Sex Hot Teen

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Long Island mom of two Elizabeth Trinca said she’d never allow her kids to have sex in the house.
Mom of four Lauren Schmid would never let her kids have sex under her roof: “Not a freaking chance in hell.”

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12/16/21

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Sex and the City? More like sex in the childhood bedroom.
Fans of the beloved HBO series were shocked when they tuned in for the reboot, “ And Just Like That …” last Thursday, and saw that the next generation was getting it on. Brady Hobbes — the now 17-year-old son of Cynthia Nixon’s Miranda (played by Niall Cunningham) — is in a hot and heavy relationship with his high school girlfriend, Luisa (Cree Cicchino). In an effort to go with the flow, Miranda and husband Steve have decided to let Luisa sleep over regularly — and are dealing with the gross consequences.
“I stepped on a used condom in Brady’s room this morning,” Miranda confesses to Carrie and Charlotte over brunch, mere moments into the “And Just Like That…” premiere. When her friends don’t react with sufficient horror, she adds, “Wait, I was barefoot at the time.”
Elizabeth Trinca said she immediately phoned her two sisters after watching this “oh hell no” scenario unfold.
“I couldn’t believe that Miranda was just allowing it to happen while she was home and picking up his used protection,” Trinca told The Post. “You need to have respect as a teen for your parents.”
Indeed, the mother of two from Long Island said she would never sanction that kind of behavior from her young son when he’s older. “I do not want to hear my son having sex. Do it when I’m not home.”
But other moms say they see the wisdom in Miranda’s permissive parenting.
“It’s not just a TV plotline — it’s a major reality check,” said Robin Gorman Newman, who has an 18-year-old son. “My trainer would tell me how the kids would rent out her gym to have parties and how they had to stand guard in the bathroom while the teens tried to have sex in the bathroom. It’s a thing.”
The Long Island founder of MotherhoodLater.com said that while she makes her son keep his bedroom door open when his girlfriend is at the house, she’d ultimately rather he have sex at home than in a random, and potentially dangerous, setting. “You don’t totally know what’s going on with your child … If teens want to have sex, they’re going to find a place to do it.”
Kimberly King, a certified early childhood education teacher and mom of three, agreed that that’s the big advantage of a liberal privacy policy with teens.
“Your child will not be trespassing on public or private property [if they’re having sex at home],” King said. “They won’t get charged with disturbing the peace or sex in public. They won’t have sex in the car,” she said, adding that it could also be a good opportunity to talk about “respect and boundaries.”
However, she warns that pitfalls can arise, especially if there are younger siblings around. “It can set a bad example for other kids in the house,” she said.
That’s precisely what happened when Long Island mother of four Christine Rose tried to turn the other cheek to the activity coming from her son’s bedroom downstairs.
One day, she said her 6-year-old son stood by the steps and exclaimed, “OMG — Danny’s bed is shaking really loud.”
“We all knew he was probably having sex with his girlfriend,” said Rose.
Still, she stands by her choice to let him explore his love life under her roof. “You have to be realistic as a parent today,” she said. “There’s really not much they can do to upset me. Teens will have sex and drink — you have to be real with them.”
Yet for author Lisa Milbrand, Miranda is letting things get a little too real in her Brooklyn brownstone.
“Set some boundaries already, Miranda,” she wrote in a blog for Parents online . “Like — maybe don’t let Brady’s girlfriend [sleep over] if you’re not comfortable with it? Even the coolest moms I know would definitely nip that in the bud.”
Mom of four Lauren Schmid doesn’t care if she comes off as uncool with her rules.
Would she let her pre-teens sleep with their partners at home one day, like Miranda and Steve? “Absolutely f–king not. It’s one thing for teens to be having sex, but to act like that in my home where I pay the bills? Absolutely not. It’s being so disrespectful. Not a freaking chance in hell. I’m not about to create opportunities to become an early grandma, either.”
The former New Yorker — who now lives in South Carolina — said that to avoid any confusion, she maintains ironclad ground rules. “No boys or girls in bedrooms — hanging out in the family room only.”
Schmid said that what was good enough for her as a teen is good enough for her kids. “I mean, I was that age and I would have died had someone’s parents heard me or saw me like that. I did the proper thing and sneak[ed] around.”
Additional reporting by Lambeth Hochwald

