Sexy Three Some
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Sexy Three Some
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Zachary Zane is a Brooklyn-based writer, speaker, and activist whose work focuses on lifestyle, sexuality, and culture. He was formerly the digital associate editor at OUT Magazine and currently has a queer cannabis column, Puff Puff YASS, at Civilized.
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At some point in your life, you’ve likely fantasized about having a threesome. You’re not alone, my friend. When Men's Health advisory board member Justin Lehmiller, Ph.D., host of the Sex and Psychology Podcast , author of Tell Me What You Want , surveyed over 4,000 people on their sexual fantasies, he found that having a threesome is the most common sexual fantasy among Americans. Ninety-five percent of men and 87% of women said they had fantasized about sex with multiple partners.
We're here to talk about the best threesome sex positions—and we'll get there, we promise! But before you jump into bed with a third person, there are a few important threesome tips to keep in mind. First, if you’re still looking for a third, you should check out our list of the best threesome apps . (And don’t assume just because a woman is bisexual, she’ll want to have a threesome with you. Bi women are often harassed on dating apps, constantly asked if they’d be down to have a threesome, and they’re tired of it !)
Once you know who you'll be getting down with, you should talk to everyone involved before stripping naked, setting clear boundaries and clarifying expectations. Quite a few things can go wrong during a threesome , but by talking it out with all members beforehand, you'll up the chances of everyone coming away sexually satisfied.
Now, onto those threesome sex positions we promised! It can be complicated trying to fit everyone's bodies together. Six is a lot of limbs! That's why we're here to talk about the best threesome sex positions, including options for bi threesomes, where everyone is into each other, and "devil's" threesomes , where two of the participants aren't playing with each other.
So without further ado, here are 10 threesome sex positions that are super hot and totally doable. (For more sexy ways to switch up your bedroom routine, check out our list of the all-time best sex positions .)
How to do it: While one partner straddles your waist and junk in a traditional cowgirl position, the other straddles your face allowing you to go down on them.
Pro tip: The person sitting on your face can straddle you either way, but it’s typically better if they straddle you while facing the other partner, so they, too, can kiss and touch each other if they want.
How to do it: You’re the “caboose” of this train, penetrating your partner doggy style. The middle partner is then either digitally penetrating or eating out the head of the train, who’s also on their knees, bent forward in a classic doggy style position.
How to do it: Your two partners are on their knees in front of you, both blowing you at the same time.
Pro tip: It’s best if one blower focuses on you balls while the other focuses on your penis. Depending on if you’re into it, one partner could actually be on their knees, rimming you from behind while the other person goes down on you from the front.
How to do it: You’re having sex with the first partner doggy style. The third partner is lying on their back positioned in a manner that allows the middle person to go down on them.
How to do it: Everyone is lying on their sides in a circular position eating out/blowing one another.
Pro tip: I wouldn’t do this if the people you’re with aren’t roughly your size. If you’re a foot taller than the other partners, this may be difficult to navigate.
How to do it: The partner in the middle gets penetrated from behind and performs a BJ at the same time.
Pro tip: I'm personally not into touching both hands at the top to create the appearance of the Eiffel Tower, but if you feel the urge, I’m not going yuck your yum.
How to do it: One person lies on their back underneath the vulva-owning partner, who's also on their back. The other partner penetrates them in the missionary position.
Pro tip: Porn stars deserve a raise because they make this look so easy, when in fact, it’s quite difficult. But here are some tips that can help: Have the person with the bigger penis be in the backdoor, because the angle makes it’s more likely he’s going to slip out. Both penis-owners should not attempt to thrust at the same time, because if you do, one of you will slip out almost immediately.
How to do it: This is the same as the Doggy Deluxe, except with two penis-owners. One of them is having sex with the vulva-owning partner in doggy style. The other person lies on their back to easily receive oral.
How to do it: Everyone lies on their sides and penetrates the person in front of them either anally or vaginally.
Pro Tip: Really squish yourselves together for this position. If you have too much space between you, someone is going to slip out.
