Rape Slut

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Rape Slut

The Four Levels of Slut Sleeping around carries an unfair double standard, but sluttiness does have levels.
by Nathan DeGraaf | June 21, 2006
Points in Case is a daily literary humor publication featuring enlightening and irreverent comedy from seasoned writers and fresh voices, since 1999.
Main: Man, she’s a whore?
Nathan: How can you say that? She never got paid.
Main: I stand corrected. She’s a slut.
I think it’s unfair that women are often considered sluts for sleeping around. Women say that this perception of them propagates a double standard because men are never considered sluts for rampant sexual activity. (Although, if that were truly the case, then why do so many women I know call me a slut?) And recently, because I just dumped a girl who cheated on me, I have been pondering exactly what it is that makes a girl a slut .
Now, when I get to pondering, well, sometimes I just have to get out a pen and write down my thoughts. This was one of those times. You see, there are many different kinds of sluts, and there is not one hard and fast rule that simply defines a woman as a slut. But there are (at least) four levels of slut.
“Sadly, the Cheating Slut is really what most men mean when they say ‘slut' or ‘whore.' The first two levels are just people being people.”
This woman is not technically, by definition, a slut. She is the woman who gets stereotyped as a slut simply because she likes to fuck around. This woman typically has no boyfriend (or a boyfriend who doesn’t care that she fucks other men) and simply goes out looking to get laid. She doesn’t feel that she should have to settle down, and she thinks it’s unfair that other women degrade her for this. She is right. She is also one of the reasons I get up in the morning.
Of the last four women I’ve slept with, three fall into this category because (as far as I know), they were not cheating on anyone, were not lying about who they fucked, and were not asking for anything more than sex. Women love sex, too; they should not be blamed for seeking it. Stereotypes hurt everyone. Ironically enough, usually other women hate this girl because she can fuck who she wants, while men bare her no ill will. She is, after all, simply doing what she likes. And men, for the most part, respect that.
Unlike the whores that make up the second level of slut.
Much like the Sexually Liberated Woman, this slut has no boyfriend. She does however, and for whatever reason, feel she needs to lead men on. She fucks several different men at one time while tricking the men she fucks into thinking that they are pursuing a relationship. Which is to say that every one of the suckers she fucks happens to think that they’re the slut’s soon-to-be boyfriend. She also loves seeing men fight over her, which may be (at least in part) the motivation for her leading these poor bastards on.
The main thing that separates her from the Level 1 Slut is that she is not honest with the men in her life because she derives pleasure from wrapping suckers around her little finger. The women representing this level of slut usually leave me alone. I’m not sure why, but I’m pretty sure the Garden Variety Slut has a radar for suckers, and because I am not one, I hardly have to deal with these bitches.
I can’t say the same for the sluts in levels 3 and 4.
Cheating Sluts come in three different categories. There are those who simply cheat on a boyfriend they’ve had for a few months and then tell him (no big deal); those who cheat on a guy they’ve dated for a few months, never tell him, and force him to find out from his friends (a slightly bigger deal because these sluts lack honesty); and then there are the worst kind—the sluts who fuck around on a man they’ve been with for years and never tell him about it.
The first girl I fucked after the breakup belonged in last category. The bitch was engaged. She fucked me late in the afternoon and left early in the evening because her man would soon be arriving from work. To her fiancée, I say, “I hope your parents are proud of you for preparing to marry a 21-year-old waitress with no education. Oh, and by the way, I’ve never met a girl who had a tell for her female ejaculation before. I mean, her leg quivers like an epileptic in mid seizure and then she squirts. That’s kind of weird. And yes, I like her body, too.”
Sadly, the Cheating Slut is really what most men mean when they say “slut” or “whore.” The first two levels are just people being people, not people being disloyal bitches. What separates this level of slut from the fourth and final level of slut, is, quite simply, the motivation for cheating.
Fortunately for me, I live in a college community where finding a man with his own car, no roommates and a steady income is like hitting the jackpot for most girls. Unfortunately for me, this means I often get hit on by the Money Grubbing Slut.