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THE VALUE OF MATERIALISM: A PSYCHOLOGICAL INQUIRY by Tim Kasser

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THE CHILD IN CHRISTIAN THOUGHT edited by Marcia J. Bunge

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BOB ABERNETHY , anchor: Now, a special report on the sexual pressures on pre-teenage girls. Parents, social critics, and many young girls themselves deplore it, but sex sells, so advertisers and entertainers use it to attract audiences. They use it without the regulation or social pressures that once were restraining forces. And they use it without censorship, which hardly anyone favors. Mary Alice Williams reports on the media and the children who are its targets.
MARY ALICE WILLIAMS : They’re sweet. The sexually debasing lyrics they’re mimicking aren’t. Ever since Elvis shimmied his pelvis, parents have worried about protecting their teens from the obscene. This is different. These aren’t 17-year-olds. They’re 11. And these self-confident sixth graders and even their younger siblings are increasingly exposed to torrents of overtly sexual messages by people selling things to preteens.
ALICE (Teenage Girl): It makes me feel like an object and feel really, really weird. And it is not like girls should be like that.
WILLIAMS : The culture tells them something different. They listen to music. Britney Spears made it big wearing a Catholic schoolgirl uniform. Look at her now. Most of BILLBOARD’s top 20 CDs are slapped with “Parental Guidance” stickers. They [kids] do homework on the Internet where there are lots of porn sites. They watch TV. The teen hit DAWSON’S CREEK on the WB alludes to oral sex and masturbation. In prime time, the Kaiser Family Foundation has catalogued an average of five sexual references per hour.
KERRY (Teenage Girl): This sexual stuff you don’t just see on TV. You see it day to day. It happens in middle school. It will happen in high school. You just see it around.
WILLIAMS : Professor Jean Bethke Elshtain is an ethicist with University of Chicago Divinity School.
Dr. JEAN BETHKE ELSHTAIN (University of Chicago Divinity School): There’s certainly a relationship between the culture and the increase of sex because of the many cultural messages that bombard young people daily.
WILLIAMS : According to studies, more girls than ever before are sexually active before their 15th birthday. One in 12 children has lost his or her virginity by the eighth grade. Almost a fourth of ninth graders have slept with four or more partners.
Dr. Michael Rich, a pediatrician who treats adolescents only, talks with his teenage patients daily about sexual issues. He says he is seeing more sexually transmitted diseases in younger and younger children and that expectations of sex have changed drastically.
Dr. MICHAEL RICH : What we are seeing now that is different from previous years, I think, is that sex is expected. Sex is part of the normal interaction, day-to-day interaction between boys and girls.
JERRY DELLA FEMINA (Advertising Executive): This is about as sexy as we get.
WILLIAMS : Advertising agent Jerry Della Femina doesn’t use sex to sell his clients’ products. But he knows why people do.
Mr. DELLA FEMINA : It’s easier to be lewd than to be creative, and people try to get attention, and the one thing that gets attention is sex. Sex sells. People turn around. They look at it.
WILLIAMS : Like many in the industry, he thinks it is up to the parents to monitor what their children see and hear.
Mr. DELLA FEMINA : I believe that it is the parents’ job to provide them with a sense of values so that if they do see something that is off, they are not affected by it.
WILLIAMS : Diane Levin, with the Coalition to Stop Commercial Exploitation of Children, studies the effect of culture on kids’ behavior.
DIANE LEVIN (Coalition to Stop Commercial Exploitation of Children): I have interviewed thousands of parents, and they agree it is their job and they try very hard to do it, but they can’t keep it out of their children’s lives. I resent that I have to struggle with this issue. I think that in the best of all possible worlds we would have a society that is trying to create an environment that helps parents in their job instead of making it harder.
Dr. ELSHTAIN : At one point in time in this culture, the assumption was that families and churches and schools, and even the wider culture, reinforced one another in helping to sustain children through a period of growing up. And I think that coherence has broken down.
STEPHANIE (Teenage Girl): The sixth graders learned how to do something they are not supposed to do. And it is called “giving booty.”
