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2021-11-19 21:15:35　来源: 莓辣MAYLOVE

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你好：）认识莓辣这么久了，你加上我们酷且话多的AI小助脚了吗！欢迎添加微信号：（meilalittlefeet），立刻获取进入莓辣专属社群的钥匙，更有1v1答疑，票圈热辣话题互动，偶尔也一起搞搞事。
刚好上个月我们去广州的 “非凡集市” 溜达了一圈，一个kinker们（有各种x癖的小伙伴）逛逛拍拍买买的多元空间。
在被现场各位身怀绝技又貌美如花的摊主&游客迷得神魂颠倒的同时，还看到了一大波好玩又实用的 bdsm道具。
但由于逛得太嗨忘了拍照（对不起），只能拼拼凑凑搜搜刮刮勉强带大家云体验一下。
打又包括普通的spanking（用手），还有常见的使用工具如手拍，鞭子。它们有不同的种类，材质通常为皮革、橡胶、尼龙等。
手拍基本大同小异，一般都在形状尺寸和设计上做文章，比如什么可爱猫猫爪啦，炫酷配色之类的。
鞭子作为可以全身上下广泛使用的工具，通常有长鞭，短鞭和尾数不同的各种散鞭.
这类鞭子长度可达2-3米，有很强杀伤力，需要十分熟悉力量把控和技巧。一般只有经验丰富的老手艺人或专业的表演者才会使用。
而短鞭和不同尾数的各种散鞭，相比之下容易上手很多。它们的长相材质各异，属于是挑到你满意为止。尾数和材质不同，在痛感上会有一些差异。
鞭子多几根也不嫌多，可以入手一些再挑选比较，顺便满足一些友友奇怪的收藏癖。
当你背对伴侣或被蒙上眼睛时，不知道蜡油会滴落在身体的哪一寸，会以怎样的痛感亲吻你，那种紧张又期待的心情，是欲望的绝妙加成。
我们买到的普通蜡烛，一般由石蜡制成，熔点在80℃左右。80℃的蜡油滴在身上，火烧猪毛怎么样，你就怎么样。
滴蜡用的蜡烛是低温蜡烛，材质多为大豆蜡、蜂蜡等，熔点均在四五十度左右。
这个温度不会灼伤皮肤，只会产生灼痛感，刺激肾上腺素和内啡肽的分泌，让大脑感到兴奋。
且蜡油凝固后用小刮板或手就能直接将蜡块剥离皮肤，不会很麻烦。在床上玩的时候还可以垫上一次性床单，这样就不用怕弄脏被子啦。
一般像胸口、大腿内侧等皮肤薄的地方对痛感知比较强烈，可以先从手背手臂等皮厚的地方开始尝试，再循序渐进，同时根据接受程度调整蜡烛离皮肤的距离。
蜡烛有不同的造型、颜色、味道可以选择，不用的时候摆在家里也可以当装饰物。
冬天到了，记得买根低温蜡烛取取暖。滴蜡操作起来不难，可玩性也很高，只要你手艺高超，在伴侣身上画一幅清明上河图也不是不行。
记不记得武侠小说里，主角常常在眼睛光荣负伤后就蜕变成能听风识剑的王者？为什么有人会觉得调暗灯光，蒙眼鼓掌比灯火通明有意思？其实这俩有异曲同工之妙。
感觉剥夺最开始应用在心理学研究上，如让被试者戴上耳塞眼罩绝缘手套后一直睡觉、将外界刺激输入降低；又或者是关小黑屋等的可怕实验。
但后来人们又发现短时间的剥夺有利于放松和冥想，于是这又被用作心理疗法。
在成套的道具里，眼罩口球手脚铐通常是标配，作为情趣，它们也是感觉剥夺的手段之一。
此时伴侣的一举一动都会给你带来更大的想象空间，同时你也可能更沉浸、更专注自己身体的感受。
而口球和手铐带来的语言限制和行动限制，那种任人宰割的感觉，大家就自行体会吧。
接下来要说的，其实是各种玩法中技术难度较大的Bondage（束缚），也就是BDSM中"B"的来源。
Bondage简单的说就是用绳索将肢体绑起来限制行动，有时会配合手铐、专用的各种工具将伴侣固定到某一物体上。
首先绳子有很多种绑法，根据调戏对方的需求不同，对身体的限制程度、暴露部位也不同。
常见的有吊手缚，龟甲缚、驷马束缚等等等等各种绑法，而且每个绳结、每种绑法都有自己的特点。
玩绳是对手艺的考验，可能需要点工匠精神。绑得好看是曲线曼妙、风情万种，绑不好就是卤羊腿、卤大鹅、卤猪肘。
捆绑用的绳子通常有麻绳、棉绳和棉麻混纺的绳子，常用的直径是6-7mm，长度根据样式不同的需求有8米、10米不等。
棉绳和棉麻绳较为柔软，适合新手练习和绑着玩，但不怎么耐用，偶尔还会掉絮絮。
麻绳有比较大的摩擦力，更有“束缚感”，它们一般经过加工处理，会除去过于粗糙的毛刺。平时自己在家玩的时候也不怕弄伤皮肤。
专业的绳缚表演用的也是麻绳，但对材质、质感和效果的要求就比我们日常用的要高很多了。
它可以是涉及性的行为、是调情的手段，是Discipline的辅助；也可以是不涉及性的，比如你和伴侣在家无聊当成益智小游戏绑着玩顺便拍拍照。
