Sleeping Drinking Wife

Sleeping Drinking Wife
I CAUGHT my friend having sex with my wife after a drunken night out together.
I’m 36 and my wife’s 34. We’ve been married for nine years and have a daughter aged seven.
We went out with friends one night and a few of them came back for a nightcap.
My wife had been drinking quite heavily. She started nodding off so I sent her to bed. Our friends drifted off home, apart from one, an old friend of mine from school. He went to the bathroom while I started to tidy up. I suddenly heard a banging noise coming from my bedroom.
I opened the door to our room and saw my friend having sex, lying on top of my wife’s naked, unconscious body.
My wife’s arms were around him. I shouted at him to get off. My wife opened her eyes and they rolled back in her head.
I shouted again and my wife said to my friend, “You’d better stop.” He slowly got up and started to get dressed. He then walked out of the bedroom apologising. He said he didn’t know what had happened.
My wife couldn’t remember much the next day. She is embarrassed and ashamed but doesn’t want to go to the police.
She insists that nothing is going on between them. Meanwhile, I’m full of anger and rage.
DEIDRE SAYS: You’re shocked, furious and feel betrayed, and you can’t just brush this under the carpet. From the sound of it they were both very drunk.
If your wife was too drunk to give meaningful consent, it was rape clear and simple, but it is very common for raped women to feel somehow responsible, especially if they have been drinking.
If she finds it too hard to talk about this openly with you, urge her to talk to Rape Crisis ( rapecrisis.org.uk , 0808 802 9999). I doubt your friendship is going to survive this but for your daughter’s sake it is important that your marriage does.
Get Relate’s help to work through all the feelings that have been stirred up. (see relate.org.uk , 0300 100 1234).
MY dad nearly drove us both off the road in a panic when I told him I knew he’d been cheating on Mum.
My sister found some texts on his phone five years ago and it was obvious he’d been seeing somebody else.
She was 20 at the time and I was 23 and we decided not to say anything to avoid upsetting Mum.
We then had a string of silent calls to the house. Mum answered the phone one day and this woman told her everything.
My sister said she’d been sleeping with my dad for a year and that he had given her spare keys to our holiday flat.
My mum told my sister and she confessed she’d known about it for ages.
Mum said they were too old for her to do anything and she wasn’t going to leave him – they’re both 64.
Dad now has cancer and the prognosis isn’t looking good.
I’ve always been a fairly dutiful daughter but we were arguing about something unrelated in the car on the way to the hospital and I bit back at him about the affair.
Some things had gone missing from our holiday home – I knew it was this other
woman – but Dad ducked and dived and had an answer for everything.
I feel so angry that he may pass away and not admit to Mum he’s treated her badly.
DEIDRE SAYS: By all means tell your dad you think he should say sorry to your mother while he still can but if they both find denial more comfortable, you need to let it go.
Nobody can truly know what goes on in someone else’s relationship and if your mother is trying to protect herself from more hurt, that is up to her.
Your father knows the truth and it is on his conscience.
It could help to talk your feelings through with Family Lives ( familylives.org.uk , 0808 800 2222).
I ONLY found out that my partner was married when his teenage daughter turned up at our house.
I’m 45 and my partner is 48. We’ve been together for 12 years and have a five-year-old son together.
One day I was confronted by a girl demanding to see her dad. My partner came to the door and this girl went mental at him.
My partner then told me the truth – that he was married.
His daughter is 14. I felt betrayed. I keep imagining him and his wife having sex while I was on my own.
That was three months ago. I haven’t slept in his bed since.
DEIDRE SAYS: Being deceived for so long is devastating but it’s going to serve no one, least of all your son, to let your relationship freeze.
Ask him why he kept this secret. It’s no excuse but maybe he was frightened to lose you.
If you can be grown-up about this, the children might even enjoy having a half-sibling.
I TOOK an overdose when my boyfriend dumped me but he was then very sympathetic and we still have sex.
He’s got another girlfriend though.
I’m 24 and my boyfriend is 25. We were together for a few months two years ago.
We split due to my mood swings and constant paranoia.
