Pussy Sore

Pussy Sore
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9 Reasons Why You Have a Sore Vagina After Sex and How You Can Find Relief
There are several reasons why sex might hurt—and thankfully, several ways to soothe the pain.
There are numerous reasons why your vagina might be sore after sex. Tanja Ivanova
First, is it ever normal to be sore after sex?
What causes a sore vagina after sex?
1. There wasn’t enough lubrication for sex.
2. There was a lack of arousal before sex.
3. Your partner and/or the sex toy you’re using is seriously well-endowed.
4. You had rough sex and it caused too much friction.
5. You’re allergic to latex, lube, or semen.
8. It could be due to low estrogen.
At SELF, Lindsey has specialized in culture, love, and sex, but also written about health, food, fitness, and beauty. Prior to SELF, Lindsey wrote about fashion and entertainment for NYLON and Mashable .
Korin is a former New Yorker who now lives at the beach. She received a double B.A. in International Relations and Marketing from The College of William & Mary (which she doesn't use at all now) and an M.A. in Interactive Journalism from American University. Korin has been published in... Read more
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When you’re dealing with a sore vagina after sex, it’s pretty understandable to have lots of questions. If an intense romp leaves you waddling (let’s be real, that’s the accurate and extremely unsexy way to describe it), it’s easy to assume things just got a little out of hand. In some instances, many people enjoy rough sex that causes some level of discomfort. But under most circumstances, your vagina shouldn’t hurt after sex—or during.
After all, being intimate with your partner is supposed to feel good . So, when sex is painful (medically known as dyspareunia 1 , by the way), it’s important to let both your partner and your gynecologist know what you’re dealing with. This shouldn’t make you think there’s something inherently wrong with you or your body. You also shouldn’t feel you just have to live with it either. To get to the bottom of this issue, SELF asked experts to explain the potential causes of vaginal or pelvic pain after sex and what you can do to feel better.
To be extra clear, no, sex isn’t supposed to be painful (and we’re not talking about consensual pain during sex—we mean the kind of sex that hurts when you don’t want it to).
“It’s not normal to be sore after sex unless it’s [your] first time, and there was some stretching of the hymen to contend with,” Mary Jane Minkin, M.D. 2 , a clinical professor of obstetrics and gynecology and reproductive sciences at Yale Medical School, tells SELF. Your hymen is the tissue that’s at the opening of your vagina 3 . Many people’s hymens thin or tear over time.
But just because it’s not normal to be sore after sex doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen. In fact, the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG) 4 says that nearly three out of four women will have pain during sex at some point during their lives. For some people the pain is a temporary issue, but for others it’s a long-term problem.
If you take nothing else away from this article, remember this: If intercourse is hurting you, talk to your gynecologist. Work with your doctor to find out why, because sex should feel comfortable, pleasurable, and pain-free. (Don’t force yourself to put up with anything less!)
This article is a great starting point that can help you understand what might be going on, but it should never replace an honest conversation with a specialist. With that in mind, learn more about the most common reasons for pelvic pain or a sore vagina after sex below:
One of the most common causes of pain during or after intercourse that can lead to a sore vagina is inadequate lubrication . (Take notes, because this one’s going to come up a few times.) Everyone produces different amounts of natural lubrication, and there are plenty of reasons why—age, birth control, and some medications, just to name a few.
When your vagina isn’t properly lubricated during sex, the friction can cause tiny tears in your skin. These tears can make you more prone to infection, and they can also make your vagina hurt after sex.
How to feel better now: Idries Abdur-Rahman, M.D. 5 , an ob-gyn with Vista Physician Group, recommends putting a little lube in your vagina—even after sex. He likens it to putting lotion on your skin when it’s feeling particularly dry; it’s not too late to moisturize your skin, and it can actually have a soothing effect. That said, you’ll want to stay away from any lubricant with alcohol in it. Check the ingredients carefully to make sure your attempts to soothe won’t end up stinging the tears in your skin.
How to prevent pain in the future: For starters, make sure you’re using sufficient amounts of lube. This is an easy step to take to supplement your natural lubricant as you see fit. From there, you’ll want to talk to your gynecologist, who can help you figure out what your options are.
Sometimes you’re just not totally in the mood, and that’s okay. But having sex when you’re not sufficiently aroused can also lead to lack of lubrication and, ultimately, a sore vagina after sex, Christine Greves, M.D. 6 , an ob-gyn at the Winnie Palmer Hospital for Women & Babies, tells SELF.
How to feel better now: In the aftermath, Dr. Greves recommends applying a cold compress to the area. “Don’t apply ice directly to your vulva,” she cautions. Instead, wrap some ice in a clean cloth and either sit on it or lay it on the area (over your underwear) for 10 minutes or so to help tamp down on irritation and possible swelling. Another tip: Give your vagina a break until it feels better, so don’t have sex again until the soreness subsides.
