Sex Standing

Sex Standing
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Zachary Zane is a Brooklyn-based writer, speaker, and activist whose work focuses on lifestyle, sexuality, culture, and entertainment.

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Sometimes there's simply no time to find a bed.
If Netflix's erotic series Sex/Life taught us anything, it's that you can have sex pretty much anywhere. But when you're having sex outside the bedroom, you need to get creative. Tried and true positions like missionary and doggy style aren't always feasible when you don't have a bed. That's where standing sex positions can come into play: They're helpful for when you're in the mood for a quickie or doing it against the counter, on the couch, or wherever you and your partner desperately need to get it on. Not to mention that standing sex is straight-up hot. There's something about doing it upright that's weirdly primal.
“If both people are standing and have proper support, standing sex can be incredibly pleasurable both because of the biomechanics and positioning and also because of the way it looks,” explains Kenneth Play , international sex educator and sex hacker. Pop culture depictions of standing sex have made it seem like it's all about in-and-out thrusting, but that's far from the truth. It's not just about pounding your partner as hard as possible with the additional leverage (and momentum) you get from standing up; it's about hitting different angles and tweaking positions that allow for deeper penetration and pleasure.
However, there is one drawback that makes standing sex positions a little trickier: height differences. “Whether or not this experience works for you depends a lot on both people’s height and size,” Play says. “For some, it might facilitate angles that feel better than usual, while for others it’s just awkward.”
So, if you notice that a position on this list isn’t working for you because of height (or strength), go ahead and skip it. We assembled a range of positions, at least some of which will work for you! So get up off the bed, stand tall, and start getting to business.
How to do it: The bottom (receiver) should lie on the edge of the bed. The top (penetrator) then positions themselves in front of the bottom, placing their legs over their shoulders.
Benefits: This position allows for deep penetration and the ability to manually stimulate your partner's clitoris during penetration.
How to do it: One partner stands upright with their hands tied up above them. The second partner gets down on their knees and orally stimulates their partner, with one leg draped around their shoulder.
Benefits: If the receiver has a vulva, this position is great for manual and oral stimulation (so both fingering and sucking on your partner's clitoris). If the receiver has a penis, well then, they're just getting a sexy blowjob with their hands tied behind their head!
How to do it: This one requires a bit of quad and glute strength. The top picks up the bottom and then grabs the bottom by their booty to penetrate while standing up .
Benefits: This is one of those positions that's hot simply because you can pull it off. It also allows for great eye contact and deep penetration.
How to do it: The bottom should lie on their back with their legs raised over their head. The top then squats over the bottom and dips their penis in and out of them.
You should be careful in all sex positions, but particularly in this one because the bottom can strain their neck in the Butter Churner.
Benefits: This position allows for very deep penetration too.
How to do it: Facing one another, the bottom simply raises one of their legs and wraps it around the top's buttocks or thighs. The bottom pulls the top into them using their leg.
Benefits: This is a great option for quickies in small spaces and outdoor sex. Also, it's a great position for making out.
How to do it: The bottom should prop themselves up on a desk, kitchen counter, laundry machine, etc. They then wrap their legs around the top's butt.
Benefits: It's a great sex position for a quickie with deep penetration.
How to do it: Sex in the pool? Not super advisable . But sex with the receiving partner sitting on the edge of the pool (or hot tub)? Hot. In this position, the receiver simply wraps their legs around the giver.
Benefits: This is great for a little outdoor quickie, if you feel like getting ~back to nature~.
How to do it: The bottom lies down on their hands and knees and the top lifts up their behind. The bottom then wraps their legs around the top's butt.
Benefits: This is another fantastic position for deep penetration. The top can grab the bottom by their hips and forcefully thrust with the Standing Wheelbarrow.
How to do it: In this variation of doggy style, the bottom moves to the end of the bed. The top stands behind their partner while penetrating from behind.
Benefits : Some people find this position more comfortable than regular doggy style.
How to do it: The bottom props themselves on a kitchen counter or bathroom sink. The top penetrates from behind.
Benefits: Doing it in front of the bathroom mirror will tap into your voyeuristic side . It's also a fantastic position for anal sex .
How to do it: The bottom lays down over a couch, with their hips on the armrest; the top penetrates from behind.
Benefits: With the bottom's behind raised by the couch's armrest, their butt is naturally tilted upward, allowing for deeper penetration. It's like using a sex pillow or another piece of sex furniture , except you don't have to buy anything.