The saddest thing about the Money Grubbing Slut is that she really does like (or even love) her boyfriend. She simply expects more from her man in terms of monetary consideration. She doesn’t make her own money and can’t live off her boyfriend’s petty McDonald’s wages, so she seeks out men who will take her to nice places and buy her shiny objects. This is the worst kind of whore because she’s pissing on love and respect all in the name of a few dollars.
I love promising this girl I will take her some place nice, then fucking her and ordering a pizza, explaining to her that I’m broke. After this, I can usually count the seconds until she leaves, feeling used. Then I double check my wallet; you can’t trust a Money Grubbing Slut (at least, not until she starts making her own money, in which case, the nickname gets changed to “Materialistic Shark,” which is unfair—I mean, why blame a girl for wanting money and making it?).
So guys, the next time you take a woman home from a bar, or fuck her in the bathroom at a party, or on the rooftop of a shopping mall, or in the grass median on the side of a highway (you know, whatever works for you), you may want to consider exactly what level of slut you are fucking. Remember, it’s not wrong if it’s just sex for sex’s sake (hell, female sexual liberation was the best thing to come out of the women’s rights movement). But if she’s in a relationship with some other guy (or guys) when you first fuck her, odds are she’s not the kind of girl you want to spend six bucks on.
Then again, few women are worth six bucks.
Nathan DeGraaf graduated fucking years ago with a BA in Creative Writing from the University of South Florida, which he still lives near because college chicks are the best. On... See full profile »
When we were told to chase our dreams, nobody mentioned they’d be mostly anxiety dreams.

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By
Chrissy Stockton ,
September 24th 2013



In my experience, the people who call people sluts in an attempt to insult them aren’t even aware of the actual “truth” in their insult. They’re just saying a woman could, possibly have slept around. And that’s bad. I wanted to know what elicited this kind of insult from people so I asked Thought Catalog readers to tell me what they were doing when they were called a slut. Here are the (heartbreaking) responses.
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In the 8th grade, a girl called me a slut because she said I stuck out my boobs all the time in class and made flat-chested girls like her feel insecure. In reality, I was just trying to have better posture/sit up straighter to look skinnier because I was insecure around thin girls like her. COOL.
I walked down the street in a hot pink turtleneck dress. I was also simultaneously called a faggot. By a bunch of college-age-seeming dudes in down vests.
One time someone spread a rumor that I was a huge “ho” and when I investigated, her reasoning for me being a ho was my last name (Hodin).
Driving my car in Minneapolis at 5:30 pm home from work. Merged and dude yelled out his window that I was a slut.
When I was in middle school, I was called a whore and a hoe. I had never even kissed someone before. I had never had a boyfriend. I’m not sure I had even hugged a member of the opposite sex that wasn’t like, my dad. But I was called this because I had big boobs, and sometimes a little cleavage would come out of my shirt. I’m not talking about push-up-bra Anna Nicole Smith cleavage, I mean, I wore unpadded bras and if my shirt weren’t up to my neck, it was just what happened. It’s just how it was. I wasn’t inappropriate in any way shape or form. But I was called a slut. Because if you embrace who you are and threaten other girls with the idea that you are more sexually attractive than they are that’s what you’ll be called.
I was called a slut while being raped.
I’ve been called “bitch/slut/whore” so many times, that it’s entirely lost its meaning. I doubt very many people have been called a slut to their face, except by an abusive partner… I’m sure people think it’s slutty that I’m a stripper, and I’ve probably been called a slut behind my back because of it. I think the only time I’ve been aware that I was being called a slut was drunken party flirtations when I was a teen. I’m really into the kind of “pro-slut”/owning your sluttiness thing that’s been happening. Let’s reclaim the word! Sluts are more fun, anyways.
My affinity for sex toys has gotten me that label from someone once.
The time a guy has called me a slut with the most viciousness in his demeanor, I don’t think he knew my sexual history, he just knew I was sleeping with someone and he was angry that I wasn’t interested in sleeping with him.
I had a hard time remembering the last time someone called me a slut because kinda feels normal.
