Sex Sin I
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Sex Sin I
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The Washington Times had an article which said that President Clinton and Monica Lewinsky had phone sex and oral sex. It also said he researched the Bible and concluded that oral sex does not constitute adultery. Aren't phone sex, oral sex, and masturbation wrong?
Straight Answers has received several questions from readers regarding President
Clinton's romantic escapades reported in the media. While commenting on
our President's alleged behavior is beyond the purview of this column, the
moral issues warrant discussion.
Before addressing these particular actions, we must first have a clear
understanding of the Catholic Church's teaching regarding the sexual expression
of love. The Catholic Church continues to teach that sexual love between
a man and woman is both sacred and good, but is reserved to marriage.
This teaching is rooted in the creation account of Genesis Book
1, Chapter 1 of Sacred are: First, God creates man in His own image and
likeness, making them male and female (Gen 1:27). Each person therefore
has an inherent dignity. In the next verse, the Bible reads, "God blessed
them, saying, 'Be fertile and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it'
" (Gen 1:28). Before the man and woman come together as husband and wife,
and before they express their love as husband and wife, they are first
blessed by God.
Only in marriage do we find God's blessing upon the act of sexual love,
or what is better termed marital love. This physical expression of love
in marriage is a sacred sign of a husband and wife's covenant of life
and love that they share in union with God. This marital love signifies
the vows freely exchanged between each other and thereby reflects the
faithful, permanent, exclusive, end self-giving love they have promised
to each other and to God.
This understanding is evident in Jesus' response to the Pharisees' question
regarding divorce: "Have you not read that at the beginning the Creator
made them male and female end declared, 'For this reason a man shall leave
his father and mother and cling to his wife, and the two shall become
as one? Thus they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore let no man
separate what God has joined" (Mt 19:46). Through the Sacrament of Holy
Matrimony, God blesses the couple joined in this sacred bond and generously
bestows grace so that they may assume the duties of marriage in mutual
and lasting fidelity.
Moreover, the marital love of husband and wife which unites them as "one
flesh" may overflow and participate in God's creative love: a child may
be born from their love. Then, again, God gives abundant graces so that
the husband and wife can fulfill their duties as father and mother. Therefore,
in accord with God's design, sexual love is reserved to marriage and must
always preserve both the unitive and procreative dimensions. Any action
which deviates from this design is intrinsically evil. Here is the clear
teaching of Sacred Scripture and the consistent teaching of our Church
To violate the covenant love of marriage, whether physically or spiritually,
whether by one's self or with another, constitutes adultery. Recall the
teaching of our Lord: "You have heard the commandment, 'You shall not
commit adultery.' What I say to you m; anyone who looks lustfully at a
woman has already committed adultery with her in his heart" (Mt 5:2728).
Our Lord elevated the living of that faithful, permanent, exclusive, and
self-giving love of marriage, to a higher standard of holiness.
With foundation, we can now address the issues at hand: phone sex, oral
sex, and masturbation. While I am not sure exactly what "phone sex" is,
clearly it is inseparable from the vice of lust. Lust is simply defined
as an inordinate desire for sexual pleasure. Such pleasure is considered
disordered when sought after itself and removed from the unitive and procreative
dimensions of marriage. One could consider "phone sex" a kind of pornography
whereby the activity good to marriage is removed and used to stimulate
an individual. Hence, the individual withdraws from reality and becomes
absorbed in a fantasy world. Such activity is pursued for selfish pleasure
alone. In all, this "phone sex" or any pornography perverts the goodness
of the act of marriage and thereby entails mortal sin.
The usage and enjoyment of pornographic stimuli is linked with the act
of masturbation, "the deliberate stimulation of the genital organs in
order to derive sexual pleasure" (Catechism, No. 2352). The Church has
consistently taught that masturbation is an intrinsically and gravely
disordered action. Even in the Book of Genesis, we find a condemnation
of masturbation in the story of Onan, "who wasted his seed on the ground,"
an act which greatly offended God (Gen 38:8-11); from this story arises
the word onaism, a synonym for masturbation. Here we find a solitary action
which arises from withdrawal into a fantasy world, is performed for selfish
pleasure, and perverts the self-giving act of love between husband and
wife.
Objectively, masturbation entails mortal sin. However, the Catechism
cautions, "To form an equitable judgment about the subjects' moral responsibility
and to guide pastoral action, one must take into account the affective
immaturity, force of acquired habit, conditions of anxiety, or other psychological
or social factors that lessen or even extenuate moral culpability" (Catechism,
No. 2352).
Finally, oral sex involves the ejaculation of a man into the mouth of
another male or female. In legal terms, oral sex is called sodomy. An
old classic text, Handbook of Moral Theology, reads, "Sodomy is a sin
which cries to heaven for vengeance." Here we clearly see the perversion
of the marital act and an intrinsically evil action which entails mortal
sin.