How to do it: The bottom bends over as if they are trying to touch their toes. The top then grabs the bottom by the waist and thrusts.
Benefits: There's great thrusting power from this position. It's also incredibly hot for quickie sex—the giver can easily lift up their partner's skirt and go to town.
How to do it: This oral sex position really needs no explanation. The bottom drops to their knees and goes down on their partner.
Benefits: If you're on the receiving end, there's something hot about having your partner look up at you as you get blown!

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It's a challenge you can absolutely master.
Standing sex is a little like wasabi: Amazing when used sparingly for a lil spice but maybe not really a main course kind of deal.
“First of all, it is nothing like it is in the movies,” says Nadia Charif, RD, a wellness coach and health advisor at Coffeeble . “Standing up with another body hitched to you is hard work. And that’s coming from the one being lifted. Clinging on for dear life with your ankles, knees, hips and arms take its toll very quickly.”
But when it's good, it's so very very good. “Standing sex is perfect for when you’re busy and want a quickie or simply need to squeeze in a small space,” says Jessica O'Reilly, global ambassador for We-Vibe , Arcwave and Womanizer .
Standing sex is great for I MUST HAVE YOU NOW quickies (or, if slow sex is your thing, lie down and try these way to have slow super intense sex ). It's also great when you are looking for a new position to try (like Standing 69 if you're feeling ambitious and strong).
The way to make standing sex work is to decide that it's whatever it is you want it to be. “To have fun while doing it, don’t get hung up on penetration; you can play with a variety of sex acts while standing,” says O'Reilly.
“Before you consider any vertical shenanigans, consider if the dominant partner is in reasonable shape and they are able to support your weight somewhat for at least a minute. Once you have established this sturdy ‘base,’ you can experiment,” says Charif.
If no one's up for full-on lifting, go ahead and try a modified standing situation like standing oral where, while standing, you masturbating or use toys on each other. Another option: Just lie down and do whatever the F you want. “Remember that sex isn’t an Olympic sport—whether it be oral, masturbation or penetrative—so don’t put to much pressure on yourself and your partner. Just have fun and listen to your body,” says Todd Baratz, brand wellness expert for Pjur .
“Use a step to get a little extra height or even use a desk or kitchen bench if you need an extra boost. The more aligned your pelvis is with your partner's, the better,” says Emma Hewitt, sex educator, writer, and host and producer of sex-positive podcast The Electric Rodeo . “You can also try standing on something that makes you taller, like a step or milk crate. You can even wear some high heels if you have no trouble standing up while using them,” adds Dainis Graveris, certified sex educator at relationship expert at SexualAlpha .
“It helps to get creative. Most folks imagine standing sex positions as just a few things, but standing sex positions a) don't have to involve both/multiple parties standing, and b) don't have to be penetrative,” says Laura Borichevsky, sex educator and founder of Sex Outside . “This leaves open a lot of room to explore various positions where oral sex is involved, and also broadens the definition to be inclusive of folks for whom standing during sex may not be accessible, but for the partner(s) it might be.”
“Pointing your toes or standing on your tiptoes tightens the pelvic floor. For the receiving partner, it contracts the vaginal and anal muscles for a stronger grip feeling for the inserting partner. For the person doing the thrusting, pointing your toes can add inches to your insertion and give you a stronger stroke,” says Goody Howard, sex educator for sexual hygiene and body care company Royal .
“Lube is one of the most important sexual health products out there. We don’t always think of it as being an assistant to what we want to accomplish, but it totally is,” says Rachel Wright , sexual wellness expert for We-Vibe . “Lube will help the gliding in any position, especially when the angle is a little wonky, like when you’re standing.”
“When it comes to strap-on sex, the size and density of the dildo can make a big difference, regardless of your standing position,” says Sarah Riccio, queer sex educator and co-founder of Delicto . “In my experience, dual-density dildos are ideal because their firm core keeps them erect, while their squishy exterior gives me room to play. Additionally, dildos longer than 5 inches allow a little extra wiggle room when it’s time to comfortably switch positions.”
“Invest in a ‘ doggie style strap ’—aka bondage gear that is essentially a pad that has two straps on each side. The straps essentially replace the need to hold on to the person’s hips and it definitely helps ease pressure on the lower back and hips and love handles,” says Wright. “This gear also allows for deeper penetration!”
“Particularly for shower or outdoor sex, it can be helpful to hike a foot up on an elevation, or bend over and lean against something standing (like a wall, tree, fence, etc.) to give your partner an excellent angle from behind and lots of comfort and mobility to move,” says sex coach Cara Kovacs .