但也要知道，它只是一根绳子！想要如何诠释它全都在你，你开心才是最重要的事。
如果有人深情款款地对你说“做我的猫”，你当下的反应可能是被油到把三天前夜宵里的一根豆芽菜都完整吐到对方脸上的程度。
但在BDSM中，这是 Animal roleplay（动物扮演）的一种。
你可以是可爱的猫猫（kitten play），戴上毛茸茸的发箍、尾巴在伴侣的腿上兴奋蠕动,
又或是变成勇敢狗勾（puppy play/canine），在卧室（当然户外也不是不行）忘情地爬爬与奔跑。
与此同时，你需要一个精美的项圈or自己的专属名牌，再配套精致的锁链，才方便被牵着兜风。
有条件的宠物之家，还可以添置一些宠物家具，比如床、笼子等，就像下面这种：
Animal roleplay相比前面来说，会涉及到更多言行上的羞耻感、心理上的支配与臣服、权力的不对等，会更属于Discipline的范畴。
这不一定对所有人的胃口，所以在你和伴侣愉快玩耍之前，一定要记得充分沟通，了解清楚彼此的接受度和底线哦。
说完以上这些比较常见的工具，还想说的是，不论怎么玩，用什么玩，最重要的是你和伴侣都能在其中获得同样的愉悦。
[1]https://www.zhihu.com/question/34957590/answer/60525318
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Thijs Römer in 2013
- Credit:
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The Public Prosecution Service (OM) will prosecute actor Thijs Römer for three sex offenses involving three underage girls who were between the ages of 14 and 16 at the time of the alleged crimes. The Northern Netherlands district office of the OM confirmed the case to ANP after the allegations were first reported by RTL Boulevard.
The offenses date from 2015 to the end of 2017. The OM said that the accusations do not regard physical contact between Römer and the victims. Earlier this year, a 20-year-old woman also used Twitter to accuse Römer of sexual misconduct in an incident she said occurred when she was 14.
Römer denied those allegations at the time. "Until now, I have not felt compelled to respond to this," the actor wrote on Twitter in May. "The story about a 14-year-old girl with whom I would have had inappropriate contact, however, goes a bridge too far for me as a father of a teenage daughter and a sane person." The woman later said she regretted sharing her accusations on Twitter, but did not retract them.
In September, Römer announced that he had cleared his agenda "for the foreseeable future.” The actor said the reason was that he had worked too much in the past year and therefore wanted a break.