Each of these actions violates the Christian understanding of the Sixth
Commandment, "Thou shalt not commit adultery. " In all, we must remember
that each of us is called to live by the virtue of chastity. As defined
in the Catechism, "Chastity means the successful integration of sexuality
within the person and thus tile inner unity of man in his bodily and spiritual
being" (No. 2337). Chastity enables us to respect the dignity of our human
sexuality and the sacredness of marital love. Chastity moves us to look
upon each person as a person, not as a body, and to respect their inherent
dignity. In chastity, a person strives for mastery over feelings and passions,
respects the sacredness of mental love, and takes responsibility for his
actions.
Of course we need God's grace and the assistance of the Holy Spirit to
live a chaste life, especially in a culture that abounds with great temptation.
We must never forget that one of the fruits of the Holy Spirit is chastity
(Gal 5;23). With all the media attention recently, we find the urgent
need to teach about chastity, even to Bible reading Christians.
Saunders, Rev. William. "Clinton and Lewinsky." Arlington Catholic
Herald .
This article is reprinted with permission from Arlington Catholic
Herald .
Father William Saunders is pastor of Our Lady of Hope parish in Potomac Falls, Virginia. He is dean of the Notre Dame Graduate School of Christendom College. The above article is a "Straight Answers" column he wrote for the Arlington Catholic Herald . Father Saunders is the author of Straight Answers , a book based on 100 of his columns, and Straight Answers II .
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Jon Bloom serves as teacher and cofounder of Desiring God. He is author of three books, Not by Sight , Things Not Seen , and Don’t Follow Your Heart . He and his wife have five children and make their home in the Twin Cities.
Jon Bloom serves as teacher and cofounder of Desiring God. He is author of three books, Not by Sight , Things Not Seen , and Don’t Follow Your Heart . He and his wife have five children and make their home in the Twin Cities.
In 1 Peter 3:19, we read that Christ “went and proclaimed to the spirits in prison, because they formerly did not obey.” What might Peter mean?
As we seek to resist the gravitational pull our phones exert, we might find help from an ancient Israelite practice: Sabbath.
Questions and answers with John Piper
Interactive Bible study with John Piper
Questions and answers with John Piper
Interactive Bible study with John Piper
Most people in the world have no experience of lasting joy in their lives. We’re on a mission to change that. All of our resources exist to guide you toward everlasting joy in Jesus Christ.
The most powerful weapon against sexual impurity is humility. Patterns of sinful thought and behavior are fruits of a deeper root. If we want to stop bearing bad fruit, we must aim our primary attack against the root. And the root of sexual sin is not our sex drive; it’s pride.
We live in an age dominated by Darwinian explanations of biology and psychology. So we easily absorb certain naturalistic assumptions. One such assumption is that our sexual drives and impulses are remnants of our primordial, bestial ancestors, and therefore we deal with them with cages of external personal and social restraints.
This is a very conflicted perspective. It views us as both victims and monsters. On one hand, we’re victims of our ancient past, and on the other hand, we’re sexual monsters if we express our primal impulses in ways not sanctioned by the prevailing level of social tolerance.
It’s also a wholly inadequate explanation in view of our consuming sexual problem. The degrees of human sexual depravity, distortion, and destruction are of such a nature that nearly everyone thinks things and many do things that we have no other word for than evil .
It’s shocking how little our inner evil bestial impulses have to do with our primal genetic intent: procreation. No other human instinct has so many deviations in its expressions. Our culture can’t keep up with the expanding sexual definitions. LGBTQ is now just shorthand for LGBTTQQIAAPPK (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, transsexual, queer, questioning, intersex, asexual, ally, pansexual, polygamous, kinkiness). And this is likely obsolete already. It’s getting tragically ridiculous.
But since Darwinism denies any basis for assigning moral value to anything, we can’t term something a “perversion,” because this word has moral connotations. So we’re trying to solve the problem of human sexual perversion by eliminating the concept of sexual perversion. But this can’t scale to embrace all sexual expressions without destroying people and society.
And it won’t work, because the root problem isn’t actually a sexual one.
What does the Bible diagnose as the root of human sexual perversion — what we often and rightly call sexual brokenness? We can see it clearly in Romans 1:21–26 ,
For although they knew God, they did not honor him as God or give thanks to him, but they became futile in their thinking, and their foolish hearts were darkened. Claiming to be wise, they became fools, and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images resembling mortal man and birds and animals and creeping things. Therefore God gave them up in the lusts of their hearts to impurity, to the dishonoring of their bodies among themselves, because they exchanged the truth about God for a lie and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever! Amen. For this reason God gave them up to dishonorable passions.
“Dishonorable passions,” which refers to sexual sin in all its deviant heterosexual, homosexual, and other expressions, is a manifestation of humanity unhinged from its Creator. The real root of perversion, of which the dishonorable passions of sexual perversions is just one fruit, is human pride.
Pride is a black hole of consuming selfishness at the core of fallen human nature. Pride’s nature is to consume, to bring into the self. It sees other people, all of creation, and God himself as things to use in service to the self’s desires.
