Sex Outdoor Young Girls
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By Chloe Castleberry For Dailymail.com 17:39 BST 30 Jan 2018 , updated 05:00 BST 31 Jan 2018
No one forgets their first time having sex, even if it was an awkward or unfulfilling experience.
And in an attempt to shed light on the vast first time sexual encounters girls can have, a group of young women spoke to Seventeen about losing their virginity, and how the experience felt.
Their first time confessions describe where and when they had sex, with who and how they felt afterward.
Hafeezah expected her first time to be magical and told Seventeen that it would have been more enjoyable if the guy involved was more considerate.
She said: 'He knew I was a virgin and for some reason, I had this expectation of it being magical, which in all honesty, it wasn't.
'He kept his face buried in my shoulder/neck the whole time and asked if I was okay once during, which I thought was kind of inconsiderate.'
'I think I would have enjoyed it more if he had checked in with me to see if my needs were being met, which they weren't. At the time, I was blinded by my love, so I chose to look past that.'
For other girls like Katie, their first time was shared with someone who cared about how they were feeling.
'He told me to relax and that we didn't have to continue if I didn't want to, but I did. I felt a little ashamed and embarrassed because I imagined something different and I thought he was disappointed in the experience.'
'He was so understanding and he said it was fine and that he wanted me to be okay, and that we didn't have to continue. He made me feel better about the experience, and we are still together two and a half years later.'
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For Tori, her first time was with someone she was 'crazy about' and happened when knew she was ready.
She said: 'I was almost 21, I was (finally) in a relationship with a guy I was crazy about, and I knew I was as ready as I'd ever be. I had waited to have sex because I wanted my first time to be with someone that cared about me and would be around to share not just the physical act, but the emotions that came with it as well.'
'I was scared that sex would hurt, and that fear made me more tense, so even though I was happy to be sharing that intimacy with my partner, I couldn't really relax and it hurt a bit. Afterwards, I was relieved that I'd finally gotten it over with, and didn't know if I would ever think sex was fun.'
'In the next weeks I learned that our culture obsesses about making the first time perfect, but chances are that the second, third, fourth, etc. times will be so much better. There's less subconscious pressure, and you'll learn what feels good for you.'
Tiffany wasn't in love the first time she had sex but that was something she had expected beforehand.
'I wasn't 'in love' or whatever, but I guess I never expected to be. He made me feel comfortable and respected, so one night, I went over and we had sex. It wasn't awkward or weird, and it wasn't this special magical moment either.'
'We went to a diner the next morning for breakfast and texted my best friend group chat the link to Lonely's Island's 'I Just Had Sex,' and I think they were more excited about it than me to be honest.'
And for Kelsey, her first time was unplanned but an experience she doesn't regret at all.
'I was on senior week, and I was hanging out with the boy I liked. His friend was asleep in his hotel room, so we did it on the balcony. It was completely unplanned, but I've never regretted it. I'm still friends with the guy, too.'
Kylie was 19 when she lost her virginity and said it happened during a 'Netflix and chill situation' which she later felt guilty about.
'The guy I had been talking to didn't know I was a virgin, and I didn't tell him because I was afraid it would scare him off.'
'Once I got home, I felt guilty because it wasn't how I imagined losing my virginity, and not something you get back. I cried for a little bit and then decided there wasn't anything more I could do about it. I couldn't change what had already happened. All in all it wasn't terrible, and I'm not sure I would change it.'
Debby and her boyfriend were both 17 when they had sex and waited until Christmas Eve so they would have the place to themselves.
'We waited until Christmas Eve when his parents had left for a holiday party. I was so incredibly nervous — l think we both were. So we lit candles and took it slow. To be honest it hurt like hell. But other than that l think it was pretty perfect as far as virgins go.'
But for Bianca, her first time was 'not romantic at all' and happened in the back of someones car.
'It was messy, drunk and horny. I was 17, drunk at a beach concert, called a guy that we had an on and off thing and we had sex in the back of his pickup car. Then, he went to study abroad and we never spoke about it, until like 2 years later.'
Shannon said that although she was an early bloomer, she wanted to wait until she went to college to lose her virginity.
'I was 20 when I lost my virginity. I decided that I wanted to wait until college to lose it, but when I finally got to college, I didn't really meet anyone that I wanted to have sex with, especially not for my first time. I ultimately decided to lose it to a guy that I really, really liked but wasn't in a relationship with.'