My honest experience is that I’ve called myself a slut and whore more than anything else, and I think that’s important, because I think it speaks to what we’re taught about ourselves. I haven’t had many partners, actually, and by anybody else’s terms I’m considered under-experienced, but just one one night stand leaves me feeling like a pathetic “whore” rather than a woman who is proud of her sexuality and acts on her desires.
I was called a slut by my own grandmother when I was 12 because I wore a swimsuit in which my cleavage showed (my breasts came in earlier than most girls). Let’s just say, we didn’t have the greatest relationship after that. She was also an alcoholic and a racist, so no complaints from me!
I mentioned to the girl I thought was my best friend that I wanted to lose my virginity to my then-boyfriend. It ended up not happening, but it was enough for her to call me a slut the second my back was turned.
I was cheerfully walking back from the shop and two men in a car parked outside the pizza place below my apartment barked at me, shouted slut, and spat at me. I was wearing no make up, a stained and ripped hoodie, trackie bottoms, and hi tops. They were both very charming.
I was called a slut because I called someone out who happened to be incredibly sexist. A male friend and I had agreed to live with this guy and his friend in our second year of uni. We later found out that he’d also agreed to move in with another group of people.
When we called him out on it and asked him which group he’d be living with (because we needed to get contracts signed in order to have a place to live) he became incredibly hostile and the situation culminated in him shouting at me that I was a slut.
Naturally there was no abuse hurled at my male friend. The guy was so aggressive towards me that it actually made me cry. This was just one of a number of events which preceded a night during which he came back to the flat drunk and hit me in the face. Yay for randomly assigned flatmates in first year.
My roommate and so-called friend called me a slut because I joined a sorority.
I was called a slut for not sleeping with a guy. He later corrected himself, though, and told me I was “the opposite of a slut, which is even worse.” At least we got that straightened out.
When I moved to a new middle school, I was called a slut the first week I was there because I supposedly had given a guy a blowjob. I didn’t know who the guy was and didn’t even know what a blowjob was. I was 12.
I got called a slut because my ex-boyfriend started a rumor about me sleeping with his friend. He did it to cover up his tracks since he was a controlling and abusive scumbag and didn’t want anyone to find out. So he attempted to make me look bad.
I was called a slut for breaking up with a guy after he cheated on me.
I have been called a slut and a whore on various occasions by my mother when we get into fights, because she suspects that I’m having sex with my boyfriend, which is apparently the root of all my “evil”. Did I mention I’m 27 and a contributing member of society?
My mother called me a slut when I was 13 because I wore lipgloss and a short skirt.
I was called a slut several times in my life, either directly to my face as a confession or behind my back. My supposedly “girlfriends” didn’t show me they thought i was a slut but sometimes during conversations they would say things like , “oh yeah I slept with a guy but I’m not as bad as you.” What the heck does that even mean?!
Girls who end up being my friends (or at least thought I was a good friend after all) will feel guilty and confess to me that they had told people I was a slut, this baffles me because it was really random and unrelated to the conversation we were having and they don’t even know me.
Boys who didn’t get what they want from me called me a slut.
My stepmother called me a slut upon finding out I have a boyfriend. My social escort mother called me a slut and even told me I came out from one too (way to go, Mom). yes just put the shame on my, ladies.
I’m fairly decent and very soft-spoken. I don’t sleep around. I look nerdy, I wear glasses and read books all day. I can’t even swear and I find it offensive when people do. So what the hell people?!
Oh and an ex-boyfriend told me that people thought I was a slut because I have a huge rack for someone petite. Oh yeah, that explains.
A married lady who likes my boy friend calls me a slut only because my boy friend has chosen me over her and because I am a divorcee. So I am a slut. The fact, I didn’t have any other guy in my marriage. I waited for months after I divorced to have a boy friend.
Once, when I was in high school, I was called a “stuck-up slut” for not stopping when a boy cat-called at me. He was angry. I had never had a boyfriend in high school and never had kissed anyone until I kissed a woman began to realize my sexuality and accept myself for who I am.
