Roast Beef Vag Meme
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Roast Beef Vag Meme
Boyfriend (28m) said that my (21f) vagina looked like “roast beef”
relationship_advice
Original (deleted)
Boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years and have never had an issue like this. We have sex everyday and he has seen every part of my body and never said anything even remotely hurtful and criticizing.
Last week we were all at a friends house and somehow the topic became how all vaginas are different. My boyfriend then said at a point that he was skeptical at first when we were having sex because my vagina resembled roast beef. I was shocked and didn’t know what to even say. Another girl said “what the fuck that’s just rude” and he said “ it was a joke I’m just kidding” it honestly really hurt my feelings and I just went to bathroom and cried. On top of that it was humiliating. I am now feeling insecure about myself we haven’t had sex since. He says that I am overreacting and that I can’t take a joke but I don’t find it funny at all. I’m still very hurt my that. Am I being too sensitive?
Tldr: boyfriend said a very mean and hurtful joke about my vagina resembling roast beef. Am I overreacting to still be very upset and hurt by this?
Saying that in general is bad enough, but saying it in front of friends ? The fuck is wrong with him? I'm sure he'd find it hilarious if you told your friends how tiny his dick is. What a complete douchemobile.
The only positive about this guy saying it in front of friends is that it gave OP proof that other people finds his comment as completly unaccaptable as she does and that her bf is deliberatly trying to gaslight her with his whole ”you’re overreacting” routine. As soon as the bf said it he was called out in no uncertain terms. Both OP and the bf knows that what he said is considered unacceptable, yet the bf still tried to make OP out like the crazy one for being upset and OP is uncertain if she has a right to be upset. But the truth is in the others reaction: ”what the fuck that’s just rude”.
He’s making her question her perception of the situation (to such an extent that she’s now here asking us) while it’s painfully obvious what he did was inappropriate; so much so that someone openly challenged his behaviour in what was obviously a friendly setting.
That’s very clear and obvious gaslighting.
It's being defensive, you don't have to use the buzzword 'gaslighting' at every opportunity.
Yup. People on this sub jump so quickly to use the term "gaslighting," it's not accurate most of the time it's used.
He’s an idiot for saying that. Period. But if you have sex everyday, he has no idea how good he has it! What a fucking idiot!
He says that I am overreacting and that I can’t take a joke
Classic verbal abuser. He can say any nasty thing he wants but your genuine reaction is somehow inappropriate.
Don't fuck people who say shit about your body.
Immediatly aftter he said it he was called out by another person. It was made absolutly clear to him that other people considers his comment completly unacceptable. So him acting oblivious and claiming that OP is having an odd reaction is a demonstrable lie . He is using an abusing and manipulative tactic (gasligting) to try to avoid responsibility and adressing OPs valid feelings and concerns.
That's not gaslighing. That's being manipulative.
Gaslighting can be causing someone to question their perception of events despite their feelings being obvious initially. Her feelings were obvious: she cried. He’s making her question whether she overreacted. Gaslighting.
Or, you know, maybe that’s his opinion? Lol people act so fucking butt hurt in this thread it makes me wanna throw up
I agree with you generally in this subreddit. However, saying shit like that in front of people (and humiliating her) was shitty. What part of what he said was funny? Some guys are incredibly dumb.
OP, Tell everyone how it is a perfect fit since roast beef goes along great with a small pickle with warts. Watch how fast he becomes insecure and defensive.
oh my gosh you poor thing how will you cope
A lot of very sensitive people on this subreddit lol
If you think it’s sensitive to not want to be openly mocked in front of a group of your friends about something as private as your sex organs then you’re probably an unbearable asshole tbh
You weren’t there how the fuck would you know? I can totally picture a situation in which it would be funny to say such a thing and just laugh it off. Seriously people on here just got this one size fits all advice for each and every kind of problem and it’s to break things off. I find a lot of times people try to make a point by saying op’s bf or gf comments were unacceptable and they forget that they’ve gone overboard a few times or made inappropriate comments in the past that didn’t necessarily deserve a break up.
What dude would be happy if his chick said his penis looked like a green bean.