How to do it: It's like the 2009 horror movie...except actually good. In this position, all three people are on their knees, rimming the person in front of them.
Pro Tip: Despite the awful (but hilarious) name, this is amazing for guys who are into analingus. It’s also a great position to start in, because from there, it’s easy to seamlessly move into a number of the more penetrative sex positions listed above, like the Doggy Train or Doggy Deluxe.
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Nothing compares to watching three dead-drop gorgeous teen girlfriends who gathered in one bed for a kinky lesbian party and are eager to share their sexual experience. They are all blessed ... Read all Nothing compares to watching three dead-drop gorgeous teen girlfriends who gathered in one bed for a kinky lesbian party and are eager to share their sexual experience. They are all blessed with charming faces and perfect bodies that can make a dead man hard. And all their though... Read all Nothing compares to watching three dead-drop gorgeous teen girlfriends who gathered in one bed for a kinky lesbian party and are eager to share their sexual experience. They are all blessed with charming faces and perfect bodies that can make a dead man hard. And all their thoughts and desires are focused on getting and giving sexual pleasure. Totally aware of their k... Read all
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Threesomes top the charts of many a sexual fantasy. Their popularity knows no bounds. According to a survey by ABC N ews , 21 percent of Americans have had a threesome fantasy.
So, what about those who have actually gone a step further and had sex in a trio, whether as a joining part or as part of a couple? What are those experiences like? We all want to know.
And if you’re thinking of trying a threesome, it doesn't hurt to know what you’re in for, plus how (or if) it will affect your relationships with the people involved.
To get the lowdown, we asked seven real people about their threesome experiences and how bringing this fantasy to life affected them afterward.
"My partner and I spent time with a female friend visiting from Canada. We spent an entire day in each other’s company, talking and laughing. We talked so late into the night that it made sense for her to stay at our place instead of driving her back to her hotel room. The three of us came together for a group hug and she nuzzled my neck. It was all the encouragement I needed. Our hands and mouths were everywhere at once. My partner was content to watch but in the heat of the moment, I desperately wanted to see them together. I invited him in—with her consent—and we switched back and forth between each other. I was overcome with emotion—positive emotions. I’d never experienced my partner’s pleasure from the outside looking in, but I could think of nothing better. I truly felt like my heart expanded to encompass the moment and their shared passion. I’d never loved him more than I did in that moment.
"After it was over and she went back home, we went through a bit of grief from missing her. My partner and I spent a lot of time checking with each other—and her. We talked over the details, and the few issues we’d felt. Specifically, I felt excluded once or twice—not from their play but from knowing about it. That’s when we learned that I was comfortable with much of what they did together (without me), but nothing could feel like a secret or an unknown. That was a moment in time when we learned we might have the capacity for a poly relationship and allowing other people into our relationship. We established ground rules (based on what we knew at the time) and communicated. We were fortunate that our threesome ended so well. We’re still friends with that person and there’s talk of having another experience when she visits again." — Kayla, 38
"While living in San Francisco, I was invited to a private party in Napa—a bunch of lovely ladies and some power couples in a lavish vineyard mansion. We had dinner and plenty of wine and started playing silly games. I remember being invited to bed by a couple—I had never had a threesome—but I was curious. I liked the gal but the guy was okay—I didn't want to have sex with him so I made my boundary clear upfront: I didn't want to be kissed by him or to have sex with him, but he was welcome to touch and please me. He was very respectful. His girlfriend and I came and we fell asleep.
"The next morning...we all had started getting naughty again...then suddenly one of the other girls happened to walk into our room and next thing I knew—she joined us and started eating me out. EVERYTHING was so surreal. But it was fun. Sorta like a bucket list I was happy to check off." — Erin*, 34
Watch men and women come up with names for these adventurous sex positions:
"I have had multiple threesomes in my life. Most of them took place during my late teens, early 20s, and before I reached age 30.
"There were two instances where I was actually in monogamous loving relationships and the other woman was a friend of my then girlfriend. It was something spontaneous after having alcohol and listening to music. The women didn't spend the night either time.