How to prevent pain in the future: Foreplay, foreplay, foreplay! For a person with a vagina, arousal is just as “essential” for good sex as an erection is for a person with a penis, Dr. Minkin explains. Try communicating with your partner and showing them what you like in the pregame department. And, if you want to have sex but you feel like you’re not as aroused as you’d like to be, Dr. Greves says this is another instance in which applying lubricant can come in handy.
If your partner’s penis, their hand, or the dildo they’re using is quite big, it might actually be hitting your cervix during penetration, Dr. Abdur-Rahman says. Needless to say, that does not feel great. According to Dr. Abdur-Rahman, this pain might even feel like menstrual cramps .
How to feel better now: Dr. Abdur-Rahman says your best bet is a warm bath, a heating pad, or a nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory drug (NSAID) such as ibuprofen. All of these things have anti-inflammatory effects, which can reduce some of the soreness. In addition to that, just give it time. It shouldn’t take too long for the pain to subside, and if it doesn’t, talk to your doctor.
How to prevent pain in the future: Foreplay is once again key. According to Dr. Abdur-Rahman, the vagina expands (becoming larger, longer, and wider) during foreplay, which allows for deeper, more comfortable penetration. Foreplay also increases lubrication, which will make penetration a little easier. Once again, adding lube as needed will also help.
From there, you should be thoughtful about your positioning. Dr. Abdur-Rahman says any position that puts the person with a vagina in control of the penetration is a safe bet. Think you on top. Avoid positions that maximize penetration—like doggy style or anything that involves the vagina owner’s legs in the air. Those positions are more likely to lead to a sore vagina.
Finally, take your time. Be slow and gentle, and communicate with your partner about any discomfort you experience. And if you’re using a dildo , consider sizing down. (Check out these female masturbation tips, too!)
Friction can be great! It often is! But too much friction can definitely make your vagina hurt after sex, most likely because there wasn’t enough lubrication.
How to feel better now: If your vulva (the opening to your vagina) really hurts or is swollen after sex , Dr. Abdur-Rahman says you can resting a cold compress on the outside of your underwear for 10 to 15 minutes. Don’t put the ice inside your vagina—that will only irritate it more. Again, give it time, and talk to your doctor if you still have a sore vagina after a few days.
How to prevent pain in the future: Take whatever steps you can to ensure adequate lubrication. Foreplay is a great way to give the vagina time to warm up, and lube helps too. It’s also important to take your time—at least at first. Start gently and slowly, and then transition into rougher, faster sex (assuming that’s what you’re into).
Some people are allergic (or sensitive) to latex . If you’re one of these people and you’ve been using latex condoms, you might end up irritating your vagina, Miriam Greene, M.D. 7 , an ob-gyn at NYU Langone Health, tells SELF.
But you can also be allergic or sensitive to the ingredients in your lube 8 or even to proteins in your partner’s semen. That can leave you with redness, burning, and swelling down there, according to the Mayo Clinic 9 .
If you have a severe allergic reaction to semen, you may even experience a body-wide response that results in hives, itching, or trouble breathing. But it’s important to remember that this is rare. “Very seldom is the issue a sensitivity to semen,” Dr. Minkin stresses. “I’ve seen that a few times in my career, but it’s unusual.”
How to feel better now: If you have a reaction just around the vulva, placing an ice pack outside your underwear to soothe the area for 10 to 15 minutes is your best bet, as well as giving it time. However, if you experience any of the more severe symptoms mentioned above, it’s best to see a doctor ASAP to get a diagnosis for the best treatment.
How to prevent pain in the future: Talk to your gynecologist to confirm your suspicion that you’re allergic or sensitive to latex (and that there’s not something else going on). If you are, avoid latex condoms in the future. That doesn’t mean giving up on condoms altogether—there are plenty of alternatives, like polyurethane condoms, that you can still use to prevent disease and pregnancy.
Quick note: Though polyurethane condoms are nonlatex and help prevent both disease and pregnancy, they have higher slippage and breakage rates than latex condoms, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention 10 . The internal condom is also latex-free, but it’s slightly less effective at preventing pregnancy than latex condoms. You can work with your gynecologist to find something that works for both you and your partner.
If you think the ingredients in your lube are to blame, Dr. Minkin recommends talking to a specialist about undergoing allergy testing. That can help you pinpoint the exact ingredient behind your discomfort, so you can avoid it in the future to prevent pain, soreness, and general irritation.
While it is uncommon, if you suspect you might be allergic to semen, Dr. Minkin suggests having sex with a condom to see if that changes how you feel. If you don’t have symptoms after using a condom and you’re trying to conceive, it’s best to talk to your doctor about your options.