Maartje Schaap, who represents two of the women who accused Römer, said on Thursday that the women are pleased there is now a case progressing against the actor. The two women have been "anxiously looking forward to this day, when more could be announced," said Schaap.
The case will not be heard in 2022, but will be dealt with next year, according to the OM.
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Bobby McCulley, left, and Dustin Stacy exchange vows on Nov. 12 during their wedding in Cocoa, Florida, officiated by the Rev. Alison Harrity, rector of St. Richard’s Episcopal Church in Winter Park. Photo: Jordan Hurst
[Episcopal News Service] The Diocese of Central Florida forbids weddings of same-sex couples. It also allows them.
At the root of that contradiction is a diocesan canon restricting marriage to “one woman and one man.” The restriction remains on the books despite The Episcopal Church’s General Convention voting in 2018 to require all dioceses to accommodate same-sex couples wishing to marry . Central Florida Bishop Greg Brewer said he would oblige, but so far, marriage equality in the Orlando-based diocese is limited to one parish, St. Richard’s Episcopal Church in Winter Park. Its rector, the Rev. Alison Harrity, is the only priest who has asked for and received permission from Brewer to marry gay and lesbian couples – a permission to essentially violate the diocese’s marriage canon.
Harrity, in a phone interview with Episcopal News Service, said she is grateful for the opportunity “to ensure that the sacraments are available to all people, regardless of their sexual orientation.” At the same time, she wishes the diocese would be more open in addressing the discrimination underlying diocesan policies. Last weekend, she officiated at the wedding of Bobby McCulley and Dustin Stacy, who said they couldn’t marry in their home parish an hour away in Cocoa because Brewer has only accommodated the rites at St. Richard’s.
McCulley and Stacy were shocked when the priest in Cocoa told them she could not and would not officiate at their wedding, referring them to Harrity. “It was hurtful,” McCulley told ENS by phone. “I truthfully feel like I’m a second-class Episcopalian. Dustin and I do not truly matter in the eyes of the leadership of the diocese.”
Now, as Central Florida prepares to elect a bishop to succeed Brewer when he retires in June 2023, the gap between the diocesan canons and churchwide policies has become an election issue for the diocese, known as one of the most theologically conservative in The Episcopal Church. A diocesan questionnaire asked the three bishop candidates on the slate for the Jan. 14 election whether they would obey Central Florida’s canon opposing same-sex marriage and the General Convention resolution allowing same-sex marriage. All three said, yes, they would obey both.
General Convention first approved trial rites for same-sex couples in 2015, following up in 2018 by extending access to those rites to all U.S.-based dioceses. Even so, Central Florida is one of at least three dioceses, along with Albany and Dallas, where same-sex marriage is still canonically prohibited – where the answer to marriage equality is both no and yes.
“We are trying to thread that needle,” the Rev. Tom Rutherford, president of the Central Florida Standing Committee, told ENS by phone. “We are trying to follow the rules and be respectful of the General Convention resolution as well as our diocesan canon.”
The Central Florida Diocesan Convention could eliminate such ambiguity by repealing the restrictive marriage canon, though Brewer blocked such an effort in early 2018. The convention’s next meeting is in February. “If somebody wants to submit a resolution about that canon … they’re certainly welcome to do that,” Rutherford said.
Reconsidering the marriage canon, however, is not an immediate priority of diocesan leadership, according to the Rev. Scott Holcombe, Central Florida’s canon to the ordinary for congregational development. “After our election of a new bishop … and the confirmation process, we will turn our attention to other matters,” Holcombe told ENS by email. “Right now, our energies are focused on the bishop election.”
As bishop, Brewer is “the final interpreter of the canons,” Rutherford said, and it is up to the bishop “how we walk that tightrope” of complying with the 79th General Convention’s Resolution B012. For Brewer and several other conservative diocesan bishops, threading the needle on marriage equality has meant referring priests and parishes to outside bishops who approve of same-sex marriage, through a process often called delegated episcopal pastoral oversight, or DEPO.