Roast beef with green beans sounds pretty good
Nah, I was just pretty hungry but I'm eating now so it's all good.
different though. green bean is bad, cuz it means he small
roast beef? doesnt mean anything. it just mean that it look like roast beef. there is no beauty standard for vaginas. There is a beauty standard for dicks
I am not saying there should be, but with the disappearance of pubic hair and the wide spread availability of porn, there is in fact a (unreasonable) beauty standard for vaginas.
lol nobody likes pubic hair, guys or girls. thats somethign that applys to both genders. Manscaping is a thing
the point is that I don't know why people take "roast beef" as such a bad insult. I mean, it literally doesnt' mean anything. "My vagina looks like Roast beef". TF that supposed to mean?
Roast beef is an insult that plenty of guys use for vaginas. It means it looks beat up like roast beef. Ever heard of “beef curtains” it’s along the same lines of that. Pretty much just means the vagina looks like it’s been through some things. It’s very insulting. It is the same thing as calling him a green bean. It’s just as rude.
lmao okay didnt' know that. nobody really uses that phrase where Im at, so I wouldn't know
You sure do a lot of talking about things you don't know about.
So I am 52. When I was in high school vaginas looked like hair. Now you can see it. Females are sensitive about how they look. I read an article, BBC I think. Girls as young as 9 asking about vaginal cosmetic surgery.
Females do not want to hear that a vagina looks like a hunk of meat.
Ew. How would a 9yo even know that their thing looked so weird it needed surgery?
Actually a lot of people think that your vagina looks more like roast beef of you've had more partners. There's absolutely a beauty standard.
Lol where I live it's literally the law that vaginas in porn magazines have to be photoshopped so the inner lips are smaller.
how does that work? do imported mags have to abide by that rule as well? or just locally manufactured mags?
I just looked it up and it's "soft core" porn and the labia has to be airbrushed to show a single small crease otherwise it's not allowed, so yes all of them imported or made here.
Australia. If any of the inner lips show then it's considered offensive and hard core porn even if they are doing the same pose as a girl with smaller inner lips... it sets an unrealistic standard.
Hell no. Fuck that bullshit. You are not overreacting. That is insulting and incredibly hurtful. Don’t let him get away with this; He humiliated and insulted you at the same time in front of your friends. I honestly think I would dump my boyfriend if he was the kind of person who thinks that’s okay. Your body deserves more respect than that.
I don't think I would. I know I would dump him. What kind of asshat insults their partner about a private thing to a large group of people. (3 strikes there. Insulting partner. No-no. Disclosing privacy. Also nope. Humiliating her publicly? Hell no.) And passes it off as a joke even after people have told him that its rude and unacceptable. Dude has no regard for your privacy, no regard for your feelings, and apparently no respect for you or your body.
Kick him to the curb, honey, cause if he wanted beef, now he's got some beef with you.
Even though what he said was disrespectful, you should also take into consideration that he was most likely joking. Terrible joke, yes, but still. I can't believe how you all say how you would leave your partner if he said that.
What would be the reason of your break up? Made a terrible joke that hurt me? OP needs to talk to him first and explain to him that it was really rude from his side to say that. If he carries on then good bye. He said it's just a joke. But it hurt her and he knows that. He continues and its over.
God, with this sub. Breaking up is not an everyday thing. Stop suggesting it all the fucking time. It should be the last resort.
Really? Expose her intimacy, humiliate her among friends, make the girlfriend insecure, dismiss her feelings, don't acknowledge the issue, refuse to take responsibility, shift the blame and act immature for a frigging 28 yrs old are all awesome reasons to stay together and keep giving the dude a chance? Screw that. She did talked to him and he shifted the blame to her by saying she is overeating and can't take a joke while he should be concerned and apologized for being insensitive. If he don't come to light with his very poor and awful actions and make it up to her, it is indeed a reason to breakup for lack of respect to her.
Well it says that she did try talking to him, but he told her that she just can’t take a joke :/
Honestly that’s definitely breakup worthy for me. If my husband humiliated and hurt me like that, okay, we can work past it. He was just joking, didn’t mean it, was trying too hard to be funny, etc. I could forgive and forget if he apologized, and meant it. But if he essentially told me to get over it? That I’m overreacting? Fuck that.
