Sexiest Orgasms
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Need-to-know advice for a more orgasmic life
Reaching orgasm can be, well, hard, if you're not in the right position. That's why WH spoke to Christine Webber, a Harley Street psychotherapist and somatic sex coach Stella Anna Sonnenbaum , to discuss the best sex positions for female orgasm. You're welcome.
Before we start, a quick disclaimer: orgasm does not always have to be the end goal of sex, for either party. But given the 'orgasm gap' – the reality that men and people with penises are far more likely to come while getting down than women and people with vaginas – it is important to talk about the disparity.
Straight up, if you have a vagina and enjoy sex with someone with a penis, you'll know that orgasming via sheer penetration is pretty uncommon. Women and people with vaginas, as you probably know, get their pleasurable feelings mostly from the clitoris. Typically, for that reason, you probably need your clitoris to be stimulated during sex – and, in many positions, this simply doesn't happen.
If you're having trouble reaching climax more generally, the best thing you can do is to start by learning how to orgasm on your own through masturbation. Once you can climax easily on your own, you'll find it much easier to have really exciting times with a partner.
But even if you are the queen of masturbatory techniques, you might still find it tough to climax during full sex, and this will almost certainly be because your clitoris is not getting sufficient attention.
So here are four sex positions that might help you to enjoy intercourse more – and to have fulfilling orgasms at the same time.
(This stands for coital adjusted technique, but don't let that rather technical and boring title put you off!)
Basically, this is a face-to-face position, but the man or penis-haver rides much higher than they would in the missionary position so that their shoulders and head are about six inches higher up the bed than normal.
What this means is that their penis doesn't go all the way into the vagina. Instead, the stem or root of it is pulled hard against the clitoris – producing great sensations in that all-important little organ.
The other difference is that instead of taking his weight on his elbows, they should simply let their bulk rest on your upper chest.Clearly, if they're heavy, this might be a problem.
You can experiment with this position to get it absolutely right for you. Some people do it with the man's legs outside, but you can also try it with their legs inside yours.Many couples find they can't thrust much in this position so they kind of 'rock' together.
The CAT certainly produces very different sensations from many other positions, so it's worth a try, and it might just take you to the heights of ecstasy. I hope it does.
The man or penis-haver lies down on their back. You face the other way and sits down on their penis. Then, in your own time, you gradually lowers yourself so that – with their penis inside you – your back is lying fully outstretched on the front of their body.
You can feel genuinely weightless and free-as-air – which is quite a novel sensation. Another bonus is that either partner can touch the clitoris easily. So it's different and fun – and usually a great time is had by all.
You lie flat on your front and they lie, face down, on top of you. They then penetrate you from behind.
But because you are flat on the bed, you get very different sensations from any rear-entry position where your bottom is up in the air. And you can slip your hand in between the bed and your body and rub your own clitoris.
Plenty of women who have never 'come' during intercourse have found that they climaxed in the Pinner position.
This is the position where you lie on your side and your partner lies curled up round your bottom (like spoons in a drawer) and penetrates you from behind.
Lots of women like this, though not all of them find it easy to orgasm on their sides. But the great advantage here is that either partner can reach down and rub your clitoris. Also, neither of you is having to take the weight of the other.
Start with a classic missionary face to face position, (lie on your back, have your legs apart, knees up, and feet planted) but place a wedge or cushion underneath the bottom of your your back, which will help elevate your pelvis and switch-up the position of the penis when it enters you.
Have the penis owner adjust the position, frequently varying the angle in which he penetrates you, with varying speed. This will help you explore different areas of your vagina, and get to know what you like.
Feel free to move your pelvis in penetration, to direct the penis (hence, your feet need to be planted to support you), and make sure you breathe, which will enhance sensation. Your partner can either kneel, or try stretching his legs out, for more weight on your vulva.
Another way you can adjust missionary is to 'close your legs so that it’s a tighter squeeze,' suggests sex expert Rebecca Dakin . 'You can even cross them for more tightness. The thrusting then will be more likely to stimulate the clitoris as it’s a more of a targeted approach.'
