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Dec 30th, 2019

Btw, shes heading to college this coming fall
I can do bad all by myself 👅💦👅👅👅👅💦💦
So, as I’m sure you all know if you’ve been following my blog for a little while, my whole inspiration for starting this dirty-ass blog in the first place was a classmate of mine in my Wednesday lecture class. We’ll call him Jason. Jason is about 6'3" and black as the night. He’s super dark. He keeps a neat beard that’s sort of long but not gross (picture James Harden’s beard but a little shorter). He likes to wear gym clothes to class like almost every day so he walks into the lecture hall all the time in a tightish workout shirt and sweatpants. Because his shirt is pretty tight, you can see that he’s absolutely ripped. I don’t know how much time this dude spends in the gym but I’m sure it’s significant. I can practically count his abs under his shirt and his arms are thick and strong–like he could lift a car or some shit, I have no idea.
Anywho, his top half is so buff and strong and all by itself his top half is enough to make my ovaries turn cartwheels–but then there’s the bottom half. Especially on days when he wears grey sweatpants, I can definitely see the outline of his cock hanging down his pantleg. It shifts and moves when he walks and please believe me when I tell you, it’s as big as my arm. At least. It’s massive. The first time he walked in the room, I’m pretty sure I gasped out loud. The physical reaction that my body had to seeing this man for the first time was like nothing I’ve ever experienced before. My heart started racing. My vision blurred around the edges. It was suddenly very VERY warm. I was suddenly hyper aware of my hair and outfit for the day (first day I wore yoga pants and had my hair in the messiest of buns and basically looked like utter trash). Anyway, I’ve never wanted someone so badly in my life. I’ve never just seen someone in the world and had the appearance of their entire physical being cause such an extreme immediate physical and emotional reaction. I wanted him inside me so bad. But more than that, I wanted to go to the movies with him. I wanted to meet his mom. I wanted to sleep in his bed. I wanted to be his.
The first day of class he sat on the opposite side of the aisle in the lecture hall, except he was right in-between the professor and I. I could pretend I was looking at this old sawdust-spewing professor, when in reality I couldn’t take my eyes off this man. I didn’t know his name then. I had never heard his voice. But I couldn’t take my eyes off him just the same. He was so gorgeous in literally every fucking way, I don’t know how else to describe it. You’ll just have to trust me. I feel like Bella trying to describe Edward–there’s only so many times I can say “perfect” before it just becomes bad writing. But that doesn’t make it any less true. The man is a God.
BUT, of course, I have a boyfriend. We’ve been together since high school and there’s really no getting around it: our families would be devastated if we broke up. I’m bored to tears with the relationship, he has never really satisfied me sexually, and he can be a snobby little prick sometimes. Also his dad’s the preacher at my parent’s church. But seeing Jason for the first time awakened something primal in me that I had always known was there (I’ve fingered myself to BBC porn since I was 12), but had no idea I could ever actually experience for myself in real life. In order to channel my unreasonable tortuous desire for this God of a man, I made this blog. My infatuation with all things BBC needs to be fed and you beautiful followers do an amazing job at that. 😘
Over the course of the semester I have tried to discreetly find out as much about Jason as I can. I couldn’t let anyone in my sorority know what I was up to because my boyfriend is in a frat and a lot of my sister’s boyfriends are in the same frat so I basically couldn’t give any hint at all that I was interested in this gorgeous black man in class. I was able to talk to Jason a couple times in class throughout the semester when he’d turn around and make a comment about how boring the class is and our eyes would make contact and I would feel my face get all kinds of hot and my arms would suddenly feel strange, like they didn’t belong on my body, and I would sputter some insane response and then spend the rest of the day reliving it and kicking myself for not being better on my feet. I’m hot! I shouldn’t have to feel like this just because of some damn boy! He should be begging ME!
By talking to classmates, I was able to gather that Jason is not involved in any of the Greek life on campus, but a lot of the frat guys see him at the rec center every day lifting ungodly amounts of weight and “making them look bad.” He’s apparently a commuter student who lives off campus. But that’s literally all I know. I didn’t even know his name.
Today was the last class meeting of my Wednesday lecture. I prayed all morning that he would show up for class. I had no idea what I was going to do but I knew for sure that I couldn’t leave and never see him again. So I got up earlier than normal and picked out a super cute outfit: white shorts and a blue and white striped top that showed off plenty of cleavage. I curled my hair, put my tanning shimmer lotion on, did my makeup, and decided on a push-up bra to make the girls really pop. The outfit makes me look a little like a sexy tan sailor and I love it. It’s my favorite. He was going to notice me today, goddammit. I got to class early and sat in my usual seat and did my best to come up with a plan. If he also got there early, before any of my sisters or my boyfriend’s friends, then I’d try to at least get his full name and friend him on Facebook. If not, then I’d have to come up with a new plan.