I took the split badly and made an attempt on my life. My boyfriend was so supportive and confided in my friend that he was still in love with me.
He got back in touch with me a few months ago and we’ve had sex a few times since.
I know he still cares, but he’s going out with another girl at the moment.
Could he be scared to commit to me because of what I did?
DEIDRE SAYS: Your suicide attempt must have been very scary for your boyfriend.
I hope you are now getting the help you need. Often the underlying problem is your own lack of self-esteem.
And I worry this is leading you to have sex with him even though he has another girlfriend now.
Tell him he has to make a choice and don’t have sex with him again unless he
commits to you.
I’m sending you my e-leaflet on Raising Self-Esteem.
MY husband hasn’t so much as touched me since I gave birth to our baby boy six months ago.
I am 24 and my husband is two years older.
We have been married for three years and our relationship has always been good – until now.
I have done everything I can possibly think of to initiate sex with him but nothing works.
It is really starting to affect my confidence and I am sure our lack of
closeness will be having a bad effect on our baby.
I am especially worried because he has started coming home late – and always seems keen to get out of the house at every opportunity.
DEIDRE SAYS: Sexual guilt leads some men to find it difficult to link sex with the mother of their child.
Some can’t get the image of childbirth out of their heads or feel guilty about having put you through a painful experience.
But of course you need to talk with him about what’s going on.
Maybe he is also feeling pushed out and rejected.
Then try the tactics in my advice line Sex Play Therapy. Ring 09067 577 162.
MY ex has told our children she’s pregnant and I’m worried she will start to neglect them once the baby arrives.
We divorced three years ago. Our children are seven and five and they live with me and my lovely partner most of the time.
My ex has the kids a couple of nights a week but often says she can’t cope.
She’s had many boyfriends since the divorce, and our kids don’t even know the surname of the dad-to-be. Should I insist we meet up to discuss this?
DEIDRE SAYS: Meeting up sounds sensible. But offer extra support rather than accuse her. Is the unborn baby’s dad still about? If so, invite him too.
Family Lives can help you negotiate this tricky situation ( familylives.org.uk , 0800 800 2222).
I WAS totally shocked to discover my widowed dad has been viewing gay websites.
I’m 43 and my dad has been widowed for the past two years after a long and happy marriage.
He bought a laptop recently and I often check my emails during visits. Pop-ups for a gay website appeared last week.
I checked the browsing history and my dad had been viewing gay websites.
Should I raise it with him or ignore it?
DEIDRE SAYS: Assuming the participants were of age and the material is legal, then it’s none of your business.
Many straight men look at gay porn, so don’t jump to conclusions, and I think it will embarrass you both if you ask him about it.
Tell me what you think on my Facebook page today .
You can follow my life and sex tips on Twitter @deardeidre

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By missmayhem33 , 7 years ago on Getting Back
My boyfriend was drunk and let his friend sleep between us.

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My boyfriend and I were drinking with a friend of his who is going through hard times emotionally. My boyfriends an extremely nice and kind person, so he asked if his friend wanted to sleep with us( it was a weird thing to even ask) so he did. My boyfriend was thinking his friend would sleep on one side of him but instead he slept in the middle of us....and his friend ended up spooning me. He touched my butt, and was cms away from touching my ***** and my pants area. It was strange so as soon as his friend passed out I left to sleep on the coach. In morning my boyfriend woke me up saying he was sorry and that he also thought it was weird. I thought the whole incident was weird but what got me more worried was as it was happening he didn't say anything except telling his friend " she's my girlfriend" and " don't try to **** her". My question basically is aren't guys usually really protective? And don't want other guys to even touch their girls no matter who it is or where they touch? I just can't get this incident out of my head. I felt so violated.
Sounds very strange! What did he think his friend was just going to lay there and not do any thing to you laying next to him in bed!!!!! Your lucky he didn't try to pleasure you and it sounds like he tried but you didn't give him a sign that you wanted him too but then when a guy is drunk he might do any thing he normally wouldn't do when sober! Talk to your boyfriend and tell him how you felt going through all that! If your boyfriend did it once he will do it again when drunk! NOW IS THE TIME TO SPEAK UP !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Your lucky he didn't rape you! BE FIRM WHEN YOU TALK TO HIM!!
