Slutty Lifeguard
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Slutty Lifeguard
lots of hypocrisy in that demographic
If a fertilized egg is a legal person, shouldn't you be allowed to claim it as a dependent on your taxes?
My husband told someone he was out with his little sister. He doesn’t have one.
AITA for insisting my SIL not call herself "mom" when talking to her bio daughter?
AITA for getting mad at my mom for trying to force me to let my brother use my laptop?
AITA for telling my dad that we all know how great my cousin is and to shut up about her for 5 minutes
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correct. Also it treats a fetus as property since the punishment for someone purposely causing your wife to have a misarrange (IE, a forced abortion) is just a fine. Its clear that God does not give a fetus the same status as a breathing human.
Of course a fetus isnt the only thing treated less than in the bible. Women and slaves were also second class citizens in the bible, but that part gets glossed over a lot more often for some reason.
Got it. So if I'm ever pregnant, I'll just have to walk around dramatically wailing "oh, no! A fetus in my uterus! How awful it would be if someone were to abort it! Completely against my will! The horror! The tragedy! (I'll only shut up if you point me in the direction of the nearest underground abortion clinic.) The humanity!"
The only moral abortion is my abortion.
I just... I know we're all frustrated that logic isn't working but LOGIC ISN'T WORKING . We need to not rely solely on rhetoric and logical debate to move things forward here. We absolutely need to keep having these conversations with people to make progress there but that sort of progress is too slow (or non-existent for some).
"The only moral abortion is my abortion."
Then surprised Pikachu face when they realize abortion is banned for them, too.
"We didn't mean it like that! [Insert valid reason for wanting an abortion (which is any reason) that is major for them, but anyone else with the same exact reason needs to pull themselves up by the bootstraps]"
Doctors Note? Who the hell can see a doctor making $16 a hour???
Definitely. I think Trish probably thought a lot about how to approach this topic in a benign way and might have had support from her own friend group as well. She did the right thing!
Next, she's going to go around like, "did you hear that OP's husband is leaving her? And for his own sister, too!"
Adoptive parent here: if the adoption has gone through, you have control over the frequency and nature of the contact between your daughter and her family of origin. It's not uncommon for birth parents to struggle with TPR and adoption, so I can't call your SIL TA for still referring to herself as mom, etc. What you can do in this situation is limit contact and focus on your daughter. You and your wife can set new boundaries and give your daughter and SIL space and time to adjust and heal.
Adoption caseworker here: I love the empathy and understanding on behalf of the birth parent while also advocating for the best interests of the family.
But, depending on if they went through the courts to establish a post adoption contract agreement (PACA), parents might not have complete say if they can cut contact with bio mom. If it's an informal out-of-court agreement between the families, then yes, definitely. If it's a contract through the courts, then they should look over the agreement and see if there are any stipulations that void the contract null (not showing up to visits/calls three times is a popular one, for instance).
If there is a PACA and it only says that birth mother can send a letter every other month, then parents can scale back to that minimum requirement, and they don't have to allow anything else unless and until they decide otherwise.
OP didn't mention if there's this type of agreement in place or not, but I just wanted to throw this out there!
There is one, it is very favorable to us, and we can cut back, but my wife has to communicate that to her sister. We used to only hear from her when she needed money, now she calls every week. My daughter used to hear from her bio mom once every few months at best. My sister in law is taking advantage of my wife, and my wife’s spine has gone a bit noodlely when it comes to her sister. And I am very frustrated with it. I try to stay out and only coach my daughter to express her feelings and wants and to set boundaries, but feel my wife then isn’t being a good example.
Adoption is hard, sometimes harder when family roles get muddled along the way., like a bio mom becoming an aunt.
I think you need to speak to your wife about how this isn't about the adults and whose feelings might get bruised, but what is best for your daughter. Come from a place of empathy that you understand why putting boundaries in place might be so difficult for her, and that you'll have her back while both of you present a united front, but there does need to be changes. Come at it like teamwork, and the only members of your actual team are you, your wife, and your daughter.
Bio mom needs boundaries, and until she acts within those, she needs consequences. That will be a great lesson for your daughter to see in action: You can enforce boundaries with anyone, and give appropriate consequences when they are ignored, even when it's with the woman who birthed you. You don't have to accept mistreatment (even if it's just social), even when it's family you're dealing with.
NTA. Your mom is an A H. So's your brother.
Spam his phone with Xbox requests. Then go to his room and demand the Xbox. He'll refuse. Now go to your mom. Tell her you want to use his Xbox. Tell her she's raising a selfish brat. Stay strong and endure the shit storm. Keep repeating that she's raising a selfish brat.
Now go get your laptop. I don't care if the three hours are up or not. Take that laptop everywhere with you. Never share it with him again.
Buy a sturdy lock box to store your valuables (and laptop) to keep it from the thieves, I mean your messed up family members.
Or, when he inevitably doesn't give it back and OP takes it from under a pile of trash in his room again, hide it, and keep asking for it back like you didn't already take it back.
You'll have your laptop safe and sound, brother will think he's the one who lost it, so he won't dare come asking for it again because he won't know you have it, and mom is then out of your hair as well.
The fact that, after reading such an emphatic comment that was also voted in your favor, all you focused on was how much allowance she got, a credit card AND a car tells me YTA and a pretty rotten person. You have no appreciation for what you have and no empathy for someone that has lost so much at such a young age.
Also, a CC isn't free money. You have to PAY for it. A car isn't just a fancy item that takes you from point A to B. You have to PAY so much for a car.
Idk why I'm explaining this. You won't see it. Toodle.
15-year-olds aren't notorious for their ability to see outside of themselves. He's just a teenager venting on the internet, young things that he knows he shouldn't say aloud, and processing his feelings.
If he is anything like I was, this is just a knee-jerk response, but the actual comment (that I agree was very empathetic and amazing) will be thought of multiple times in the next few weeks as he slowly comes to terms with the truth in the words.
It takes a lot of experience and practice (neither of which OP has) to become self-aware and be able to see things from another perspective. That doesn't mean that OP won't try or get there eventually; it just takes more time and thinking through.
Ava has obviously experienced loss, and her coping strategies seem to make her more productive. What might not be obvious is that OP has suffered a loss, too. To go from an only child to a middle child with four other kids to spread attention around is a major change that takes a lot of adjustment. I imagine OP doesn't feel great having these thoughts, but he does have them nonetheless, and they need to be acknowledged and processed, not ignored and buried.
Giving a lot of credit here man. Let's face it, empathy happens before you're 15.
Sure, in a lot of situations. But not everyone is completely empathetic all the time, even as adults.
Teenagers are also widely recognized as being ego-centric. That doesn't mean that every teenager grows up to be without empathy.
Omg another one. I was here first. Step off my marbles, bitch.
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