I was called a slut by 3 older girls for wearing a bright shiny pink coat on my way to my piano lesson. My mother sew that coat for me and I refused to wear that coat ever again, feeling shame whenever I saw it. I was 11 or 12…
I was called a slut early in high school because I was so short that normal-sized tops always hung a bit lower down my chest than they would on other people. The clothes available to me were made for girls with longer torsos, and I just didn’t happen to be one of them.
I was called a slut by a group of girls in high school. I stayed a virgin throughout those four years.
I’m with Allie, I called myself a slut and a whore more than anything else. I had an extremely restrictive eating disorder, and I was conditioned to be ashamed about wanting anything too much. Anytime I so much as flirted with a guy — when I was sick — I would immediately, almost instinctively, think to myself, “god, you stupid slut, he’s never going to love you, no one is, you don’t deserve to have anything…” on and on, along those lines, as I usually skipped the following meal entirely as opposed to whatever small amount of food I was going to eat.
It’s so beyond horrifying to me now, that I associated how awful and low I thought I was (I could literally feel my face forming a sour expression when I thought that way about myself) with condemning myself for having any kind of needs, sexual or otherwise. Because that’s the underlying insult with “slut” I think — it’s not so much about sexuality, but that women aren’t supposed to want anything too much.
My mother called me a slut (and accused me of statutory rape) after I confided in her that I had lost my virginity to my then-boyfriend. I was 18, he was 17, and we had been dating for over a year.
My roommate last year called me a slut behind my back because I have sex with my boyfriend, and wear dresses on a daily basis.
my friend found out I lost my virginity (I’m in college) and continues to call me a slut, say I have no morals etc etc.
Called a slut by my guy friend while we’re having sex. Then I responded “I’m your slut.” :(
Someone I once considered a friend waited for me to get on a plane then told the first guy I ever loved that I was a slut and didn’t deserve him. Perhaps, most tellingly, I rid myself of a two-faced female who was so uncomfortable with her sexuality she had to speak ill of me and gained an honest, open hearted partner who never made me feel ashamed to be anyone other than myself.
I was chatting with a guy on a dating website, he was on webcam (this was years ago, I didn’t own one). He asked if I wanted to see his penis, and I said no. He tried to move the camera down there, anyway and I immediately exited out of the chat. He sent me another message calling me a slut.
I was called a slut on social media by my (then) boyfriend who read through my facebook messages and saw that I referred to him as ‘going on holiday with someone’ to a male friend. I still gave him a chance after that.
I got called a slut an hour ago from a work colleague .. I asked why, she said no reason.
i got called a slut while i was wearing my high school uniform, waiting for my dad to pick me up at night. so to speak, i was called a slut for being a woman out at night.
First time I was called a slut was because some guy liked me in the 9th grade. The girl who called me a slut liked the guy.
I recall most vividly the time that I, along with my entire 8th grade class, constantly referred to a new student as a slut. It was a small Catholic school and we rarely had new kids. She already had large breasts, dyed her hair bright blonde and wore her skirt as short as possible. The rumor was that she didn’t wear shorts under her skirt like we all did and everyone saw her thong. We all hated her because she flirted with boys and they liked her. She was always very kind to the rest of us and only got labeled “slut” because she somehow avoided the physical awkwardness of being 13. We all got really smug in high school too when she got pregnant. Sort of a “told you so” type of thing.
I still feel ashamed about it. We all had to sit through those anti-bullying seminars, but this type of bullying was never addressed.
A pack of girls repeatedly screamed out that I was a slut every time they saw me for about a three-week period in high school. I had recently broken up with one of their friends. Strangely, one of my reasons for breaking up with him was that he was pressuring me to have sex and I didn’t want to.
I was asked if I was a little slut during foreplay with a guy. He and I both knew that the dirty talk was a turn on. In the right moment, name calling can be fun and sexy. But hearing how many times it’s been hurtful to women and girls is heartbreaking.
Some lady called me a fat whore the other day because she thought I was trying to steal her cab. I was just waiting to cross the street. Its so much creepier when women throw around misogynistic terms.
I got called a slut by my male neighbors after they sa
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