Yep. 80% of vulva owners require clitoral stimulation to achieve orgasm, and while toys are brilliant for this, there are ways you can get your partner to stimulate your clitoris with their penis. 'Every now and then get him [the penis owner] to slide out and slide their penis over the top of your clitoral hood, before slipping it slowly back in,' suggests Dakin.
There's no right or wrong way to have sex with a partner. Every couple has to experiment to find out what works for them.
But I hope that trying out these positions will be fun – and that they may help you to have an exciting and orgasmic time.
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What Does an Orgasm Feel Like? 17 Women Get Real About Orgasms
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If you ask 17 women "What does an orgasm feel like?" you'll get 17 slightly different answers. Just like every body is different, every orgasm is different, but they all have one thing in common: They feel good. Whether from partnered sex or masturbation, there are few things that hit the spot as much as achieving orgasm .
"The brain and central nervous system are responsible for sexual responses like orgasm,” says Heather Corinna, author of S.E.X.: The All-You-Need-To-Know Progressive Sexuality Guide to Get You Through High School and College and founder of sex education site Scarleteen . “During sexual pleasure, all the nerve endings of your body (including your genitals, all linked to your nervous system) are in concert and communication with your brain, and vice-versa.”
The way orgasms feel varies from person to person. Here, we asked 17 women what an orgasm feels like and here's what they had to say.
“Screaming for joy. Feeling everything and nothing at the same time.”
“Like tangling up a bunch of Christmas lights inside you and then blowing a fuse.”
“The stars emoji mixed with the explosion emoji.”
“I think the best thing about an orgasm is that you can't really be thinking about anything else besides your own pleasure. It's all-consuming and euphoric.”
“In romantic terms: Uninhibited release of control, of self-consciousness, of everything.”
“If you were to ask me to physically describe the feeling: It's like a really wonderful and powerful sneeze in your vagina. The kind of sneeze that you can sense building up for a while, and then it happens and is just the most satisfying sneeze and you hope you have to sneeze again.”
“You know when Sailor Moon floats up into the air as a beam of light shines through her body and she transforms into a superhero? That.”
“The feeling is the same level of happiness as when you're sprawled out on a lounge chair on a tropical beach, and unironically order a [non-alcoholic] strawberry daiquiri because you are unstoppable.”
“An orgasm feels like electric dominoes are falling down in different directions under your skin.”
“It's a buildup of tension that arches your back and curls your toes, almost like a clenching feeling. And just when you think you can't take it anymore, suddenly all that tension is released and pulses throughout your body. It's the best relief.”
“Like a real moment in the day that's just for you (and maybe your partner too, if you have one). It doesn't work if you're distracted, at least not for me.”
“When it's really good it's like an out-of-body experience, like I can feel my clitoris on a roller-coaster ride but my soul and mind are on a whole other level of connection with myself or the person I'm with and it takes over my body. Usually it leaves my whole body shaking and I can't stand up for a few minutes.”
“It's similar to your body falling off a cliff into a pile of tingling ecstasy. It's a sense of sensual release that you find yourself having no control over and letting yourself go because it's just too damn good. An earth-shattering female orgasm is one of a kind.”
“Like a hard candy and you suck on it and then all of a sudden you get to the center and it's the burst of flavor.”
“The relief of walking up the stairs to your fifth-floor walk-up into your air-conditioned apartment.”
“Like melting chocolate in the microwave.”
“Remember the first time you tried an avocado or ate avocado toast? That feeling of bliss and taste of deliciousness? That's what an orgasm feels like.”
Studies suggest that orgasms can actually benefit your health. Orgasms trigger the release of dopamine, endorphins, and oxytocin , which, in addition to making you feel amazing, have also been shown to lower blood pressure . Women who masturbate to orgasm also report having higher self-esteem than women who don't, leading to better overall mental health. Orgasms have even been shown to have positive effects on the gut health , improving digestion, decreasing bloating and ameliorating the negative effects of anxiety and depression.
Over half of American adults say they masturbate one to four times a week, according to the National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior , making it an easy and popular way to reap the health benefits of regular orgasm. Another huge benefit? Better sleep.