If you want something to stick in the shower, try a suction foot rest . Prop your foot up on it with its sturdy and waterproof design for deeper levels of penetration.
“If you are facing each other, tell your partner to lean against a wall and wrap your leg around their waist (or vice versa). It will give you maximal capability to kiss and caress, while using the elevated leg to make the actual mobility of insertion comfortable and attainable,” says Kovacs.
Penetrative sex is fun obvi, but sometimes it just…doesn’t work. If it feels difficult or uncomfortable, standing oral is an absolute fabulous alternative, recommends Kovacs.
“If you prefer face-to-face positioning, a desk, table, or countertop can be handy,” recommends sex therapist Stefani Goerlich . “Have the receiving partner place their booty on the edge of something and spread their legs. The penetrating partner can then stand between their legs and enter them with lots of opportunity for kissing.”
“The best way to have standing sex is to have help taking some of the weight from both of you (so you can actually relax enough to enjoy it),” says Miyoko Rifkin , former Playboy TV and radio host. Try a wearable harness that supports the weight of another person. Use it face-to-face for a more intimate connection, or standing doggy-style for deeper penetration.
If your lover has back problems, try a door sex swing set like the one below—it will ease the weight even more than just a normal sex swing.
Buy Now Bondage Boutique Door Sex Swing, $40, lovehoney.com
“It can be hard to achieve orgasm while standing up—especially if you are accustomed to having sex while lying down. Don’t be afraid to start in a standing position, but finish in another fave one,” says Good Vibrations sexologist Carol Queen .
“Before the pandemic and everyone’s social life went on lockdown, I loved a good bathroom hook-up,” says Ryn Pfeuffer, sex and relationships writer and author of 101 Ways to Rock Online Dating . “Whether it happened with a known partner at home while we got ready to go out, or at a dive bar during karaoke with a stranger I’d just met, there’s something sexy AF about leaning over a bathroom sink, widening your stance, and watching a hand or penis fuck you in a mirror.
The person can grab your hips, smack your ass, or reach around for your tits. If you plan to give this position a whirl in a public bathroom, remember to keep it quick, quiet, and as discreet as possible.”
"This position can be fun in the context of role playing—think cop and perpetrator play,” says Lori Lawrenz, PhD, a clinical psychologist specializing in sexual health at the Hawaii Center for Sexual and Relationship Health . “The 'frisking' partner can enter from behind via penetrative acts. The partner being frisked can receive touching and pleasure. Blindfolds can also be used in the frisk position.” F the police, indeed.
“This can be girl-on-girl, or boy-on-girl, boy-on-boy, everyone is welcome!” says Charif. “One partner stands and leans back and relaxes against the wall while the other kneels to provide the titillating experience. It can be hot and steamy in the shower cubicle, building up anticipation on the corridor to the bedroom, or releasing the horn in the hallway after falling through the front door.”
Not quite the spontaneous up-against-the-wall-have-me-right-now now vibe that makes standing sex so sexy, but if you're willing to take a few moments to arrange yourselves, this will give you deep penetration and perfect internal stimulation. Lean back against the door frame for stamina/leverage and you'll have your hands free to roam.
Perch your ass on the very edge of a counter or dresser top. He stands to enter but instead of him thrusting like the normals do, put your feet into his hands and have him rock you back and forth over his peen. New sensations plus super yummy directed focus on the top wall of your V.
You know that sex-looking “hike” part of the a football game? Borrow the stance and lean over, bending your knees. Touch the ground or brace your hands on your knees. He enters, standing from behind, entering a hole of y'all's choice. Further the football metaphor with some adept ball handling—just reach back and gently cup and stroke his balls.
If you're feeling a little bondagey, which is not a word but totally a real thing, invest in a pair of over-the-door restraints. Your hands are bound above your head while your partner kneels on the ground before you, leaving you helpless to do anything but succumb to the very good things they are doing with their mouth. (If you're not trying to go all out, this still works if you just hold on to the doorknob.)
If you're athletic, unduly risky and a bit extra, have your dude stand up with his legs bent and feet slightly apart to brace himself. He lifts you (jump a little to give him a break) til you're penis-height and impaled thereon. Bend your legs and wrap your feet back around his bum. He wraps his arms around your waist, you lock your arms back through his. Try not to die. (For a wimpier version: do the same thing but stand next to a sturdy counter and rest your hands on it.)

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