"There wasn't a discussion about it in either instance, and the next morning I woke up almost feeling as if it were a dream. The other women never came by my place again and when we were together socially at events, it was as if it never happened."— Kevin, 60
(Add something extra to your sex life with the JimmyJane Form 8 vibe from the Women's Health Boutique.)
"When I was in high school, I got super high with my girlfriend and this guy we were mutual friends with. I can’t even remember how it happened, but suddenly she was going down on him and I was making out with him. This went on for a long time, like, maybe forty minutes. There was no sex. It was just a weird experience. I’m 100 percent gay so, I’m not even sure why this seemed like a good idea at the time. We never spoke of it again after it happened. I kept dating the same girl for a while. Eventually we broke up for unrelated reasons." — Brittney, 27
"It happened several years ago, with a friend I'd known for some time. We weren't particularly close, but always warm to each other when we were together. She and her fiancé wanted to experiment (we were, then, in our late 30s/early 40s), and I was safe and just outside of their regular, everyday group of friends. It was a loving, friendly experience—he and I decided early on (almost unspoken), that it would be all about giving my friend the ultimate fantasy , so we let her direct the pace and the activities.
"For me, it was an absolutely incredible experience; casual, fun, warm and lighthearted, with incredible passionate feelings wrapped all around. It only happened that one time. I think they've gone on to have a polyamorous relationship and have been together for five or so years now. She and I still write and text with the occasional phone call." — Jake*, 44
"I was out for a friend's birthday, and I told him one of my life goals was to have a threesome with two dudes who weren't creepy. I also said it would probably never happen.
"The next day, the same friend had a party at the apartment he lived in with a bunch of my other friends. A guy started chatting me up, and he seemed nice. Then a guy I'd been laying the groundwork earlier that week showed up. Turned out, they were best friends. I felt a little moral dilemma, since I didn't have a strong opinion about which guy I'd rather be with. They didn't seem to mind that both of them were flirting with me at the same time, though.
"As I got a little drunker, I decided to literally grab one, kiss him real hard, then turn to the other and do the same (my logic in doing that is still a little fuzzy). However, they both decided to roll with it. None of us lived within walking distance, so we ended up hooking up on the stairs to the basement. I ended up with bruises at even intervals on my back—right under my butt, mid-back, and neck.
"While there wasn't any issue in the moment (they were basically like 'we both get to bang the hot chick'), they were also slightly interested in something further with me. But both ended up backing off for the sake of their friendship." — Janet, 28
"My best friend and I met this guy when we were on vacation in Hawaii. We’d never hooked up before, but decided we wanted to have a threesome with this guy. He was a hot, older surfer dude. The threesome started out really well. We were all about it and all a little drunk. After a while, though, it started getting awkward and weird. Going down on a girl I’ve known since I was thirteen, and have been through so much with, made me uncomfortable.
"After it was over, we didn’t talk about it for a couple of days. Eventually, when we got back from vacation, we hashed it out. Things weren’t the same for a long time. We didn’t hang out as much as we used to. It was painful. Luckily, after a year or so we reconnected on a closer level and now things are back to normal. I didn’t expect my threesome experience to affect my relationship with my best friend that much. It was a really eye-opening experience." — Marie, 25
"After ending a five year relationship with a male partner I was really excited to dive back into dating women (duh) and also wanted to enter back into the casual sex arena. I hopped onto the traditional and not so traditional apps (Bumble and Feeld) and ended up quickly clicking with a gorgeous redheaded goddess in a somewhat open marriage.
"After our first date she invited me to a concert with her, her husband and her group of friends. Plenty of drinks later the three of us stumbled into my apartment. I had been a part of a few threesomes before, but never with a married couple and honestly it was the BEST one I have ever been in because of how open everyone was, how well they anticipated what each of them wanted, and also because they were both focused on pleasing me (maybe I just love being the guest star). To be honest, beforehand, the thought of having a threesome with a couple made me nervous because of potential jealousy issues—but there weren't any here." — Lynn, 26
Gigi Engle is a sex educator and writer living in Chicago. Follow her on Instagram and Twitter at @GigiEngle.
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