RACHAEL (Teenage Girl): The girl like gets in front of the guy and the guy is behind her.
CASEY (Teenage Girl): It’s like — I just don’t really want to tell you.
WILLIAMS : Like them, the majority of preteens don’t engage in sexual behavior, but they are aware of what they see around them. Sixth graders know about a concept many of their parents hadn’t heard of till college: oral sex. SEVENTEEN Magazine says 55 percent of teens have engaged in oral sex.
ALICE : According to a lot of people, it keeps you a virgin.
LEA (Teenage Girl): Because it is kind of like having sex, but you are not really doing anything and you can’t have a baby, and they don’t think there is any consequences.
Ms. LEVIN (referring to an ad): Her breasts look like they are about 50 percent of her weight.
WILLIAMS : Using sex to sell products starts early.
Ms. LEVIN : What they are seeing right now is a sexual relationship between males and females that is totally objectified — the sexuality that you see is not in the context of relationships. It is not in the context of caring and feeling. I am very worried about where this is going to lead. There is a whole set of problems that has to do with the relationships males and females are going to develop with each other.
WILLIAMS : What messages are you getting about who you are supposed to be?
CASEY : Perfect — big boobs, hips, a strong stomach, you know, pretty face, no zits.
SARAH (Teenage Girl): So basically stuff that is on the outside. Not on the inside.
WILLIAMS : It’s how these children should be developing on the inside that concerns ethicist Jean Bethke Elshtain.
Dr. ELSHTAIN : To the extent that your time is devoted to engaging in these kinds of activities, it’s taken away from other sorts of possibilities at very crucial ages for young people, when they’re learning how to be to the kinds of adults that they’re going to become.
WILLIAMS : How did it get this far? Television producers, advertisers, movie producers, magazine editors outdoing each other for the big sell — with almost no limits imposed on them.
Ms. LEVIN : The entertainment industry is unethical in its practice of marketing sex and violence to children. They will use whatever techniques they can to capture the attention of an audience so they will be interested and engaged and hopefully buy what is being marketed.
RACHAEL : Everyone has something, you know, that is not perfect about them. So I think that magazines, TV shows should stop putting that message out to everybody.
WILLIAMS : Can you legislate the images coming at our children? Jerry Della Femina doesn’t think so.
Mr. DELLA FEMINA : I don’t like that this is the way we are going as a nation. It is time to censor these people. I don’t want to be part of that.
Dr. ELSHTAIN : People have to get licenses to broadcast. So it seems to me that there’s some way, without in any way moving into real censorship, there are ways that you could set up certain guidelines.
Ms. LEVIN : One of the reasons it is so important that government play some role in regulating and setting standards is that once it becomes a level playing field for the whole industry, then it will help the whole industry become more ethical.
Dr. ELSHTAIN : We have the responsibility to affirm that which is worthy and good about our culture. And there’s so much to affirm. We also have the responsibility to say no, and I think we have to do both in equal measure and find some balance between them.
CASEY : It does rub off on you a lot of times, and it makes you feel that this is the way that you are supposed to be and that guys will like you because you have big boobs, and then after a while you think that it is normal.
WILLIAMS : Perhaps normal to adults too, to the extent that they are increasingly desensitized to the saturation of sexual messages and squeamish about talking with their children. Sex education is left to the schools, which are restricted from teaching the realities of oral sex and doing “booty.” But our children are still learning and absorbing values from what they see around them. I’m Mary Alice Williams for RELIGION & ETHICS NEWSWEEKLY in New York.
ABERNETHY : We tried to get comments from people in the TV, magazine, and record businesses who are using sex to sell, but their spokespeople all declined.
Funding for RELIGION & ETHICS NEWSWEEKLY is provided by Lilly Endowment. Additional funding is provided by individual supporters and Mutual of America Life Insurance Company.
Produced by THIRTEEN ©2015 WNET. All rights reserved.

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