If you’re experiencing discomfort that goes beyond slight soreness—like itching, burning, bleeding during sex , abnormal discharge , or pelvic pain—you might have a vaginal infection. It could be a yeast infection , bacterial vaginosis , an STI , or something else entirely, and the best course of action is talking to your gynecologist.
How to feel better now: Don’t self-diagnose or self-treat; see your doctor, Dr. Abdur-Rahman says. Depending on the infection, you might need prescription medication. So the sooner you can make it into your gynecologist’s office (even virtually!), the better.
How to prevent pain in the future: Preventive methods are going to vary a lot depending on the kind of infection, and you can talk to your gynecologist to get their specific advice on what steps you can take in the future. That said, there are a few good rules of thumb. For one thing, use a condom or dental dam if the type of sex you’re having calls for it. As you already know, this kind of barrier protection can help protect you from STIs . A second tip: Pee after sex to decrease your risk of getting a UTI . And finally, avoid douching. Douches can disrupt your vaginal pH balance , which can make you more susceptible to infection, according to Dr. Abdur-Rahman. And if your vagina is really sore, try putting a cold washcloth on your vulva for a bit if that’s soothing.
If you’re frequently in pain during or after sex, you may have a medical condition that results in pain during or after sex :
Painful sex could also be a sign of a retroverted uterus, cystitis (usually a UTI), irritable bowel syndrome , or hemorrhoids, according to the Mayo Clinic.
How to feel better now: Schedule an appointment with your gynecologist, who will typically do a physical exam or an ultrasound to check for anything unusual.
How to prevent pain in the future: Talk to your gynecologist about what exactly your symptoms feel like and get their advice for the best way to minimize pain during intercourse. Depending on your condition, some positions may be more comfortable than others, and your care provider can help you figure out what works best for you.
Estrogen is a hormone that helps maintain your vagina’s lubrication, elasticity, and thickness, according to ACOG 18 . When estrogen levels are low in the body, you can experience thinning, drying, and inflammation of your vaginal walls, possibly leading to a sore vagina, Dr. Minkin says. That’s especially true if you’re going through menopause , are breastfeeding, just had a baby, or are taking anti-estrogen drugs.
How to feel better now: Dr. Minkin suggests using a long-acting moisturizer, like Replens ($15, Amazon ), down there two to three times a week. This isn’t the same thing as a lubricant: Vaginal moisturizers specifically work by lining the inside of your vagina with moisture, where it stays for several days, helping the vaginal tissue become healthier over time 19 . Lubes, on the other hand, just provide a slick surface temporarily. If any discomfort persists even after using a vaginal moisturizer for two weeks, talk to your doctor about other options.
How to prevent pain in the future: In many of these cases, you can’t really prevent low estrogen. However, if you’re going through menopause (or have been through it), your doctor may suggest estrogen creams and tablets that you can insert into the vagina or using a vaginal ring, which releases a low dose of estrogen over 90 days, according to ACOG. If you’re taking anti-estrogen medication for cancer or are breastfeeding, be sure to discuss any options with your doctor to be safe.
If you recently had a baby or had surgery down there, such as removing a potentially harmful lesion, scar tissue could be “a possibility” for a sore vagina after sex, Dr. Minkin says. Scar tissue forms when a wound heals after a cut, sore, burn, or other skin issue, or when an incision is made into your skin during surgery 20 . If you had a cut, tear, or wound in your vagina “and it didn’t heal properly, that can indeed cause pain,” Dr. Minkin says.
How to feel better now: The best treatment for you depends on the extent of your scar tissue. If you don’t have a lot of scar tissue, you may find that using lubricant during sex will help take away the pain, Dr. Greves says. But if that doesn’t help, it’s really best to consult with your doctor. They’ll want to do a physical exam and recommend next steps from there, which could include seeing a physical therapist who specializes in pelvic issues, Dr. Greves says.
How to prevent pain in the future: Given that scar tissue that forms in your vagina isn’t really something you can easily apply a cream or ointment to, this is a tricky one to prevent. However, if you’re pregnant and planning to have a vaginal delivery or you’re having a vaginal procedure done, talk to your doctor about your risk of scar tissue and what you can do to minimize it.
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Apply an ice pack to numb the area. If you are dealing with a sore vagina, place an ice pack on the area to help lessen the pain. The cold temperature of the ice pack will numb the nerve endings in the area, making the soreness more bearable. [1]
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To use the ice pack:

Wrap the ice pack in cloth. Do not put the ice pack directly on your skin, as it can burn your skin.
Leave the ice pack on the area for 15 to 30 minutes.
If you do not have an ice pack, you can use a plastic bag filled with ice, or a bag of frozen vegetables. Again, make sure to wrap the cold item in a cloth.

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Soak in a warm sitz bath. A sitz bath is a small, shallow tub that is specifically designed t
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