Bobby McCulley, left, and Dustin Stacy were told by one Central Florida priest that she could not and would not marry them. She referred them to the Rev. Alison Harrity, who welcomed them at St. Richard’s Episcopal Church, Winter Park. Photo: Jordan Hurst
Under that option, Harrity was able to marry McCulley and Stacy on Nov. 12, in a chapel at the homeless shelter in Cocoa where McCulley works. McCulley, 30, called it one of the happiest days of his life. “Dustin was literally placed in my life by God,” he told ENS. “He’s my rock. I couldn’t do life without him.”
Resolution B012 does not require or even specify a formal DEPO process, but that is the prevailing conservative interpretation of the resolution, which was accepted by bishops in 2018 as a compromise between progressives and conservatives.
The basis for that compromise was first set forth in 2015, when the 78 th General Convention deleted the reference to “a man and a woman” in the church’s marriage canon , while adding the term “the couple.” It also approved trial-use marriage liturgies and made them available to same-sex couples, though their use was subject to a bishop’s discretion.
Three years later, Brewer was one of eight bishops who still would not permit their use in their dioceses. Resolution B012 in 2018 ensured equal access to the rites, in all dioceses where civil law permits same-sex marriage, while acknowledging that such marriages are contrary to some bishops’ theological beliefs. In such cases, the bishops “shall invite, as necessary, another bishop of this church to provide pastoral support to the couple, the member of the clergy involved and the congregation or worshipping community in order to fulfill the intention of this resolution.”
After the passage of the resolution, at one extreme, then-Albany Bishop William Love continued to refuse to allow clergy in his northern New York diocese to marry same-sex couples, prompting Presiding Bishop Michael Curry to pursue disciplinary action against him .
Like Central Florida, Albany says in its diocesan canons that clergy can only officiate at wedding ceremonies “between one man and one woman.” A disciplinary panel concluded that the diocesan canon did not absolve Love of his responsibility to carry out churchwide policies enacted by General Convention, including B012. He was forced to resign in February 2021 and was removed from episcopal ministry two months later. He has since left The Episcopal Church to join the conservative Anglican Church in North America .
Most other conservative bishops instead chose to enlist a more progressive bishop to assume pastoral oversight of same-sex weddings. Tennessee Bishop John Bauerschmidt established such a process in his diocese, as did Bishop John Howard in the Diocese of Florida, though some Florida Episcopalians initially complained Howard’s process was cumbersome and didn’t live up to the spirit of B012.
In Texas, the Diocese of Dallas’ convention in 2017 had voted down a proposal to eliminate the anti-LGBTQ+ language in the diocese’s marriage canon . A year later, in response to General Convention’s Resolution B012, three Dallas parishes asked permission to marry same-sex couples, and Bishop George Sumner allowed it by referring those three parishes to then-Missouri Bishop Wayne Smith for pastoral oversight.
Some priests in parishes with these arrangements have expressed mixed feelings, however, especially in dioceses like Dallas where the bishop chose to relinquish pastoral oversight of the parishes in nearly all matters, not just same-sex weddings. The Rev. Paul Klitzke, rector of Church of the Ascension in Dallas, told ENS at the time that he thought more congregations would have sought permission to celebrate same-sex couples’ weddings “if it didn’t mean a change in the relationship with the bishop diocesan.”
Such arrangements also have resulted in patchwork access to the rites in conservative dioceses, since not all parishes or priests request permission to offer them.
In Central Florida, the restrictive marriage canon dates to 2004 , approved amid the churchwide debate over the 2003 consecration of now-retired New Hampshire Bishop Gene Robinson as the church’s first openly gay bishop. The Central Florida canon reads : “All members of the clergy of this diocese may allow to take place in their cures, officiate at, bless or participate in, only those unions prescribed by Holy Scripture: the wedding of one woman and one man. Said clergy are forbidden to allow to take place in their cures, officiate at, bless or participate in any other unions, as proscribed by Holy Scripture.”
Clergy and lay leaders at St. Richard’s have long sought to welcome same-sex couples interested in marrying there. Documents archived on the chu
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