us to withdraw and it increases isolation.
Social networking misuse does present us with some alarming potential realities.
So are you experiencing some simple tips to help counteract our online connectivity?
We have to be intentional. Deliberate and intentional. We have to become aware when our social networking is no further our friend but our nemesis. It must serve us, not one other way around. One good exemplory instance of that is to check on the Apps on our phones. Are we hooked on certain Apps? In that case, and I've done this with many of them, we could delete them. Learn to handle without them. We did before.
If there's a very important factor we are able to do it's not look at it first thing each day, while we're still in bed, and not engage with it last thing, when we're hopping into bed. Let's be present with your family members and focus on getting ready for your day ahead, or on being in an excellent frame of mind for rest.
And think about some suggestions to help us balance our online and face to handle connectivity?
You can find two key words here that apply to restoring balance in just about any section of our lives: AWARENESS and ACTION.
We need to become aware HOW our social networking impacts us negatively, as well as identifying WHAT we're lacking as a result. Once we're aware, then we are able to plan what we will change. Action often will come in the proper execution of setting some standards which can be not too difficult to implement, like I'll check my social networking only 2 to 3 times each day, not twenty (or more).
But I'll also ensure there's some real face-to-face interaction with people, and real sharing and listening, every single day. Make it into something of a regular reminder. Add some reflection time to your entire day, that ought to be easy given you're checking social networking less... I guarantee you'll be happier as a result.
It's also useful to become aware of how edifying our social networking it... it's like television... there are several great programs which can be instructive and educational... there's so much on social networking that is poor of quality and substance. We have to master to be discerning.