Of course, as soon as I settled on this plan of action, my boyfriend’s dopey-ass frat buddies came in talking about the NBA finals and being obnoxious af. My sisters soon followed. Jason didn’t show up until right before the professor. No time to talk to him at all. Shit!
So now i needed a brand new plan. How in the hell was I going to get alone with this guy right after class without tipping off either my sorority sisters or my boyfriend’s goober frat brothers? I’d be so obvious if I just went and started asking him for his number in front of everyone.
I sat through the whole stupid lecture and thought and thought and thought and no good plan ever came to me. I kept glancing over at Jason and seeing his beautiful skin and strong masculine body and my frustration was so high I could have burst into tears. I was going to have to let him leave without getting a way to contact him again. 30,000 people at this school and I’m gonna have to let the one perfect man disappear into the crowd. Just my luck. I swallowed back tears of frustration. Can’t ruin my makeup. I still have a chance.
The class ended and I had no plan at all. I legitimately saw no way out. I put my stuff in my bag as slowly as I possibly could, hoping all my sisters would go on without me. Of course, they’re amazing so they waited for me. Jason was already out the door anyway, so it didn’t really matter. I swallowed the lump of tears in my throat and smiled and talked with my sisters while we walked to the student union to have lunch. I didn’t see which way Jason went but I felt so fucking miserable knowing that I had failed to even get his name.
We got to the union and it was packed, just as it always is at lunch time when classes are in session. I got in line with a couple of my sisters at the pizza restaurant–they were talking a lot and I was seething on the inside. I couldn’t believe I was so dumb. I couldn’t believe I let him get away. I couldn’t believe I was so silly to think he’d be into me anyway.
Then, out of nowhere, interrupting my internal monologue of self-insults, some dumbass in front of us tried to toss a cup of marinara sauce to his friend behind me. The top on the marinara must have come off mid-toss because marinara sauce went all over the front of my blue and white striped top. Some of it even got in my hair. The combined rage from this whole fucking waste of a day came out in one insane shriek. I honestly don’t even remember everything I said. I definitely called the guy that threw the sauce a “fucking cockring” and, in my haste and anger, told my sisters to just get the pizza while I stomped off to the bathroom.
I was so mad at the whole stupid fucking day that I’m surprised the marinara sauce didn’t start boiling on my way to the bathroom. Not only did I just lose the only man who’s ever made me feel like I think physical attraction is supposed to feel just by being near me, but now I’ve also got fucking red sauce all over my favorite outfit.
The cleanup was a nightmare. The sauce will probably not come out and there was absolutely nothing I could do in the bathroom to make it any better. Putting water on it just made my shirt see-through and I didn’t have anything at all in my purse that would help (I have one sister who steals my goddamn tide pens all the fucking time and I hate her for it). I don’t know if you’ve ever tried to get globs if marinara sauce out of blonde hair before, but it’s awful. I left the bathroom looking even worse than when I went in.
As soon as I turned the corner from leaving the bathroom, I suddenly hit what felt like a giant wall. “Whoa there!” A big arm grabbed me around the waste to keep me from falling down. It took me a confused second before I realized that it was Jason. My body started producing heat instantly. He stood me back up straight. I was so embarrassed. I looked at the floor and tried to mumble something about being sorry for not seeing him.
“No no! That’s okay! I was actually looking for you. My buddy was trying to get marinara sauce for me and he doesn’t use his brain sometimes and he threw it when he shouldn’t have. But I always carry a tide pen in my backpack. I don’t know how much help it will be though…” He looked down at my ruined shirt and sort of trailed off in the cutest fucking way imaginable. His voice was so sexy–deep and smooth–and it woke me up to the fact that this was my chance.
I raised my eyes from the floor and looked at his GORGEOUS fucking face. My heart was pounding. My vision was very fuzzy. I felt like my stomach was turning over and over inside me. There was a dull machine-like hum in my ears. I was suddenly very aware of where my hands were and what I was doing with them. I took a deep sigh, narrowed my eyes in a playfully angry way, and sternly said, “I think you owe me a new shirt, Mr Muscles. This was my favorite one.” Then I winked and smiled and gave him my cell number.
He’s been sending me links all night to try to find a suitable replacement for my now-ruined favorite shirt.
What he doesn’t know is that I picked my shirt out today only to attract him. And it definitely did its job.
God I hope there’s more to come, guys. I haven’t been so fucking giddy in months.

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