'I was just so ready to 'get it over with,' and this guy was (and still is) a great guy. My one regret in the entire experience is that I didn't tell him that I was a virgin. To this day he doesn't know! I was so scared that I was going to freak him out, but really, a lot of awkwardness could have been avoided if I'd just been honest.'
Like Shannon, Lee also wanted to 'get it over with' so she decided to have sex with her guy friend who she had known for a while.
'We were both virgins and just wanted to get it over with. It wasn't pleasurable or even fun, and throughout the entire process all I could think about was, when will this be over? Moral of the story — wait until you're really ready.'
Kayleigh lost her virginity when she was 15 years old to her boyfriend that was two years older than her.
She said they decided to do it after about three months of dating, which is when she knew for sure she was ready.
She said: 'We used a condom. Honestly, I didn't feel different after than I did before. Maybe just a little more mature. If you really think you're ready, and you and your partner protect yourselves, it can be a really cool thing.'
Katelyn was 16 when she lost her virginity to her boyfriend at the time who she had been dating for about eight months.
She said: 'Things were getting serious, so we decided to do it. I was expecting it to be so nice and amazing, but instead it was so painful.'
Cassidy's first time happened during her freshman year of college with an upperclassman frat bro who avoided her after it happened.
'He didn't text me at all and when I saw him at a party the next weekend he completely avoided me. If I walked into a room and we made eye contact he would immediately turn and walk out. It felt like a huge slap in the face. I liked him, but he had finally gotten what he wanted and that was it. He was over me.'
'I wanted nothing more than to go up to him and yell and ask him why he was being so mean to me when I had done nothing wrong, but every weekend he would completely avoid me or be talking with another girl when I walked by. I have to admit that I'm still not 100% over it or him.'
Mikayala had been dating someone for less than a month when he suggested they have sex to 'figure out if we have a spark to continue dating.'
'I was 18 and wanted to lose my virginity so I could fit in, but also because I really liked this guy. We had sex in a car (how romantic, right?). I was so nervous that he wouldn't feel that 'spark,' but he did. At the time, I felt amazing.'
'I thought I found the guy of my dreams and that we'd get married. We're no longer together, but I don't regret the experience. I just wished I had known I didn't need to have sex with a guy for him to approve of me or continue dating me.'
And for Brooklyn, she felt unprepared for sex despite having an open conversation about it with her mom.
'My mom tried to have an open and honest conversation about having sex so that I would feel less nervous when the time came.'
'But the conversation was always about boys, never being sexual with girls, so I felt completely unprepared when I went to have sex with my girlfriend for the first time.'
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In the Philippines, sex trafficking of young girls moves online
Mar 23, 2016 7:42 PM EDT
https://www.pbs.org/newshour/show/in-the-philippines-sex-trafficking-of-young-girls-moves-online
Sex tourism has long been a scourge in the Philippines. But now there's a disturbing new trend in the trafficking of mostly young women and children: vulnerable victims are being lured online and tricked into the trade. Special correspondent Fred de Sam Lazaro reports.
Next: a disturbing new trend in the trafficking of mostly young women and children into the sex trade.
Special correspondent Fred de Sam Lazaro reports from the Philippines on what police call cyber-trafficking.
It's part of his ongoing series Agents for Change.
Sex tourism has long been a scourge in the Philippines, an industry that thrives on trafficked human beings and deep poverty in this nation of 100 million.
Recent studies have shown that anywhere from 100 to more than 300 thousand Filipinos are trafficked each year; 80 percent, four out of five, are under the age of 18.
The government, under international pressure, has stepped up enforcement. Stings like this one to rescue young women are more common, as are arrests and convictions. But the sex trafficking industry, as always, seems a step ahead in the game.
IVY CASTILLO, Officer, Manila Police Cybercrime Center:
That's only one but there are a lot.
At the police cyber-crime center, officer Ivy Castillo explained one of the many ways that vulnerable young women are tricked into the trade.
So, they're pretending that this is a real modeling agency to entrap the young girls?
It has all the trappings of a glamorous fashion model agency, especially to a young rural Filipina girl.
At first, they are requested to send this image.
They're asked to submit pictures that seem innocuous, facial shots, ostensibly part of the selection process.
The next requirement is with a two-piece.
The next steps call for more revealing images, just the torso, not the face, they're assured, giving the false impression that it's unidentifiable. The young woman won't make the connection that computer software will, until it's too late.
