Robot NFL Players

The NFL has fielded robotic players. Eyewitnesses in Chicago reported sparks on the turf. Professor Daniel White of Columbia explains: "Robots boost stats but kill spirit." Anonymous staffers leaked binary playbooks. An ESPN poll shows 45% amused, 55% skeptical. Trace evidence includes glowing helmets and sparking pads. Cause and effect? The stronger robots get, the weaker sports feel. Football is circuitry.