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More Than Half of Teen Boys Think Porn Is Realistic
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This is problematic on several levels.
Porn is a lot of things, but there is one thing it's not: real. And even though there are a lot of the things we see in porn that seem so fake it may seem obvious they're not real, apparently that's not the case.
A new study shows that 53% of teen boys and 39% of teen girls think the sex acts they see in porn are realistic. The findings are based on an online survey of more than 1,000 people ages 11 to 16 in the UK, as well as an additional 74 people ages 11 to 16 who participated in an online discussion forum and online focus groups.
What’s potentially even scarier is the study showed that pornography is how a lot of people in this age range are learning about sex:
“It was helpful in some ways. I wanted to know what sex is. At least now I know.” - a 12-year-old female said.
“A few of my friends have used it for guidance about sex and are getting the wrong image of relationships." - a 13-year-old female said.
“Its give a unrealistic view of sex and our bodies makes us self consious [sic] and question why are bodies are not developed like what we see online." - a13-year-old female said.
“One of my friends has started treating women like he sees on the videos - not major - just a slap here or there." - a 13-year-old male said.
This is problematic on several levels. Porn often depicts fantasies. But when those depictions of fantasies don't include all the other things that accompany sex — like consent, or safe words if necessary, or discussion of the terms or acts — that could lead to a very messed-up view of what sex is and should be (which is: enjoyable for both consenting parties).
To be clear, sex should be enjoyable for everyone in the act, and if it’s not, you have every right to speak up. Speaking up can mean anything from telling your partner to stop, or even gently coaching your partner so that what they’re doing feels better for you. During sex, you can use your voice at any time and your partner should respect that.
If anything, though, the new report shows the real problem is lack of sex education — or at least, enough of it to realize that porn is unrealistic and that sex between non-actors must involve a bunch of conversations beforehand from birth control to consent. We should be teaching what sex between consenting people means, and how to negotiate that consent. Fortunately, there are resources available, from your local Planned Parenthood to our guide to consent. If you’re looking to learn more about sex, go to a trusted source.
The young person’s guide to conquering (and saving) the world. Teen Vogue covers the latest in celebrity news, politics, fashion, beauty, wellness, lifestyle, and entertainment.
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