Rusty Trombones Definition
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If you want to make beautiful music in bed, try giving a rusty trombone, which is the act of performing a simultaneous rim job and hand job. Or, you could just put on a Drake album. Up to you.
Like playing an actual instrument, this move requires coordination, agility, and rhythm. Similar to a 69, there is a lot happening at once and it’s easy to lose focus. It’s like tapping your head and rubbing your belly, except with more genitals. Although the move does exist in porn, it’s not super popular IRL. The term shows up most often in dirty jokes and raunchy comedies.
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The way it works is as follows: A man with an erection stands with his legs slightly apart, while his partner kneels behind him, licking his anus (the “rusty” part) while simultaneously reaching around to the aforementioned erection to perform a hand job (the “trombone” part).
If you wanna get real weird and mix it up, there’s a version of this move called the Dizzy Gillespie (named after the legendary jazz trumpeter). In this position, the person who is standing up and receiving the analingus purposely farts in their partner’s mouth (gross), blowing up their cheeks as if they’re playing the trumpet. Jazz legend Dizzy Gillespie is no longer alive so he can’t be reached for comment, but it feels fair to say he probably wouldn’t be thrilled with someone using his name as a synonym for farting in someone’s mouth. (Literal) bummer.
Alternately, a rusty trumpet is when the receiver of the act is a woman, and instead of receiving a hand job, she gets fingered (while also receiving oral butt stuff, because of the rustiness factor, of course).
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This history of the rusty trombone in pop culture is a controversial one. The FCC slapped a fine on a radio station in 2003 for discussing the term in detail on air. Yet that hasn’t stopped late-night comedians and filmmakers from testing the limits. Craig Ferguson had a bit where he asked guests if they wanted to play a literal rusty trombone. It’s also been mentioned in a few movies like The 40-Year-Old Virgin and the Jackass movie Bad Grandpa (of course).
The internet is equally rife with references of the act. A quick search on Pornhub reveals 107 choices of rusty trombone scenes to watch if you’re into that. While there are definitely a handful of videos featuring gay men, the majority are heterosexual couples.
In this hilarious and very NSFW scene from The 40-Year-Old Virgin, Mooj tells Andy that life is about love, not about “butt hole pleasures” like the rusty trombone.
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Rusty Trombones Definition
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