They have got her face from her previous, more innocent images, and have Photoshopped them with the nude ones.
In no time, they are shamed and blackmailed into working for the opaque criminal networks behind the trade.
Lila Shahani is on a government task force on human trafficking.
LILA SHAHANI, Human Trafficking Task Force:
Cyber-pornography is easily one of our biggest problems. It's proliferated very quickly. and it's an expensive thing to police, and we're a Third World country.
But it's an industry fueled by First World demand, from pedophiles mostly in Europe, North America, and Australia, says officer Castillo.
These foreign perpetrators, they have contacts here in the Philippines, wherein these contacts are looking for children.
And perhaps the most frustrating challenge with this cyber-sex industry is a social one. Cecilia Oebanda, who founded the Philippines' largest anti-trafficking group, says many people don't believe or don't want to believe it's that harmful.
CECILIA FLORES-OEBANDA, Director, Visayan Forum Foundation:
Because they think that they're — the girls are just actually performing in the computer, and there's no contact, there is no touch. For them, it's OK. There's no harm actually put to the child.
At a shelter her agency runs is living proof that it's not just emotionally abusive, but also frequently escalates. The children are invariably inducted into traditional prostitution and its daily physical abuse.
These two 15-year-olds were rescued in a police sting from a cyber-porn racket. Their alleged pimp, a man named Jerrie Arraz began as a good samaritan neighbor.
There was a time when my mother need money because my stepfather was in jail. So she asked Jerrie for help.
He was really kind. When we didn't have food, he gave us food. Jerrie offered to send Gina to school.
This young woman is the 11th of 12 children in a family from one of the many rural Philippine islands beset by poverty and often natural disasters.
Opportunities are scarce, so, at 12, the offer of a scholarship from a kindly stranger, a man visiting to her village, was hard to resist.
He said that he's from Manila. So, I would say my dream is to study in Manila and to know the people, to — like, to wear nice clothes.
She accompanied the man to Manila, and was placed with Arraz, with whom he was apparently associated. She was in fact placed in school, but, gradually, there were demands, and they escalated, to display herself before strangers online, then to perform sexually and with Arraz in front of the camera.
He would wake me up to say there was a customer online and he wanted us to perform while the customer was watching. Each time, it happened, I just cried.
In time, the cyber-sex had escalated to plain old prostitution.
In a month, about four to five times, we met with foreign customers in a hotel, plus daily online.
It was when both girls were in a hotel one day that Arraz was nabbed as he negotiated with two undercover detectives posing as customers.
There were Caucasian — Caucasian undercover agents.
Prosecutor Jonathan Lledo was on the sting team, one of whose members hid in waiting.
He was inside the closet for four hours.
And the phone call rung that signaled that money exchanged hands. And we opened the door and announced. There was bewilderment. There was: What is happening here?
The young women, in terror, ran to their trafficker and to his defense.
We always felt like Jerrie was our father, so that's what we told rescuers. He is our father. We were really scared.
It's been called the Stockholm syndrome, Lledo says, one more complication in rescuing hostages who become sympathetic to their captor, and any change to what has become normal in their lives is unsettling.
The trafficker is providing them with food, clothing, shelter and a place to stay, and law enforcement will disrupt all this.
As it turns out, six children were removed from the home of Jerrie Arraz and placed with Oebanda's agency, including a 1-year-old infant abandoned by its mother.
The more immediate task is to try to restore childhoods through counseling and eventually adoption into homes, education and skills training for those older.
Most of our cases are referred from our foreign counterparts.
Philippine police officials say most of the enforcement comes from the consumer end. Tracking down providers is fraught with difficulty. They can be anywhere, evidence against them, if it exists, hidden in the cloud instead of a hard drive.
A lot of bad guys are not being caught, right?
Another big challenge is that police must rely on tips from the public, says task force member Shahani.
There is a real fear of — among informants of retaliation from big syndicates.
But Oebanda, who has long campaigned against trafficking, sees progress.
Our conviction rate has more than double. So, for me, that progress is indications of the political will.
Attention is now on Jerrie Arraz's trial, now under way in Manila. These images are from his Facebook page. It's the first so-called cyber-trafficking case to be brought, in hopes that it will mark a turning point.
For the "PBS NewsHour," this is Fred de Sam Lazaro in Manila.
Fred's reporting is a partnership with the Under-Told Stories Project at the University of St. Thomas in Minnesota.
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Sex Outdoor Young Girls
