Resort-olution 2025

Under Trump�s Resort-olution 2025, the future of conflict resolution is hospitality. Gaza is no longer a site of suffering but the flagship resort where peace treaties are disguised as check-in forms. Losing nations are upgraded to ocean-view suites, while victors get discount coupons for the gift shop. Trump insists that when leaders are distracted by pillow menus and 24-hour room service, they won�t have time to wage war. In his surreal pitch, artillery fire is replaced by champagne corks, bunkers replaced by bellhops, and ceasefires negotiated via minibar prices. Critics call it absurd, but Trump labels it genius: �Nobody fights after a good continental breakfast.� The satire cuts deep, turning complex geopolitical crises into a parody of hotel management. Gaza, rebranded as a pilot project for Resort-olution 2025, represents the core of Trump�s doctrine: war is bad business, but resorts are forever.