We all know this by experience. We know the more we feed any expression of pride, whether through sex or anger or covetousness or whatever, pride’s appetite grows and urges us to consume more and more.
So just as gluttony or anorexia is pride infecting and manipulating the self’s orientation toward food, or greed is pride infecting and manipulating the self’s orientation toward money, sexual immorality and perversions are pride infecting and manipulating the self’s orientation toward sex. Sexual sin is unhinged human pride rejecting the Creator in order to sexually consume others for the benefit of the self.
This does not mean, however, that there’s an exact correlation between the nature of our particular sexual brokenness and our personal rebellion against God. We are all born with natures in rebellion against God. But our individual sexuality is shaped by a host of biological, personal, family, and social/cultural influences. Some factors we’re born with, some may have been abusively forced upon us, and some we sinfully embrace and nourish. The Bible acknowledges all these factors.
But when Paul says God gives up a people “in the lusts of their hearts to impurity,” he’s mainly (though not exclusively) referring to a corporate judgment. The more a people unhinge themselves from God’s ordained limits, the more God removes the restraints on the sexual expressions of pride, resulting in a societal slide into consuming sexual destruction.
So we must keep in mind that, no matter what sexual orientation or dysfunction or distortion we’re dealing with, our biggest personal and corporate problem is not sexual; it’s pride.
Our most powerful weapon in the fight against sexual impurity is not a cage to hem in our depraved impulses, nor is it increased tolerance of sexual deviancy, but a profound humility. And humility is a deep realization and embrace of the truth that we are not our own. This is why Paul gave the Corinthians this counsel regarding sexual sin:
Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body. ( 1 Corinthians 6:18–20 )
Yes, fleeing from an enticing sexual temptation — taking behavioral action — is necessary. But notice that Paul’s primary emphasis is not behavior modification, nor is it deliverance from demonic oppression, both of which are realities of our complex human experience and so have some place in our fight for sexual purity. Paul sees the primary issue in our sexual struggle as the remaining pride within us.
That’s why the key to our freedom, the great killer of our sexual sin, is in our embracing this reality:
I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. ( Galatians 2:20 )
This is what it means that we are not our own. This is what sin-killing humility looks like. This is the death of pride and all its perverting power over us.
Freedom is not the freedom to express our pride-fueled sexual desires. Freedom is the humble belief that we are not our own, and therefore not enslaved to our all-consuming pride, but free to be what God created us to be.
Sam Allberry is a pastor, apologist, and speaker. He is the author of Why Does God Care Who I Sleep With?
Sam Allberry is a pastor, apologist, and speaker. He is the author of Why Does God Care Who I Sleep With?
In 1 Peter 3:19, we read that Christ “went and proclaimed to the spirits in prison, because they formerly did not obey.” What might Peter mean?
As we seek to resist the gravitational pull our phones exert, we might find help from an ancient Israelite practice: Sabbath.
Questions and answers with John Piper
Interactive Bible study with John Piper
Questions and answers with John Piper
Interactive Bible study with John Piper
Most people in the world have no experience of lasting joy in their lives. We’re on a mission to change that. All of our resources exist to guide you toward everlasting joy in Jesus Christ.
Sexual sin goes against who God created humans to be. The Bible teaches us this lesson in Proverbs 5 as the sage warns a young married man against the adulteress.
You may not be young, or married, or a man, but the wisdom of this text applies to you as much as to anyone else. Committing adultery with a woman is not the only form of sexual sin, but it follows a pattern that is common to all. Listening to this passage will help all of us. As the passage unfolds, it presents to us four steps we’ll need to take to avoid sexual sin.
The author begins with an exhortation to listen:
My son, be attentive to my wisdom; incline your ear to my understanding that you may keep discretion, and your lips may guard knowledge. For the lips of a forbidden woman drip honey, and her speech is smoother than oil. ( Proverbs 5:1–3 )
Sexual sin is often attractive. It has a certain charm that invites and allures with seductive and smooth speech. It is also addictive: “The iniquities of the wicked ensnare him, and he is held fast in the cords of his sin” ( Proverbs 5:22 ). Like any appetite, the more we feed sexual sin the more it grows. The more we commit it, the more we will feel we need it, the easier it will be to do it, and the harder it will become to stop.
Now, O sons, listen to me, and do not depart from the words of my mouth. Keep your way far from her, and do not go near the door of her house. ( Proverbs 5:7–8 )
Fleeing sexual sin means doing all we can to avoid it. For some of us, that will mean restricting what we look at online, or not watching certain TV shows, or being more careful about what social situations we place ourselves in, or breaking up with someone (even if they mean the world to us), or changing our job.
If any of this seems like an overreaction, listen again to how it all ends: “He dies for lack of discipline, and because of his great folly he is led astray” ( Proverbs 5:23 ). Sexual sin is attractive and addictive, and this is a lethal combination. Any action and sacrifice is worth it.
The writer wants us to see what it all comes to in the end : “At the end of your life you groan,
when your flesh and body are consumed” ( Proverbs 5:11 ). Sexual sin has consequences. We may
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