Slut Cry

Slut Cry
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The Four Levels of Slut Sleeping around carries an unfair double standard, but sluttiness does have levels.
by Nathan DeGraaf | June 21, 2006
Points in Case is a daily literary humor publication featuring enlightening and irreverent comedy from seasoned writers and fresh voices, since 1999.
Main: Man, she’s a whore?
Nathan: How can you say that? She never got paid.
Main: I stand corrected. She’s a slut.
I think it’s unfair that women are often considered sluts for sleeping around. Women say that this perception of them propagates a double standard because men are never considered sluts for rampant sexual activity. (Although, if that were truly the case, then why do so many women I know call me a slut?) And recently, because I just dumped a girl who cheated on me, I have been pondering exactly what it is that makes a girl a slut .
Now, when I get to pondering, well, sometimes I just have to get out a pen and write down my thoughts. This was one of those times. You see, there are many different kinds of sluts, and there is not one hard and fast rule that simply defines a woman as a slut. But there are (at least) four levels of slut.
“Sadly, the Cheating Slut is really what most men mean when they say ‘slut' or ‘whore.' The first two levels are just people being people.”
This woman is not technically, by definition, a slut. She is the woman who gets stereotyped as a slut simply because she likes to fuck around. This woman typically has no boyfriend (or a boyfriend who doesn’t care that she fucks other men) and simply goes out looking to get laid. She doesn’t feel that she should have to settle down, and she thinks it’s unfair that other women degrade her for this. She is right. She is also one of the reasons I get up in the morning.
Of the last four women I’ve slept with, three fall into this category because (as far as I know), they were not cheating on anyone, were not lying about who they fucked, and were not asking for anything more than sex. Women love sex, too; they should not be blamed for seeking it. Stereotypes hurt everyone. Ironically enough, usually other women hate this girl because she can fuck who she wants, while men bare her no ill will. She is, after all, simply doing what she likes. And men, for the most part, respect that.
Unlike the whores that make up the second level of slut.
Much like the Sexually Liberated Woman, this slut has no boyfriend. She does however, and for whatever reason, feel she needs to lead men on. She fucks several different men at one time while tricking the men she fucks into thinking that they are pursuing a relationship. Which is to say that every one of the suckers she fucks happens to think that they’re the slut’s soon-to-be boyfriend. She also loves seeing men fight over her, which may be (at least in part) the motivation for her leading these poor bastards on.
The main thing that separates her from the Level 1 Slut is that she is not honest with the men in her life because she derives pleasure from wrapping suckers around her little finger. The women representing this level of slut usually leave me alone. I’m not sure why, but I’m pretty sure the Garden Variety Slut has a radar for suckers, and because I am not one, I hardly have to deal with these bitches.
I can’t say the same for the sluts in levels 3 and 4.
Cheating Sluts come in three different categories. There are those who simply cheat on a boyfriend they’ve had for a few months and then tell him (no big deal); those who cheat on a guy they’ve dated for a few months, never tell him, and force him to find out from his friends (a slightly bigger deal because these sluts lack honesty); and then there are the worst kind—the sluts who fuck around on a man they’ve been with for years and never tell him about it.
The first girl I fucked after the breakup belonged in last category. The bitch was engaged. She fucked me late in the afternoon and left early in the evening because her man would soon be arriving from work. To her fiancée, I say, “I hope your parents are proud of you for preparing to marry a 21-year-old waitress with no education. Oh, and by the way, I’ve never met a girl who had a tell for her female ejaculation before. I mean, her leg quivers like an epileptic in mid seizure and then she squirts. That’s kind of weird. And yes, I like her body, too.”
Sadly, the Cheating Slut is really what most men mean when they say “slut” or “whore.” The first two levels are just people being people, not people being disloyal bitches. What separates this level of slut from the fourth and final level of slut, is, quite simply, the motivation for cheating.
Fortunately for me, I live in a college community where finding a man with his own car, no roommates and a steady income is like hitting the jackpot for most girls. Unfortunately for me, this means I often get hit on by the Money Grubbing Slut.