If I were OP I’d give this guy one more chance; really emphasize how hurtful his words were, really try to drive home how much it’s impacting her. If he still won’t apologize, then I agree it’s breakup time. Something like that would hang over my head always . I would never be able to have sex with my husband again if he said something like that and we never reconciled.
I’m going to take a wild guess here and assume that you’re not a woman. How would you be able to relate or empathize with her? What he did was clearly disrespectful. He’s not considering her feelings at all by trying to simply dismiss the issue by telling her that she’s “overreacting” when he hurt her.
Breaking up is absolutely an every day thing. People don't break up quickly enough. Any disrespect that is either: not immediately followed by a contrite apology and penance OR, regardless of how good the apologies are, a repeated offence, should be the absolute end of a relationship.
That's why a 26-year old goes for a 19-year old, to find someone who won't push back. Dump him and learn a lesson about finding someone who considers you a peer.
You've been good enough for him to sleep with for 2 years. Now he shames you to try to be funny in front of friends? Then, rather than be truly sorry, he blamed you for being too sensitive?
Nope the hell out of there. Boy bye.
At his age, this isn't immaturity; it is a character trait.
What’s he been saying about her when she isn’t there ?
Sounds like he wants to break up with you, agreed
Oh god. You’re not overreacting at all! That was an extremely hurtful and tasteless “joke” I too would be very hurt. What an immature thing to really think that was funny in any way. You have every right to be pissed and hurt.
Suggest he finds a boyfriend whose testicles look like meatballs, if he's not into roast beef.
You should drop that asshole. He doesn't deserve you. What a crude and awful analogy.
He says that I am overreacting and that I can’t take a joke
Aggghhh!!! I HATE people do say, or do, cruel or mean things and then when confronted about it they try to turn it around on the subject of their meanness by saying "can't you take a joke". It shows they have a deeply rooted evil streak and should be avoided.
IKR? What he said is bad, but they could move past it if he at least acknowledged how shitty it was, and apologized. The whole, “Can’t you take a joke” thing is what really makes this guy an asshole.
I’m sure your vagina is perfect and he’s a shitstain. Lose him
Wtf???? Saying that in front of your friends? Wtf is wrong with him?
You are not going to be marrying a 26 year old man who picked you up whe you were 19 and too young to know better.
If you want to stay, go ahead its not my job to tell you how to live your life.
But you are too young to waste time that could be used growing into that bad ass woman you will become. Any MAN at 28 years old who makes jokes about his GF's pussy and humilates her in public is an immature piece of shit.
The reason he picked you isn't because you are special. The reason he picked you is that women his own age would never put up with his bullshit, so he goes for young naieve women who will be to insecure and aren't emotionally mature enough to recognize all the red flags he wears proudly.
Its insanely immature to describe a part of your girlfriends naked body to your friends especially the vagina. You have a right to be offended but fyi all vaginas sorta look like roast beef and vaginas and roast beef are amazing.
Also, I something else to add (don’t want you to miss it, so I’m not editing my other comment), but the whole “it was just a joke, lighten up” thing is emotional abuse.
He hurt your feelings, but he’s trying to make it your fault instead of his.
With a very sincere and concerned look on your face, tell him that while you didn't want to say anything before it seems that now you've reached a point in your relationship where you can be open and honest. Tell him that his penis doesn't satisfy you and when you look at it, you're repulsed. Tell him it resembles something unappealing like a Vienna sausage or a baby toe. Tell him you love him but sexually . . . Meh. Let him sit with that one and see how he feels.
Ok that's super petty but perhaps you can give him that analogy so he can understand. Any guy, much less a 28 year old grown adult man, should know better than to tell their partner something so immature, especially in front of other people. What was his preferred outcome there? Were you supposed to be thankful that he's told you this? Were you supposed to want your friends to know what your bf thinks of your vagina? He sounds like a 12 year old little boy.