Why did you go along with it as long as you did? I'm glad you eventually went to sleep somewhere else.
Your boyfriend said it was weird, but it was his idea, wasn't it? I would be offended too. I don't care how nice and kind your boyfriend is; he never should have suggested something so disrespectful of you. If I were in your shoes I would wonder how much he valued me too.
To give a completely honest opinion here, I don't know your boyfriend obviously, but it sounds to me like you were set up.
I think your boyfriend and his buddy were drinking and hatched this stupid plan for a ***** and hoped you would go along with it while making it seem spontaneous.
Sorry, but it's such a weird situation that it seems like a complete set up to me.
Drunks do stupid things. Maybe this was some kind of sick set up & he was "testing" your loyalty. Maybe it was just innocent / stupid. You did the right thing by moving to the couch. Perhaps you should have moved earlier.
If you are not comfortable with this, just make sure it never happens again.
Seems to me like your bf tried for a 3some. Be open minded about it and ask your bf if those were his intentions. Honestly though, did it excite you even just a little as he was touching you? Be honest.
Hi Chrislos good question.. just make sure you’ve got permission to post photographs.. 😊
I don't know about other guys, but I would not offer my bed along with my girl in it after drinking all night. The couch, the floor, my bathtub. But not my bed. His friend was hoping for something thing to happen with you. That's what spooning is for. You should not have waited til he passed out if you were unconfortable. With your boyfriend passed out. The friend could have been more physical, and forced himself on you. Then blame it on the alcohol or say you were teasing him by rubbing on him.Don't ever let your boyfriend make decissions like that again. It was weird this time. next time could be real bad deal.
Permission? From who may I ask? You mean do I have permission to post my hubbys Photo along with me? Lol you get people like that?
Assuming you’re the woman in the photo, no one had any idea who the man was. And yes, people have been known to post all kinds of photos here! 😛
The way the boyfriend stated to his friend made it sound like an invitation to have sex with them or his G/F? I don't know why she would just lay there, and let him grope you like that? Instead, you stayed there until he passed out. What would she have done if he pulled out his d..k, and started rubbing on her? As soon as the friend put himself between you two. You should have gone to the couch if you were that uncomfortable with him spooning you. The boyfriend could have had a serious problem the next day if friend would have forced himself on her. And the friend would just say you invited me to sleep with you two. My question is why did she stay there, and let him touch her the way he was. Then the next morning just blow it off as (yeah that was weird)! WTH!
Exactly. It was a really strange way to try and set up a 3some. Has he talked or shared fantasies about a ***** or watching you with someone else? Talk to him about it and see what he was thinking.
That's what I'm saying. In all reality if it's something you two have talked about or fantasized about by all means explore it. It might be that SPARK that will strengthen and intensify your relationship.
The first year we were married , my wife and I went camping with another couple. We set up the tent, spread both double sleeping bags out and spent the evening drinking around the fire. Finally we decided to go to sleep,so the girls went in and got ready for bed while Ted and I had another drink. We then joined our wives in our respective double sleeping bags. It was really hot so soon my wife and I moved on top of our bag. Sometime during the night they must have too. I awoke around sunrise to find my wife sleeping mext to me and Ted had rolled over and was big spooning her. My always wife sleeps in just her night shirt and Ted and I were in our boxers. However Dee’s night shirt was around her waist and Ted’s morning ***** was poking out and against her bare backside. He also had his arm over her cupping her firm 34Bbreast. I watched and listened and there was no movement so I took it as innocent during sleep cuddling. I had mixed feelings and watched both a bit jealous but also turned on .After awhile Ted rolled over and big spooned his wife.
Nobody ever said anything so I am not sure if either even knew it happened.
It was all your fault there wasn't a *****. If you had just respond. Be careful horny guys will try again.
Sounds like either set up for failure by jealous bf, or soft way of ***** or sharing... Idk one of them I'd suspect

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