“For people having difficulty sleeping, it helps them sleep,” said Dr. Jennifer Berman , urologist and sexual health expert. “It can help to limit stress and tension. It can help to relieve pain in the body. It can even relieve menstrual cramps."
The best thing about getting to know your body and your sexuality is that you don’t need a partner to reap the benefits of orgasms.
Shailene Woodley said it best when she talked about the importance of young women learning about masturbation. “As a young woman you don’t learn how to pleasure yourself, you don’t learn what an orgasm should be, you don’t learn that you should have feelings of satisfaction. I’ve always had a dream of making a book called There’s No Right Way to Masturbate ," she said .
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This content is imported from Giphy. You may be able to find the same content in another format, or you may be able to find more information, at their web site.
This content is imported from Giphy. You may be able to find the same content in another format, or you may be able to find more information, at their web site.
Gigi Engle
Gigi Engle is a writer, certified sexologist, sex coach, and sex educator.
This content is created and maintained by a third party, and imported onto this page to help users provide their email addresses. You may be able to find more information about this and similar content at piano.io
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"I orgasmed at a Grateful Dead concert."
Orgasms can be pretty hard to come by (pun intended) for many women. So when reports about someone accidentally climaxing during an abs workout or even while peeing start to surface — it can prompt some some major question marks.
But accidental orgasms are totally a thing. And they happen way more than you probably realize. Take it from these nine women who experienced the pleasure shock first hand (or, well, via other miscellaneous objects). Prepare to be amazed.
"One time, I was laying alone in the leaves under a really tall tree while raindrops were hitting my face. I don’t know what came over me but I suddenly felt a super-intense connection with the nature around me and realized I was legit orgasming. It was the coolest thing that's ever happened to me." — Ella, 24
"I was grinding against my boyfriend’s leg in high school and wound up coming all over his leg. I even got his jeans wet." — Grace*, 27
"I’m a 43-year-old mother of three who found out that labor and [vaginal] delivery makes for a very memorable orgasm. It’s called ecstatic birth and it’s a little-known ancient secret in our society." — Marev, 43
"I discovered orgasm while jogging for the first time at the age of 15. Something about rubbing legs together. Then it happened again while doing jumping jacks at a dance class and once it happened while dancing jive at a ballroom dance party!" —Celeste*, 37
"I am really into massages. Long story short, halfway through any massage, I have an orgasm. I try to relax and think about something else, but once that feeling is coming over me it feels like there is no way to stop it." — forgedinhades , Reddit
"[I orgasmed] at a Grateful Dead concert. The combination of the music and vibe and various substances in the air, combined with my dancing and swaying just suddenly did it for me. It was surprising, amazing, and, most importantly, made me realize at a young age that orgasm could happen outside traditional sexual experiences." — Jenn, 47
"I hopped in the shower in preparation for an awesome double-date night. In anticipation of some possible sexy times, I began the process of achieving silky-smooth legs. I finish with the right, after some careful balancing and maneuvering, and begin to move on to the left. I shift around, testing different positions for best access. Finally, after a good two minutes of moving around, I find the prime stance. And it just so happened to be the stance where the water was being launched straight at my crotch. And so the battle began.
"It became a race between my shaving abilities and my orgasm control. Much to the amusement of my girlfriend, I lack willpower when it comes to the second. I get halfway through shaving the lower half of my leg when I know exactly what's about to go down: me. I lost my balance, began to slip, and in my pathetic throws of shower head violation-induced passion, ended up smacking my head into the wall. So now, here I sit, a bag of frozen veggies soothing the lump on my head, and half of a fuzzy leg." — creepycreepercreepin , Reddit
"I discovered the wonderful and beautiful showerhead in my bathroom one day while taking a bath. It was this warm, amazing feeling down below. Then, well, it was fireworks. I felt like I was doing something bad, but I guess I didn’t care because I took a LOT of baths after that." — Mia, 31
"I once had the most powerful orgasm you can possibly imagine in my sleep. I woke up drenched in sweat. I had to jump in the shower. It was insanely intense. I’ll never forget it." — Brea, 27
Gigi Engle is a sex educator and writer living in Chicago. Follow her on Instagram and Twitter at @GigiEngle.
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