The only way what he said would be forgivable is if he immediately realized how hurtful it was and apologized. Instead, he had to be called out by other people AND be told how hurtful it was by you later on, AND he’s fucking doubling down.
If he’s going to mock your body, he doesn’t deserve to see it or touch it or have anything to do with you at all.
If he’s going to mock your body, he doesn’t deserve to see it or touch it or have anything to do with you at all.
Can I just emphasize this? It’s the harshest truth to learn. I had an ex who teased me relentlessly about aspects of my appearance I was already self conscious over. It destroyed my self worth.
Nice people stop ‘joking’ when they notice they’re causing hurt feelings.
Yea this sounds like my ex he’s going to downplay your feelings. Also the age difference is a little bit of a red flag in a situation like this he possibly goes for younger girls so he has more power over them? Has he always dated much younger girls? I would leave immediately. Two years is a long time but I left my ex after four. Moving on is the best part and even though the breakup will be hard you’ll be happy that you left such an asshole. No man should make you feel bad about your body. Most men don’t care about what your vagina looks like. My abusive ex told me mine was ugly too!! And my new boyfriend always literally moans while eating me out. Find someone who loves you for you. Your vagina is beautiful no matter what (:
What a bitchbiscuit. To say that, let alone in from of friends.
You should have said, 'I was apprehensive too, because of your small...'
I wonder how he would have reacted.
He has to apologize to you and need to promise you that he will not do anything like that in the future otherwise it would become a deal breaker thing for you. You are not over reacting a bit in my opinion as it is clear that he disrespected you and humiliated in front of other people which is not acceptable but if you love him and apart from this everything is okay then try to get rid of it but that is only possible if he apologies to you in the first place.
This was not a joke but he had to cover up the damage so he told you that it was a joke and you did not need to react this way. As far as your body is concerned you should not worry about anything and be proud of your body and your vagina as there is nothing like this which is weird in your body and it is his thinking only and nothing else so make sure that your self-esteem would not get ruined because of his comments.
Holy shit. No way girl. This is one of those cases you need to love yourself more and leave him. First of all ew how tacky of him to discuss something so personal about you in front of others second of all how childish to call you out. Lastly he insulted you in front of others and made you the Butt of the joke and got mad when called out. Leave him. You can do better hun. As for the vagina thing, all vaginas are different and it might not seem like it but it they are and it’s okay if yours isn’t like other girls.
Wow. If he GENUINELY liked you and cared about you he wouldn’t have said that. He knew what he said would hurt you. He humiliated you in front of your friends. This dude is almost 30 and he doesn’t know how to respect his partner. The entire scenario sounds like something a high schooler would do. Break up with him because he sounds like a child.
You mean your ex-boyfriend said this right? Because he's an asshole. Find someone who respects you and deserves you. Your current boyfriend is not that guy.
Your partner - who is supposed to be supportive and always have your back - just said something extremely hurtful to you. It doesn’t matter if he was “joking” or not.
Find a guy that appreciates a lady as awesome as you.
I don't understand what guy would say something like that.
It's a common thing among Incels on Reddit. They call women who they consider sluts "roasties", which means they have "roast beef vaginas" (because according to them, the more sexual partners a woman has, the more elongated their labia become). I'm aware that it's ridiculous, I'm just telling you that it's an unfortunately common thing for guys to talk about, online anyway :/.
I’m a guy and between my male friends we don’t use that lingo. At most I have heard online beef curtains.
Yeah that's why I mentioned Incels, because they're literally the only group of people I've ever heard use that term. I've never heard anyone say such a thing in person before though. (Not to mention it's just rude, I can't imagine a boyfriend saying something like that to his girlfriend).
What a stupid cow, I can't believe he said that about your vagina.
I wonder how he would feel if you joked about how his dick looked like a tiny sausage covered by a wrinkly turtleneck.
*hugs* It's normal to be upset and hurt, especially when he's downright disrespecting you and being a douche in front of your friends. Actually even if he said this to you alone, it's infuriating.
You don't deserve that. :(
Oh hell no if my boyfriend said this to me I would dump him
That is incredibly embarrassing and not a good joke. Comedy is not your boyfriend's strong suit. I would let him know how b
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