The saddest thing about the Money Grubbing Slut is that she really does like (or even love) her boyfriend. She simply expects more from her man in terms of monetary consideration. She doesn’t make her own money and can’t live off her boyfriend’s petty McDonald’s wages, so she seeks out men who will take her to nice places and buy her shiny objects. This is the worst kind of whore because she’s pissing on love and respect all in the name of a few dollars.
I love promising this girl I will take her some place nice, then fucking her and ordering a pizza, explaining to her that I’m broke. After this, I can usually count the seconds until she leaves, feeling used. Then I double check my wallet; you can’t trust a Money Grubbing Slut (at least, not until she starts making her own money, in which case, the nickname gets changed to “Materialistic Shark,” which is unfair—I mean, why blame a girl for wanting money and making it?).
So guys, the next time you take a woman home from a bar, or fuck her in the bathroom at a party, or on the rooftop of a shopping mall, or in the grass median on the side of a highway (you know, whatever works for you), you may want to consider exactly what level of slut you are fucking. Remember, it’s not wrong if it’s just sex for sex’s sake (hell, female sexual liberation was the best thing to come out of the women’s rights movement). But if she’s in a relationship with some other guy (or guys) when you first fuck her, odds are she’s not the kind of girl you want to spend six bucks on.
Then again, few women are worth six bucks.
Nathan DeGraaf graduated fucking years ago with a BA in Creative Writing from the University of South Florida, which he still lives near because college chicks are the best. On... See full profile »
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Here’s the bottom line. No hidden meaning, no other way to put it. This is straightforward and straight to the damn point. If you have sex with a lot of people, you’re nasty. No ifs, ands, or buts about it. You’re nasty and that’s just how I feel. I don’t care if you don’t like me because of it.
I don’t care if it’s 2015 because it’s a fucking year, and that doesn’t determine who you sleep with. I don’t give a flying cockroach’s dick bone if you say I’m slut shaming because I think it’s shameful to be a slut. I don’t care if you’re a man or a woman because you’re still a slut if you sleep with multiple people.
When you have multiple partners, all I see are the STDs you may have or may get in the future. Nasty, disgusting, absolute yuck-factor. When you have multiple partners, I see your lack of worth because anyone can get what you’re offering. How cheap. I mean, I can get what you’re giving and so can that person over there and that one over there? Why should I want that? You’re overused goods. When you have multiple partners, I see you care more about instant gratification than actually making sure you don’t turn up making a baby with some stranger. Again, nasty. That poor STD baby.
You want equal rights for men and women? Here you go. You all get equal shame. You get equal amounts of disgust from me and other people. You get equally bad images of your private parts turning odd colors and rotting off because your genitals constantly touch someone else’s.
Oh you loved them at the time? So? You obviously make bad decisions about who you’re with if you loved all twenty of those men/women you slept with within the last few years. Oh you felt a connection? Great, do you feel it now that it’s over? Knowing what you know about them now, would you still have slept with all of them based on that connection? Were they just really hot? That’s great. How are those genital warts feeling because you sleep with anything that’s attractive?
Don’t sit in your little corner and cry that people are judging you and slut shaming you. You are a slut, so why aren’t you ashamed? Your sex life is public enough for people to judge you, so why are you crying about what you clearly either aren’t hiding or you can’t hide? Want to know whom I’ve slept in the past? You won’t find out because I don’t feel the need to broadcast my sex life then cry if someone knows how many people I’ve been with.
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The hottest, most beautiful wife in the world on our honeymoon July 2009.
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If some of the photos of my hot wife Rhonda in this bikini are blurry, it's because my hands were shaking! With her body, a diamond belly ring and a very sexy anklet, who could blame me?
My beautiful wife drew quite a bit of attention while I photographed her wearing an exotic bikini while she strolled around the pool at the Loews Hotel on South Beach after a quick evening swim. She wanted to go for an evening swim. I just wanted - needed - to watch her in that unbelievable sexy bikini. We both got our way that night. She garnered a great deal of attention at the pool at the Loews Hotel & Resort on South Beach. My wife is gorgeous and one of a kind, and I couldn't possibly be more proud of my beautiful wife.
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